“Your home is living space, not storage space.” —Francine Jay
Recently, the New York Times referred to our generation as the most stressed, tired, and rushed generation of all time.
“A Portrait of the Modern Family,” is how the author chose to title the article. She is, of course, correct. We are tired, stressed, and busy. In the article, the author cites a number of reasons why this is the case: public policy, workplace structure, unrealistic expectations, just to name a few.
Around the time that article was being published, a different kind of report was being produced, The 2014 U.S. Department of Commerce Report on New Housing, an annual study surveying the size and cost of new homes being built.
I couldn’t help but wonder if there might be a significant correlation between the two.
Certainly, there is a direct link with the number of possessions we own and the stress we experience. Every increased possession adds increased anxiety unto our lives. There is a direct relationship also with excess possessions and an overall lack of time, energy, and focus.
The 763-page study on the homes we live in confirms what most Becoming Minimalist readers already know to be true: We own too much stuff—and yet, rather than getting rid of it, we just build bigger homes to store it all.
Here are some findings from that 2014 report and other related sources:
- In 2014, the average size of new homes built increased to an all-time high of 2,690 square feet. In 2015, the average grew another 30 square feet to 2,720.
- While our houses have gotten bigger, our families have gotten smaller. Because of these two factors, since 1973, average living space per American person has doubled.
- The growth in square footage of new homes has wiped out nearly all the efficiency gains. In other words, though energy efficiency has developed rapidly, we’ve increased our home size to the point that we’re still using almost the exact same amount of energy.
- As would be expected, housing costs have risen alongside square footage. In the U.S., the existing home median sale price is $356,700 (up from $154,600 in January, 2012).
- Housing expenses, all totaled, accounted for more than 33% of the average consumer’s total expenditures during 2014.
- Renters aren’t doing much better. In fact, it’s the worst time in 36 years to be a renter in America. The median rent nationwide now takes up 30.2 percent of the median American’s income, the highest cost burden recorded since tracking began in 1979.
- Meanwhile, Americans aren’t even building the largest homes in the world. Australia holds that honor (they are even filming television shows about it). The U.S., Canada, Denmark, and France round out the top five for largest home sizes in the world.
Our homes continue to increase in size, cost, and responsibility. Our biggest investment has become an ever-increasing drain on our resources.
But this doesn’t need to be the case.
Your biggest investment also represents your greatest opportunity.
Consider the benefits of living in a smaller home: less expense, less worry, less upkeep—more time, more money, more freedom, and more opportunity.
When we first began pursuing minimalism, we made a lot of changes in our home. We removed the excess from every room in our house. But when we began removing entire rooms from our home, we started to experience even more significant benefits.
Four years ago, we intentionally decided to downsize to a smaller house. Our mortgage payments were sliced in half. Our insurance and taxes were also lowered. Our energy bills were slashed. Our ongoing repair and maintenance is a fraction of the expense it was before. And our cleaning responsibilities are noticeably easier.
Recently, I was asked by a friend how we are able to make ends meet financially while still doing a fair bit of traveling as a family. My answer immediately centered on our decision to minimize—not just our possessions, but our home as well.
“When the rest of the world was building bigger and bigger, we decided to buy smaller. And that decision has freed us to do many wonderful things.”
Choosing to buy a smaller house is a decision I have never regretted. Likely, neither will you.
Angela @ Setting My Intention says
We have a small starter home that’s about 1,000 square feet and it is plenty big for our family of 5. I’m looking forward to downsizing in the future too! We’re planning on staying here as long as we stay in the same city – we have a very affordable mortgage and a great yard – both rare in the city!
Jesse Nichols says
Excellent article! My wife and I began our minimalistic journey two years ago! I own 17 articles of clothing and we live in a 3 bedroom house now with a monthly mortgage payment of < $600! (We bought in a low-cost area right as the housing market bottomed out.)
I'm struggling because I really want to build an ultra-modern home, but I don't want to make it large (as most ultra-modern homes tend to be). My designer continues to push me toward having more rooms as it is cost-effective to add them and results in much higher sale price if we ever did have to move (though my intention is to live and die in this house). But, I know that we would just end up closing them off and sealing the vents and cracks to save on electricity if we did so!
Kellen says
I really don’t like new homes. I have a 102-year-old Edwardian and it has charm out the wazoo. It’s also practically empty now that I’ve minimized. And yes it’s quite large and can be drafty, but it’s in the middle of the city so it’s perfect for me. My sister owns a new home in L.A. and it has zero character. I don’t care how much you pay for refinements to make a new home look nice, there is nothing like an old home for charm and quality.
Judith Cane says
We have downsized to an 1100sqft house that is just perfect for my husband and I and our 20 year old son. He has one end of the house, we have the other (including my home office) and the living, dining and kitchen is common. Our basement will be finished as an income suite at some point in the future. We have mostly built-ins with a few treasured antique pine pieces. Downsizing has been cathartic in so many ways, it just feels light and clean. Now we are helping my Mother move from a small 2 bedroom to one room in a retirement home and she is struggling with this. As she says, “I don’t know how to get rid of the things I loved and worked hard to keep”. We are speaking with Pierrette Raymond of Moving Forward Matters to help her work through all of this.
Olga says
This is awful to put your mother in retirement home. And plus to this made her to get rid of stuff she loved and maybe it’s all her life in it.
Cinda says
I’d say it’s awful to judge something you know nothing about.
Sandra says
I agree, let’s not be judgmental. It sounds like Judith is taking great care of her mom, even getting her some help with the downsizing.
Karen T. says
Olga, you really shouldn’t say that. You don’t know the circumstances or how much care Judith’s mother needs. This retirement home may be the best solution for the entire family.
joan says
`Based on my experience, if you could find/she could afford a one bedroom suite, not just one room, even if is total is same in sq footage, makes such a difference. The bedroom, being “private” even if staff in/out, is a great place to hang “too much” i.e., lots of important photos or art, can have a bookcase when other personal “treasures” can be displayed even if crowded looking to outside eye. The move itself can be a big deal; not having to give up everything might be a huge help.
Kent F says
I’ve been a real estate appraiser/consultant for 30 years. I certainly see more people downsizing in their later years, than I do seeing younger couples upsizing these days – which is a good thing. Having said that – there are many other criteria to consider – do you envision a parent needing to move in with you in the next decade? Do you have family staying with you frequently? Is this a home your child can still come home to during their college years? The list goes on. The best advice I can give someone is – don’t act or react too quickly. Think long term – not what feels right today.
Arthur in the Garden! says
Yes, I realized a few years ago that having more stuff doesn’t make you happy.
Carol says
My husband and I live in a 2,600 sqft home, large to some, small to others. It is paid for other than property taxes each year. We could do with less sqft, but love our neighborhood, proximity to park trails/church/airport, and the relationships we have with our neighbors and friends here. As we “retire”, we plan to work a small service business partially from home and love that our house can comfortably be our office. We have recently considered moving to a smaller home or even another state, but frankly cannot find a place or home where we would rather be. Before this house, 20 years ago, we lived in a house half this size. The neighborhood went south, our property value declined, and I never felt safe taking a walk there. Here, our house has appreciated dramatically, and I take a walk or bike ride almost daily. Unfortunately, at least around here, oftentimes when you buy in a neighborhood of smaller homes, you sacrifice not just space, but safety, proximity to natural spaces, etc. Also, being able to stay and not move multiple times over the years is part of what allowed us to pay this house off early. Not saying bigger is better because it is not, but just presenting some of the other factors that have been important to us.
Lori in Prescott says
Thank you for this. In our 40 years of married life and many houses, we have paid more for good schools and city services. We have paid more to live with mountain views and walk-ability. We have paid more for privacy. We have remodeled for our taste and comfort. I grew up in less than 900 sq ft and even though the house was charming, there was no privacy and we were not happy when I was a teenager! You can’t sell me on a tiny home. I lived it!
Carol says
And thank you, Lori! I appreciate your perspective an your life experience.
Priscilla says
Hi Lori,
Just wanted to say I really appreciate your comments. I enjoy “reading” you here and on BeMoreWithLess.
Best regards, Priscilla In Virginia
Kellen says
My mortgage is almost paid off and I don’t carry a second, so I certainly have no intention of selling any time soon. I love the city I’m in. Maybe in 10-15 years I’ll do the tiny house thing but not now.
Diane Bonham says
My husband and I are “Flipping” a house larger than we ever have.
It is spectacular. I have been decluttering for 4 years. This one is large but contemporary…. the windows and the views are what make the house.
It is allowing me to be minimalist as odd as it sounds. Another plus side is it allows us to say “Sure bring your parents, and extra few friends!” I enjoyed having a full house at Thanksgiving with plenty of room for all.
That being said, my dream home is a cozy cabin in the mountains. Lol
Carol says
Definitely something to be said for having room for guests and beautiful views!
Jeffrey Pillow says
When I bought my home in 2010, one of the first things a relative who helped us move in said to my wife and me, as we put down the last box inside our new home, was this:
This is a really cute house and will be perfect until you need to move into a bigger home once you have kids.
The kicker is: my wife was pregnant with our first child; as in, we found out that very morning. I kid you not. Only my wife and I knew this.
Did the relative mean harm in her comment?
No, but it was unnecessary.
I was so proud that day until that comment, which bugged me. I had bought my first home. Suddenly it wasn’t good enough or big enough. I knew better of course, and said, “Well, hopefully three bedrooms is enough because we will be living here forever.”
The home we bought — and still live in, now with two kids — is 1,400 sq. feet. It’s almost the identical size of the house where I grew up.
The relative lives in a house that is probably 3,000 sq. feet. Has to be.
My wife and I have minimized our belongings and continue to do so to alleviate stress and spend more focused time with each other and our children.
Less cleaning, more Jenga.
The relative is constantly stressed about how to find new fabrics and rugs and furniture to fill her vast home, and is always having to clean or pay someone to help her clean.
I’ll take my home any day over that stress.
P.S. I told my wife I would love to do a tiny home one day when we retire, but it can’t be so tiny since I am 6’4″. It would have to be a big, tiny house.
P.S.S. The NY Times article is a solid read. Thanks for sharing the link.
Great post!
mia says
Sweet. People certainly do tend to say unnecessary things! Sorry that ruined the moment but you probably taught them a lesson in the long run!
Janna says
We live in a 2 bedroom, 1150 square foot home with four people total (two grownups, two kids & a dog). I have heard some variation of that comment (“cute house but you’ll have to move when the boys are older.” “When are you going to move to a bigger house?” “This will never work when the boys are in high school.” “Such a great starter home.”) many times and it always bugs me. Now before I show my house to someone, I find myself mentioning that we are never moving and plan to die in this house, so they will hopefully keep those comments to themselves. Just like you, I really appreciate living in a ‘small’ house that is easy to clean and maintain with a relatively small mortgage.
Judy says
What’s important is where you’ll go after you die ;P
Kellen says
Dust. Eaten by ants. Burned. It doesn’t matter to me, I’ll be dead.
Karen T. says
We raised 2 teenagers (a boy and a girl) in our 3 bedroom, 2 bath, 1100 sf home, and it was fine! We spent lots more time together, which I thought was great for our long term family relationships, and each kid had their own small room to retreat to as wanted/needed. Now that they’re both grown and on their own, the house is too big for my husband and I! We plan to sell and rent a much smaller space.
Suzy says
Agree! We made the mistake of selling our 1400sq foot house for a 3500 sq foot house because we could or thought we should after having kids. It wasn’t who we were or wanted to be. Luckily we lived below our means and bought the smallest house in the neighborhood and we bought furniture we could afford and not try to keep up with our neighbors. In the end we sold that home and made good money on it. Never again will I feel the urge to buy big or have more than I need. The excess isn’t worth it to me anymore. I rather travel and spend time with people I love. Less is more. Love connecting here with like minded people.
Angela D'Aoust says
Glad to see you are looking ahead with regards to your house and it sounds like you ave chosen well.
My husband and I recently sold our 1400 sq. ft. home where we raised two lovely children. Our daughter purchased our house and they have 4 boys ages 23 months to age 6 and they are so proud to own and live in that neighbourhood. As for us we have downsized to a 1100sq. ft. Mobile home and we love love love it. We live in a park that is well maintained and quiet with a country setting. We no longer have a mortgage and are enjoying our freedom 60 if you will. I enjoy reading this post as it has helped us to rid ourselves of a lot of clutter. So very happy and at peace.
Angela
Mel says
Even a small house in australia is a very big expense. We have a small house & I have no idea how people cope with anything larger! I grew up in a small house. Both of my parents have paid off their mortgages, one is in early retirement. I know people their age with big houses who spent their life upsizing their homes and still haven’t paid their mortgages off… I don’t want that to be me!
I suppose it depends on your income. But I don’t even like cleaning my small house. Can’t imagine the time wasted cleaning a huge one!
Naomi says
Yep – similar to the UK. House prices just keep going up at a crazy pace.
Our bijou 2-bed terrace in Southsea is now worth £200K – I think we are feeling the ripple effect of London (76 miles away) where the AVERAGE price is £530,409 (my mother-in-law’s 4-bed home in Ealing is now worth 1.4 million. Ridiculous).
For Americans reading this, my house is probably 700 sq ft? – we couldn’t move anywhere smaller (except a 1-bed flat) and people here spend half their income keeping a roof over their heads. The future of housing is bleak – even for minimalists!
Cynthia says
Your home is huge! I live in 409 sq feet.
One bedroom. We live in Dublin, Ireland.
I find it a bit small, there are 4 of us and we constantly host guests in couchsurfing.
:)
So, don’t mind others. Your house can hold even two more kids.
Sandra says
The same thing happened to me the day we moved into our 1100 square-foot house. Someone said this is cute for a starter home or something like that, and totally deflated my excitement, similar to what you expressed. It’s interesting how we pick up on these things.
ren says
Love your post…made me smile…im so considering tiny home…
Jennifer Snippe says
We were told the same thing about our 1200 square foot home. But, here we are 21 years later, still in the same home, two kids with our eldest now in university. Granted, we have a mostly finished basement, which adds to our living space by about 800 square feet. It’s feeling more bare with the eldest away, but it never felt like we didn’t have enough space. And we “only” have 1 full bathroom and managed! Even when we had two teenage girls in the house at the same time! Imagine! But, we are mortgage free and can live a life with experiences vs possessions :)
Maureen @ A Debt Free Mess Free Life says
I never wanted to live in a big home and be house poor. I’d rather a smaller more comfortable living environment that is just right. I feel like Goldilocks, but it’s true. When I was actively working in my cleaning business years ago, I cleaned massive homes for families that had only four people in them. There was so much space you literally would have to search and search just to find someone. Is this how families really want to live? Keeping up with others is exhausting and depressing. Not for me!
Stephanie says
Yes! I’ve been really focusing on minimalism for the last year and recently finished a huge whole home purge. Now our current place is definitely too big for our stuff! When we move later this year, we’re going to be going down at least one bedroom (possibly two) and I’m excited. Looking forward to not having to dust and vacuum as much square footage.