“Those who are wise won’t be busy, and those who are too busy can’t be wise.” ― Lin Yutang
It was in this video from Jeff Shinabarger that I first heard the phrase, “‘Busy’ has become the new ‘Fine’.” As in, when you ask somebody how they were doing, they used to answer, “Fine.” But nowadays, everybody answers, “Busy.”
Seemingly, busy has become the default state for too many of our lives.
But is the state of busy really improving our lives? Certainly not. Statistics indicate 75% of parents are too busy to read to their children at night. There is a rising number of children being placed in day cares and after-school activities. Americans are having a hard time finding opportunity for vacations these days. 33% of Americans are living with extreme stress daily. And nearly 50% of Americans say they regularly lie awake at night because of stress. This is a problem. We have become too busy.
But it doesn’t have to be this way. Busy is not inevitable. (tweet that)
Each of us can take intentional steps to unbusy our lives.
Consider this Helpful Guide to Becoming Unbusy:
1. Realize that being busy is a choice. It is a decision we make. We are never forced into a lifestyle of busyness. The first, and most important, step to becoming less busy is to simply realize that our schedules are determined by us. We do have a choice in the matter. We don’t have to live busy lives.
2. Stop the glorification of busy. Busy, in and of itself, is not a badge of honor. In fact, directed at the wrong pursuits, it is actually a limiting factor to our full potential. It is okay to not be busy. Repeat this with me: It is okay to not be busy.
3. Appreciate and schedule rest. One of the reasons many of us keep busy schedules is we fail to recognize the value of rest. But rest is beneficial to our bodies, our minds, and our souls. Set aside one day per week for rest and family. Intentionally schedule it on your calendar. Then, guard it at all costs.
4. Revisit your priorities. Become more intentional with your priorities and pursuits in life. Determine again what are the most significant contributions you can offer this world. And schedule your time around those first. Busyness is, at its core, about misplaced priorities.
5. Own fewer possessions. The things we own take up far more time and mental energy than we realize. They need to be cleaned, organized, and maintained. And the more we own, the more time is required. Own less stuff. And find more time because of it.
6. Cultivate space in your daily routine. Take time for lunch. Find space in your morning to sit quietly before starting your day. Invest in solitude, meditation, or yoga. Find opportunity for breaks at work in between projects. Begin right away cultivating little moments of space and margin in your otherwise busy day.
7. Find freedom in the word, “no.” Seneca wrote, “Everybody agrees that no one pursuit can be successfully followed by a man who is preoccupied with many things.” Recognize the inherent value in the word “no.” Learning to say “no” to less important commitments opens your life to pursue the most important.
Busy does not need to define you. Unbusy is possible. It’s okay to be happy with a calm life. And doesn’t that sound wonderful right about now?
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Further Reading
Tehila says
This is such a great and refreshing post. I love moving to a new area, because all of a sudden 90% of my previous commitments have ended and I’m not “busy.” Unfortunately that lasts for about 2 weeks, and I start taking things on again that lead me to the unwanted “busy” state! I love the simple, yet profound, advice that you offer here! Thank you so much for sharing it!
lee says
Thank you for #5, especially! As I prepare to pack my apartment for a move later this summer, I am once again reminded of the value in minimalizing. What do I not need anymore?? What can I live without??
Because as you said – having more requires more – time, energy, etc.
Kristy says
It has taken me many years to realize what was written in this blog post. But once I realized it, it has changed my life. I am also an introvert, so I NEED (from a physiological perspective) down-time to calm and reinvigorate myself. I was running on empty all the time and was wondering why I was stressed, irritable, and angry. I was so busy (mostly from my own doing) and so over-stimulated that I could not enjoy my family and my life. I still struggle with this issue, but when I find myself sucked into the busyness philosophy, I force myself to pause, I schedule rest and down-time, and that helps me put everything into perspective. Mindfulness meditation has also been very beneficial in this pursuit. I used to glorify busyness and wear it as a badge of honor as it was destroying my mental and physical health and making me unhappy. No more.
Jonathan Look, Jr. says
I love all the points but to me number one (as it should be) is the most important. Being busy is a choice. Seems to me many people over schedule, over commit and over consume because they are not happy with their current choices. If you find it necessary to distract yourself from you life it may be time to reexamine your life.
CF says
I am not sure which I prefer. There’s a lot of things about being busy that I like – the sense of accomplishment, the rush of staying up late to finish a project, the drive and the urgency. But I also like morning coffees and lounging in my bed at 1pm with the afternoon sun coming in!
It’s a good balance right now. My job keeps be busy busy busy, but at home, I can be pretty chill.
Slackerjo says
I loathe being busy with the passion of a thousand suns. I work in an inbound call centre and this means I have no control over my workload as I am a slave to the never ending queue. I am leaving this job and I am looking forward to learning how to do one thing at a time since it’s been 9 years.
M says
You’re totally right – it’s a choice. But many of us are so used to it now that it’s hard to stop and to say ‘no’.
Karla McEvoy says
Being too busy can be a problem for some of us. I personally made a number of choices that kept me running in high gear for many years. Eventually, I realized that stress from my crazy busy life was hurting my health. Being healthy became more important to me than being busy. I gradually cut back on how much I was doing which helped me get my health back on track. I am very happy these days living a life that is less busy and more calm.
Jackie says
Karla ~ You said exactly what I needed to hear today. “Being healthy became more important to me than being busy.” I’ve had a few health issues lately that I need to address with better eating and exercise, but I keep telling myself that it’s just one more thing I need to add to my to-do list and I don’t have time to address it. It’s probably part of the perfectionist in me. I want to give it my all or it’s just not worth it because if I screw up, I’ll feel like a failure. Being healthy will help everything else fall into place though. I’ve got to make a change.
kate says
This is the hardest lesson for me. It’s easy to get rid of things, but harder for me to get rid of social activities and work. This is a great reminder that you can’t really right-size your life without examining those as closely as you do the things you aquire…
Thanks!
Erica says
Please, please, please read to your children AND have them read to you. When you do this both of you get quality time together and memories but you are setting up a strong educational foundation. I see too many preteens and terns struggle with reading.