“Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all others.” – Cicero
It is discontent that opens up our heart to many of the unhealthy habits in our lives.
Materialism is, after all, the natural behavior born out of discontent with the possessions that we own. We live in a society that breeds discontent by defining the American Dream as owning bigger homes, nicer cars, and fuller closets. Advertisers foster this sense of dissatisfaction by promising greater happiness with their products. And too often, we foolishly fall into their trap without realizing it.
But there are other unhealthy habits in our lives born out of discontent. For example, dishonesty is born out of discontent with the truth. Greed is born out of discontent with our current supply. Substance abuse is born out of displeasure with the current state of our lives. Even many of the feuds in our families are born out of discontent with our closest relationships.
If discontent is the cause of many of our unhealthy habits, contentment is the cure.
And if contentment is the cure, gratitude is the pathway to it.
Gratitude provides proper understanding of our place in the world. Gratitude is the feeling and expression of thankfulness for the actions of others that are costly to them and beneficial to us. By definition, gratitude requires humility. It requires us to admit we have been the recipient of something we did not deserve. And it calls us to admit there are no entirely self-made men or women.
Gratitude assigns worth to those who rightly deserve it. Whether I am thanking a parent, a spouse, a veteran, a teacher, a policeman, or a mentor who has invested into my life, my response of gratitude to their action gives the praise and worth to those who rightly deserve it.
Gratitude directs attention to what we already have. Gratitude always requires our attention to be focused on the good things we already possess. It calls us to notice our blessings and take greater appreciation of them. As a result, our eyes are turned away from the things that are fostering the discontent in our hearts.
Gratitude improves our overall well-being. Scientific studies over and over again confirm what we already know to be true: Grateful people are happier people. Grateful people routinely report increased well-being, better health, healthier lifestyles, increased optimism, and a more positive outlook on life. Additionally, those who display a high level of gratitude are much more likely to have below-average levels of materialism.
Gratitude is not a result of our circumstances. I have lived my entire life inside the United States, but have led numerous groups of people to third-world countries. I can attest first-hand that gratitude is not a result of circumstances. I have met grateful people in some of the poorest neighborhoods in our world and I have met grateful people in some of the richest neighborhoods in our country. I have also met ungrateful people in both. Gratitude is a decision and a discipline–not a response.
Gratitude opens the door to contentment. Gratitude helps us better understand our place in the world. It pushes our praise to those who rightly deserve it. It causes us to focus on the good things we already have regardless of our present circumstances. It improves our well-being in almost every regard. As a result, it is the surest pathway to contentment.
And that being the case, maybe more gratitude is the only thing we really need.
Carole-Ann says
Thank-you! Great reminders how gratitude expands our blessings and happiness.
Meg says
I am so glad I read this post this morning! I have used a gratitude journal on and off for a couple years now. I am also trying to teach our family at dinner or before bedtime to practice gratitude. (With my four year-old we often say “No Attitude Just Gratitude!” and he is able to relate. I have noticed the times I am consistent, there is a mental shift and I am more positive, hopeful, kind. Thank you for sharing this! It inspired me to continue and increase the practice of gratitude!
Meg
Here is a post I wrote on gratitude as I keep working through being more mindful :)(http://amindfuljourney.com/259/)
Miss Britt says
I’m a big believer that gratitude practiced regularly can completely change a life and can absolutely make one happier.
Mr. Everyday Dollar says
Great post, couldn’t have come at a better time because over the weekend I decided that this week I would be more conscious of when I feel envious of others and to embrace how much I already have (material and non-material).
I am taking time each day – once in the morning, once mid-day, and once at night – to journal all the forms of abundance I already have, embracing those things and feeling gratitude for them.
You hit on a great point about gratitude not being a result of circumstances, as some of the poorest people I’ve met in places like India or Africa are the most grounded and fundamentally happy even though they live hand-to-mouth.
Karen @Journey towards simplicity says
Thanks for such a great post! Your words are so inspiring and often validating for me :) Helping others gain such wisdom is still mysterious to me…other than showing them by example :)
Vincent Nguyen says
Gratitude is difficult to practice and I’ll admit that I take many things for granted. There are many things I do to minimize it. Stoicism is a great way that I practice gratitude.
Yesterday I opened my journal to read through my old pages. It was interesting to see how ambitious I was just three months ago. What really made me smile was the fact that January-Vincent had high goals that I hoped to accomplish even if it took years. Then I look into now and realize that I’d accomplished many of them in a matter of months. Then and there, I felt gratitude for all that I’ve done in such little time.
Robyn says
Such a great post! That is exactly the kind of mindset and energy I am trying to create with my Twitter. I am challenging myself to post something I am grateful for everyday for a year. I am using the hashtag #grateful365 if anyone wants to join in! :D
Stephanie Leah says
Everyone deserves gratitude for being who they are. Everyone deserves an acknowledgement of their worth. We are all worthy, the very face that we are here is proof.
Stephanie Leah says
*fact
Barry DeCarli says
Stephanie, you are so right. Thank you for stating this fact, that is so often ignored. Everyone does need validation and an acknowledgement of their worth. I do think that there is a lot to be learned from these ideas about gratitude. My only problem with the above positive essay was this line, “It requires us to admit we have been the recipient of something we did not deserve.” To me that line suggests that some people deserve and others do not; I’m not sure that anyone truly deserves what they get. I am especially referring to the good fortunes that befall some people and not others.
Joel Zaslofsky says
More gratitude, more love, more value, and better health, Joshua. Those are the things I seek each day. I agree that gratitude is the pathway to contentment, but it’s not necessarily the gateway to more love, generating more value for everyone around us, or better health.
However, I’m going to cut my comment short because the spirit of this article was awesome and I don’t want to (even potentially) diminish it. I’ll continue my daily gratitude habits right now – like closing my eyes when taking my first bite of a meal and expressing gratitude for the amazingness that went into bring it to my mouth – and I’ll add one more source of gratitude to the list today.
That would be gratitude for you and what you’re doing for me and thousands of other people by simply being you.
TB at BlueCollarWorkman says
My wife started keeping this gratitude journal thing. She’d write down every day 5 things that she’s grateful for. I think she stopped doing it, but something like that is one way to better remember what we’re grateful for every day. And I bet if you keep training your head to think of 5 things to be grateful for, that eventually it’ll just become what you do all the time!
Brownvagabonder says
I used to do the same thing – but with my commute. Every day when I would drive to work, instead of feeling annoyed at the time wasted, and the road rage that comes with the bad drivers of Toronto, I started listing everything I was grateful for – my life, parents, siblings, Thenix, yoga, meditation, Toronto, music, festivals, clothes, everything I have, everything I have done, everything that is still to come. It helped make the commute a thing of joy rather than a pain.