Editor’s Note: This is a guest post from Faith Janes of Minimalist at Home.
As a mom, minimalism originally seemed an unobtainable goal. I thought minimalists either traveled the globe with a single backpack of belongings or had a home with a futon and a single vase on a table…if they even had a table. That kind of minimalism works for some people and I think that’s cool. That kind of freedom must be really empowering. But for me, I have these needy little people running around my house that make it abundantly clear that kind of minimalism isn’t coming to live at my house.
Can minimalism really be applied to a family with kids? Sometimes we jump to conclusions that talk us out of starting. Let’s start with what mommy minimalism doesn’t need to look like.
Mommy Minimalism is Not:
- Throwing out all the family photos
- Selling your television, your car, and your couch
- Owning just one pair of shoes and three interchangeable black outfits.
- Getting rid of all the toys in the house (even though we’ve all been tempted)
- Getting rid of all the children in the house (just kidding, but I’ve still been tempted a few times)
When I dove deeper into minimalism and saw the many different ways people were applying minimalism to their lives, I was greatly encouraged. I began to actually believe minimalism could work for me. As I started on my own journey towards minimalism my enthusiasm grew and everywhere I looked I saw where it was desperately needed.
Excess and the Need for Less
Since most of my friends are moms, I began to see the many areas of excess where minimalism could make a real difference:
- Toys spilling out of bedrooms and taking over living rooms.
- Drawers of kid clothes so packed that nothing else would fit.
- Kitchens full of plastic storage containers, useless gadgets, and extra items that never get touched.
- Schedules jam packed with sports and other extra curricular activities.
- Weekends filled with obligatory birthday parties from kids at school that you had to go to just because your kid was invited.
- Families that never seem to have any time spent together because they are all busy doing their own thing.
- Going into debt for Christmas presents that just end up shoved under a bed or in the next annual garage sale.
Many of these I saw in my own life and in our home. There is just so much excess everywhere – excess debt, excess possessions, and excess scheduling. It’s time for less! Minimalism doesn’t have to mean getting rid of everything. It is simply a tangible way of choosing the things that are important and getting rid of the rest.
What Can You Do Today?
If you are sitting there like I was wishing things could be different, then just ask yourself “What can I do today to get to where I want to be?” A mom can’t do everything by herself, but there is actually a lot that we can control and bring back some balance to the family.
- If you want fewer toys to pick up, walk over to the toy box and start going through those toys.
- If you want a cleaner, more organized kitchen, go throw away a few of the gadgets you haven’t touched in months.
- If you want a more cleaned out closet, get rid of the clothes you haven’t worn all season.
- If you want to get out of debt, cut up your credit cards and go sell something on eBay.
- If you want to make some family memories, cancel the plans for this weekend and spend it together as a family.
Each family is different and every journey is unique. Tap into your power as a mom and accomplish something great for your family today.
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Faith is a mom of three who hopes to inspire mothers to pursue “less mess and more time.” You can find her blog at Minimalist Moms or follow her on Twitter.
Jenny says
When I go to a house that has kids I can’t help but wonder why they need all those toys. They have an entire room devoted to toys that likely only get used a few times before being forgotten about. I’ve found that kids can be entertained with just about anything, you just have to have an imagination.
Faith - Minimalist Moms says
You’re so right, Jenny…kids can have fun with almost anything. It’s a pretty common joke that kids would rather play with the boxes that a present comes in instead of the present itself. That should tell us something about simplifying!
Willow says
Great post! As the mom of 4 (now grown) children, I realized I had to limit the number of activities my kids were involved in. We chose to limit each child to ONE extra activity. It helped to make our home life less insanely busy. Thanks for passing these ideas on to minimalist families!
Faith - Minimalist Moms says
Thanks for reading, Willow. Scheduling kid activities can get SO out of hand way too quickly. I like your plan of just one extra activity because even that can add up.
Martine Paré says
What a great post! Actually, being a mom is what got me into minimalism at first. Now that my kids are teenagers, we tend to go toward a “digital minimalism”, meaning less computer games, less MSN, less cellular phones calls to friends, … And less clothes, and less shopping!
Wish you all the joy in the world with your family!
Faith - Minimalist Moms says
Oh yes, digital minimalism…that’s such a hard one these days but I so agree it’s important to keep those things in check too.
Ramblings of a Woman says
Faith,
You really have hit the nail on the head that minimalism is defined by each person and family. My family is about grown, ages 28-17, and the 2 youngest 17 & 19 still at home, so I am beyond that “house full of kids” stage (unless my 7 grands come to visit, lol!) When they were younger and we homeschooled, we did have quite a bit of stuff, books, etc, but we had never been ones for accumulating lots of “toys”. My son had legos, my daughter had her plastic horses and my other daughter her books. We limited their activities to what they were passionate about and at times had the younger 3 involved in the same activity to reduce busyness. Being part of a community theater was time consuming, but having all 3 a part worked out well!
I think one of the most important words in the whole definition of minimalism is “intentional”. It is making decisions about life and not just taking what you are handed!
Bernice
http://bernicewood.wordpress.com/2010/08/27/the-cure-for-the-american-dream/
Faith - Minimalist Moms says
Thanks, Bernice. Yes, being intentional is so important. If we aren’t intentional with our priorities, something else will force its way into our lives.
Jill Foley says
great post…can’t wait to share this with friends.
Faith - Minimalist Moms says
Thanks so much, Jill.
Erma says
I enjoyed reading this! I’m definitely motivated to see an overview of everything and see where I can cut down on things.
Faith - Minimalist Moms says
Thanks, Erma. Good luck on your journey to cut down.
Lynn says
I’m glad to see someone write about this! It’s true that if I lived by myself, I’d be the type with a table I used as a desk/dining table/coffee table (wait, okay, I already do that) but as a mother (and a wife), I have to contend with the fact that my son deserves his own space too.
Something that helped me was giving him a designated storage space for his toys and anything that didn’t fit, I donated. (With a few exceptions, because his Batman trike he got for Christmas is just not going to fit in a toy box.) My mother laughed at the idea but now she’s impressed that I did it…and at the amount of toys he still has.
I have no idea why I’m still typing. Good morning! ;)
Faith - Minimalist Moms says
Thanks for reading, Lynn. Designated storage space is important for sure. One lesson I had to learn the hard way was to decide on the storage space first and then decide the appropriate amount of toys that will fit. With all the great storage options available it’s easy to allow too many toys to stay around just because we have cute containers to put them in.
Melissa says
Bingo! Thanks for this post! I think it is so important for families to learn about minimalism so that we can teach our children how to focus on what is really important. Children are very often targets of overt consumerism, which is so sad. I am trying desparately to raise my two peeps in such a way that they are confident in their own values and don’t need a lot of possessions to feel secure.
Faith - Minimalist Moms says
I couldn’t agree more about children being targets of consumerism. It seems like a natural progression that we’ve been taught. Children = mountains of toys! I wish I had learned about the benefits of minimalism before I had children because it can be hard to make this kind of mental shift. It is hard but definitely not impossible. In fact, it feels great!
Kat says
Our struggle is that my husband and I are minimalists – we don’t like having a lot of things – just a few good quality standards. We don’t bombard our kids with toys for the sake of having them. We don’t buy a ton of kitchen gadgets – if it’s been done for centuries without a gadget, they probably got it right. BUT our extended family (parents, aunts, etc) are the complete opposite. Sometimes we come home and there’s a box at the door addressed to my 5 year old from aunt so-and-so who just couldn’t help but buy here a bunch of cute clothes and send it up. I truly appreciate that people care enough about our kids to want to send them lovely gifts.. I just wish they cared enough to stop! Haha… any suggestions for minimalists who are drowning in the crap other people keep giving us?? Without turning into ungrateful receivers of gifts?
TheSimplePoppy says
I think anyone with children knows how under-represented family minimalism is in this movement. It’s an overwhelmingly “young” movement, almost defined by living anywhere, with nothing (except for the ubiquitous apple accessories), and no solid commitments. I’m so happy to see more family minimalists blogging about their experiences, particularly with children. People need to know that they can do this with kids – and teach their kids about having too much into the bargain. Great post.
Faith - Minimalist Moms says
It is definitely a bigger battle to take on when you’re striving for family sized minimalism. But that just makes the victories that much sweeter when you realize the lessons you’re learning along with your children.
Vanessa Hayes says
What a great post! I couldn’t agree more that families today can easily get so overwhelmed with “stuff” and “to do’s” that it can have a serious negative impact. But as you say, Mom’s can make all the difference! As a mom, professional organizer, and blogger, I’ve decided to do just that. Thanks, and keep up the terrific posts!
Faith - Minimalist Moms says
Thanks, Vanessa. As you know, moms have a lot to juggle but in little bites we can also accomplish a lot too.