“The potential possibilities of any child are the most intriguing and stimulating in all creation.” —Ray L. Wilbur
Toys are not merely playthings. Toys form the building blocks for our child’s future. They teach our children about the world and about themselves. They send messages and communicate values. And thus, wise parents think about what foundation is being laid by the toys that are given to their kids.
Wise parents also think about the number of toys that children are given. While most toy rooms and bedrooms today are filled to the ceiling with toys, intentional parents learn to limit the number of toys that kids have to play with.
They understand that fewer toys and practicing a minimalist approach will actually benefit their children in the long-term:
1. Kids learn to be more creative. Too many toys prevent kids from fully developing their gift of imagination. Two German public health workers (Strick and Schubert) conducted an experiment in which they convinced a kindergarten classroom to remove all of their toys for three months. Although boredom set in during the initial stages of the experiment, the children soon began to use their basic surroundings to invent games and use imagination in their playing.
2. Kids develop longer attention spans. When too many toys are introduced into a child’s life, their attention span will begin to suffer. A child will rarely learn to fully appreciate the toy in front of them when there are countless options still remaining on the shelf behind them.
3. Kids establish better social skills. Children with fewer toys learn how to develop interpersonal relationships with other kids and adults. They learn the give and take of a good conversation. And studies have attributed childhood friendships to a greater chance of success academically and in social situations during adulthood. Better relationships as a child also tend to lead happier lives in adulthood.
4. Kids learn to take greater care of things. When kids have too many toys, they will naturally take less care of them. They will not learn to value them if there is always a replacement ready at hand. If you have a child who is constantly damaging their toys, just take a bunch away. He will quickly learn.
5. Kids develop a greater love for reading, writing, and art. Fewer toys allows your children to love books, music, coloring, and painting. And a love for art will help them better appreciate beauty, emotion, and communication in their world. It’ll also keep them away from getting used to an unhealthy amount of screen time.
6. Kids become more resourceful. In education, students aren’t just given the answer to a problem; they are given the tools to find the answer. In entertainment and play, the same principle can be applied. Fewer toys causes children to become resourceful by solving problems with only the materials at hand. And resourcefulness is a gift with unlimited potential.
7. Kids argue with each other less. This may seem counter-intuitive. Many parents believe that more toys will result in less fighting because there are more options available. However, the opposite is true far too often. Siblings argue about toys. And every time we introduce a new toy into the relationship, we give them another reason to establish their “territory” among the others. On the other hand, siblings with fewer toys are forced to share, collaborate, and work together.
8. Kids learn perseverance. Children who have too many toys give up too quickly. If they have a toy that they can’t figure out, it will quickly be discarded for the sake of a different, easier one. Kids with fewer toys learn perseverance, patience, and determination.
9. Kids become less selfish. Kids who get everything they want believe they can have everything they want. This attitude will quickly lead to an unhealthy (and unbecoming) lifestyle.
10. Kids experience more of nature. Children who do not have a basement full of toys are more apt to play outside and develop a deep appreciation for nature. They are also more likely to be involved in physical exercise which results in healthier and happier bodies.
11. Kids learn to find satisfaction outside of the toy store. True joy and contentment will never be found in the aisles of a toy store. Kids who have been raised to think the answer to their desires can be bought with money have believed the same lie as their parents. Instead, children need encouragement to live counter-cultural lives finding joy in things that truly last.
12. Kids live in a cleaner, tidier home. If you have children, you know that toy clutter can quickly take over an entire home. Fewer toys results in a less-cluttered, cleaner, healthier home.
I’m not anti-toy. I’m just pro-child. So do your child a favor today and limit their number of toys. (Just don’t tell them you got the idea from me.)
If you’re looking for a little extra help in this area, check out my book: Clutterfree with Kids and this article on our most creative decluttering tips.
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Vanilla ice says
I fell sorry for your kids
Jackie Jane says
Vanilla, are you questioning the idea that kids have too many toys? I can’t believe how spoiled kids are these days. The idea of giving children the tools to play with their imaginations is a far better concept in my opinion.
Shel says
We believe that less is better. We try to Donate at lease twice a year to maintain space.
I am new to your Blog love it Thanks for sharing.
Leah says
LOVE this. Sad when kids lives are loaded with stuff, it’s nice to have a favourite toy and back ups but the more kids have the less valuable everything is. For me the real world is more exciting, interesting, mind-boggling and educational to a child then anything made in China, and it’s up to us parents to empower our kids by teaching them that!
Bec Perkins says
Toys and games can often enhance any child’s catalog involving emotional photos, people, spots along with activities. Toys and games help build vocab because the a lot more discussing a child is progressing greater they could understand.
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Nicole says
Wow!!! My 20 month old son has a lot of toys, my friends 35 month old does not. My son plays by himself a lot when we are at home. He takes toys from one set and play with them with another set for about 20 minutes at a time (that’s about the normal attention span for a child his age) before moving onto the next thing. He never intentionally breaks his toys and I can assure you, if Bert or Ernie were to break, there would be NO moving on to the next toy and just forgetting about them. When he can’t figure a toy out, he brings it to his daddy or I and asks for help. He DOES NOT just move on to the next toy. He goes to daycare and plays very well with other kids. Before bed, we clean up his toys together. We do allow him to watch tv, however, the only show he will watch in it’s entirety is Thomas, and that’s only 15 minutes long. My son knows over 200 words and is eager to learn. He loves to be read to, is recognizing letters and learning to count. And now I’ll tell you about my friends son. He is in daycare as well, but he doesn’t play well with others. He is always grabbing toys from other kids and would much rather play on his mom’s iPod or watch tv. His main toys are cars and blocks. He’ll build a tower, knock it down and then complain about being bored. He has very little imagination and is more interested in watching tv than playing with the very few toys he has. He won’t play with his toys for more than about 10 minutes at a time. As for you saying kids will want to play outside more if they don’t have a basement full of toys, my little guy asks to go play outside numerous times a day and happily stops playing with toys if we ask him if he wants to go outside. A child having a good imagination and social skills has NOTHING to do with the amount toys they have!!! Instead of taking your kid’s toys away, try sitting on the floor with your kid and showing them that his dinosaurs can go for a ride in the school bus, or that his shape sorter makes a good hat, the animals from his toy zoo can visit sesame street, or that some blocks and empty paper towel rolls make a pretty cool place to play with cars. In other words, try parenting and interacting with your child, that’s how they learn!! And, for the record, I work full time, so don’t go thinking I’m unemployed and have a bunch of free time. I MAKE time for my boy!!!
Ali says
I find your comments about your friends child very hurtful. We have different points if view but there’s no place in this world for speaking hurtful words about a child. I’m sure your friend would be pained to read your comments. I’m sure you could have got your point across without resorting to put downs.. Of a child
Sheila says
Also keep in mind 3 is a really rough age. They usually have given up their nap, they’re on the verge of a big growth spurt in both size and ability, and they are learning about social interaction, so they experiment. My son at 35 months was a BEAR. Just willfully awful. I couldn’t figure it out. But now he’s three and a half and a delight. It probably has nothing to do with your superior parenting or your friend’s faulty parenting. Just the age, and the individual child’s personality.
If your child is just like that at 35 months, I hope you remember to think better of your friend!
Jo says
I haven’t any of my own yet but I’ve always marveled at the joy they bring and how underrated the importance of careful parenting has become, particularly of young kids. Over the past few years and this Christmas, I’ve looked on in despair at the increasing number of computer based toys my nieces have received. No one can convince me of the benefits of allowing 1 – 8yr old kids to spend hours, in most cases the majority of their day, heads cocked in all sorts of awkward positions, fingers and wrists bent unnaturally whilst staring at a screen. And yet despite my fear of the addictive nature of these devices on my nieces’ developing minds, they surprise me time and again. I can’t tell you how much their eyes light up and they band so eagerly together when I suggest various arts and crafts. http://www.arvindguptatoys.com/toys.html —- this website has been an amazing resource and a great source of fun and learning for us.
I was a kid just a few years ago and I remember learning to love reading, exploring, coloring and creating things on my own because my parents refused to use toys and the television as a distraction and a substitute for teaching/parenting. My resulting creativity continues to set me apart from my peers at college, even when it comes down to using the technology that they’ve been exposed to throughout their childhood. The more images and toys children are surrounded with, the more likely it is that their creativity will be suppressed. How are they supposed to learn to come up with their own ideas and develop independent thinking when they are bombarded and distracted by programs and toys carefully designed by others who in most cases have only one ultimate goal – to make your kid want to watch/play more and you, ultimately contribute to their pockets. I feel like I’m ranting so I will stop here.
Anyways, your presence on this blog shows that you want to do what’s right and as a young adult I’m saying THANK YOU on behalf of the future adults you will have raised. Equip us with these vital building blocks so that we too can pass it along to our own children, your grandchildren… Think of the kids people, it should always boil down to what’s best for the kids.
Check out the website and go re-learn the joy of playing.
Shalom
Michelle says
I agree with everything said here. I’d just like to add my 2 cents about the television issue. While I do think that TV and pop culture can have a massively negative impact on children ( particularly memory and attention span, but also in increased aggression and decreased empathy.) It can have its place.
My brother and I were homeschooled. My parents always made an big effort to make sure we socialized with kids our own age. The thing is that we already felt a bit like outsiders. The local kids didn’t really read, or listen to music, so TV was one of the things we had in common.
It was great that we had the same reference points as our friends and we could geek out together about Star Trek, The X Files or whatever. I think it’s something worth thinking about if you homeschool. Especially slightly older kids or teenagers.
Rose says
I do agree there is a place for it. you can go overboard with anything, including tv and lack of tv. for me being a homeschool mom going through a stressful time, i ended up going into tv too much, then I realized that once a week, as long as it’s not all day, is not a bad thing to help everyone relax. it’s not a babysitter when your son asks you to sit with him through the wiggles so he can enjoy it with you. tv can be a way to relate to people and share something, just don’t go overboard. but thank you for this article for those who are always tv and don’t realize the need for kids to be out in nature and have hobbies, etc.
KC says
A little TV isn’t so bad, but I would prefer to record certain shows and then pop in the DVD instead of exposing my kids to ads.
After all, you always hear about the occasional horror movie trailer that makes it onto a family program!
KC says
Yes, it’s the preschool age programming you have to worry about though.
Vikki Kay says
Hmmm… I have to take exception to this comment: ‘Fewer toys results in a less-cluttered, cleaner, healthier home.’ In our home of little inventors, the house is covered in scraps of paper, boxes in various states of disrepair, bits of wire, pens, scissors, recyclable containers of all materials… Oh, they are ‘more resourceful’, for sure, without a lot of toys. But not less cluttered!!
Megan says
Ha! I have to agree! i do have a few too many toys right now but my seriously inventive kids play with every single one, all at the same time, creating intricate imaginary worlds, and if they don’t have the toy they use something else. my 4 year old has recreated his own version of Big Ben (the clock in London) in our family room using a mini-trampoline turned on it’s side and a fly swatter and a drum stick and various other articles. Even without toys my house is a mess! i have several little inventions like this at different points all over my house. I am trying to declutter to prepare for a new baby and new stress but let’s be realistic: it’s always going to be a mess! Just, I hope, a little less of one :). Three boys, winter, seriously limited tv time, and imaginations…it’s going to be a mess!
Lucy says
I loved the visuals of inventions all over the house and especially Big Ben!
Angel says
:) I believe that this here article and all of your comments and stories, have just answered my every question!! Thank-you all so much!