“The need to impress others causes half the world’s woes.” —Vernon Howard
More often than we would care to admit, the desire to impress others motivates our lives. This desire to impress others impacts the cars we drive, the clothes we wear, the technology we embrace, and the careers we choose.
Unfortunately, it is often elusive. Cars rust. Fashion changes. Technology advances. And the purchases that impressed your neighbor yesterday make no impression today. As a result, we live our lives with out-of-style clothes, jobs that we hate, skyrocketing personal debt, and jealousy towards our neighbor who seems to have it all… until that unquenchable desire to impress begs us to begin the cycle again.
The hard truth is we often look to impress others in all the wrong places.
Take a moment and identify the people in your life that truly impress you. What is it about their life that inspires you? Make a list. Very rarely (if ever) is it the car that they drive or the size of their home. Most often, the people that truly inspire us possess the invisible, intangible qualities that we all desire.
Consider this list of 15 Intangible, Surefire Ways to Impress Others:
1. Be Generous. Regularly give your time, energy, and money to others without expecting anything in return. The giving of your life to another is one of the most impressive things you can ever do.
2. Laugh Often. Be that person that routinely laughs at other’s jokes and stories. It concretely communicates that you enjoy life and their company. They’ll be impressed and you’ll be a more joyful person.
3. Be Optimistic. Always, always, always focus on the good aspects of people and situations. Sometimes you have to look harder than others, but you’ll always be glad you did.
4. Love Your Kids. And by love your kids, I mean genuinely like them too. Enjoy being with them, spending time with them, and investing in their lives. This love towards children will be evident in your life even when they aren’t around.
5. Be Faithful to Your Spouse. Marital fidelity is going out of style too quickly these days. Stay faithful to the one you chose. Trust me, your friends and colleagues will be impressed… not to mention your partner.
6. Develop Your Strengths. I am impressed by good singers, authors, writers, architects, speakers, CEO’s, computer programmers, mothers, and athletes (just to name a few). There is only one thing they all have in common: They discovered their strengths and developed them with great discipline. Do the same with your unique giftedness and temperament. And regardless of the profession you choose, you will impress.
7. Travel. See the world. You will change and be better because of it.
8. Appreciate Different Opinions. While there is nothing wrong with being dogmatic in your beliefs, a healthy appreciation of how others came to theirs is definitely an impressive quality.
9. Love Your Life. Don’t fall into the trap of living life like everyone else. Avoid television and consumerism. Embrace your passions and find enjoyment in your life. The people around you will be impressed… and jealous.
10. Encourage More. Living your life in competition with those around you will never impress. After all, everyone else is already doing that. Change the world by being different. Seek to encourage and lift up others. And the person who benefits the most just may be you.
11. Love Nature. People who exhibit care for the physical world around us exhibit care for all humanity.
12. Listen Intently. Eyes focused. Ears tuned. Cell phone off. In a world that can’t move fast enough, someone who can find time to listen is as rare as a precious jewel… and far more valuable.
13. Be Modest. You are special, unique, and gifted. And the less you make an effort to tell everyone that, the more they will notice.
14. Be Content. A contented life is enjoyable, desirable, and admirable. Those who don’t have it, desire it. And are impressed with those who have.
15. Don’t Live to Impress. Live to Inspire. Give up your desire to impress everyone you meet. But never give up your desire to inspire everyone you meet.
Of course, the greatest thing about this list is that you already possess everything you need to inspire others. So why not get started?
Stop trying to impress others with the things that you own and begin inspiring them by the way you live your life. (tweet that)
Kristina says
Wow, I am glad I found this website! That was one of the most inspiring things I have read in a long time. I have always, without really realising it, tried to use less and buy less as I felt happiest when I went travelling for a year, with a backpack summarising my entire belongings. No insurance, no appointments, no car to wash, no chasing for the latest fashion trend. I have long wondered what it was that made me so happy that year. I am just really glad that someone put it into the right words…thank you for posting this!
Greg says
Just what I needed. A good reminder of what really is important. Have been pretty hard on myself lately – mostly due to work, income, needing to change job (to an unknown) been in current industry for 30 years. The thought of changing has been very discouraging.
Instead of being down – I need to learn to embrace this change and look forward to discovering the next phase of my life. Thank you.
Steven says
Sometimes the intangible is the most permanent. How we make people FEEL is what matters, not showing off material luxuries. People may forget about your new car or your big house but they won’t forget how you make them feel. That is how relationships are built, and that is how we all find happiness. Great post!
Mae says
What an awesome, awesome list and reminder!! Thanks for sharing it and I am definitely sharing it with others!!!
Ammie @ Domesticallyobsessed.com says
I LOVE LOVE LOVE this list and could not agree more! Great post. I think of these things all the time and you have summed up my crazy thoughts into a cohesive, intelligent manner rather than the scrambly, scattered thoughts I have. I am so loving your blog!!! You know what I love the most? You reply to all your comments! I did a whole thing recently on how much I appreciate bloggers who take the time to comment BACK to their readers. I hate it when you never hear a response back EVER from established writers. So I am sooooo coming back and getting lost at your place.
Thanks for some awesome inspiration!
Ammie
joshua becker says
Well, I don’t actually respond to every comment. To be honest, I’m probably better known for not responding… but it looks like you stopped by at just the right time.
Ammie @ Domesticallyobsessed.com says
Well, then I am flattered you responded, period. It’s nice to hear back and yes, it looks like I certainly did stop by at the right time!
The Prudent Homemaker says
Inspiring! I’ll be linking to this post from my site. I’d like to hang this in my children’s rooms–as well as my own!
Gianpaolo says
“Don’t Live to Impress. Live to Inspire.” Well said. And it’s true. Very nice saturday morning read. I see alot of this live to impress you speak of here in Miami. The cultur here is built on the idea of getting the next best thing. So I decided it’d be better to quit my job, sell my stuff, and head North.
Becoming Minimalist has been a great resource showing me how to do it. Thanks!
Mike Donghia says
Joshua,
You stand out to me among all the bloggers writing about simplicity and minimalism. Your articles are so wholesome, not just focusing on what can make your life better – but also those around you.
Btw, #5 is a good one. I know people will disagree, but marriage is an amazing institution. It promotes long term commitment, stability, and real intimacy. I’m getting married this summer to my amazing fiance, Mollie. Guess I’ll be turning to you for a good post about how to nurture a great marriage ; )
Lindsay Frentrop says
I’ve had your list of 100 things on my fridge for a few months now. I think its time to replace it ~ and this is perfect!
joshua becker says
I think “replace” is the correct term. I’d hate to add “refrigerator lists” to the list of physical things that can be reduced in your home…
Aneta says
Hi Joshua. I feel that I have to print out your list and hang it on a wall in my kitchen. I just have to have it in sight every day:) Thank you for inspiring me to change my life (and to learn English to be able to read your blog:))
joshua becker says
Whoa. Wait a minute. You learned English so that you can read this blog? Positive feedback comment of the century!