Of all the distractions that keep us from living a fulfilled life, the most prevalent in our world today may be busyness.
Possessions and property and the desire for wealth all come to mind, but the greatest distraction of them all may be busyness—it seems to transcend every social class.
I was struck recently by a quote from Søren Kierkegaard concerning the danger of living a fast-paced, hectic lifestyle. Over 150 years ago, he said it like this:
Of all ridiculous things the most ridiculous seems to me, to be busy—to be a man who is brisk about his food and his work… What, I wonder, do these busy folks get done?”
I have found his words to be true in my own life. Being busy does not result in fulfillment and meaning. Being busy may mean more things are getting done… but they are often the wrong things.
A busy life is an unexamined life. And an unexamined life is rarely worth living.
I learned this lesson many years ago when I was forced to slow down in college because of a unique course assignment. We were required to spend 1 hour per week, alone in a room with our thoughts. There was to be no music, no books, no meditation guides, no technology, no thought aids whatsoever. Instead, we were to sit quietly and allow our minds to focus wherever our hearts took us.
The practice was difficult at first, but eventually turned out to be one of the most significant assignments and practices of my entire college life.
The hour of solitude did not result in papers being written, homework being turned in, books being read, tests being studied for, or to-do items being checked off. It didn’t result in the usual busywork being completed. Quite the contrary, it resulted in deep life reflection about the trajectory of my life, the person I was becoming, and whether I even wanted that to be true of me.
It is why, I think, when I first read Kierkegaard’s quote, it resonated so deeply within me. Busyness may keep us rushing from project to project, place to place, or appointment to appointment, but what really are we accomplishing with these hectic schedules?
Rarely does busyness result in the most important work of our lives being completed. It most often just distracts us from it.
I experienced a very humbling moment yesterday. I ran into a friend—a good friend who is battling cancer. And it occurred to me, as soon as I saw him, that I had not spoken with him for over two weeks. Not a phone call, not a text, not a single inquiry into his health. My friend is facing the greatest struggle of his life… and I didn’t even think to check in with him.
Reasons quickly surfaced in my head to excuse my lack of thoughtfulness. I would have checked in, but “I’ve been traveling out of town most of the past week,” “I’m launching this really big project next month,” “I’ve been so busy with so-and-so and this-and-that, it’s understandable that my friend never crossed my mind.”
This, you see, is what busyness does to us. It prevents us from remaining focused on the most important work that we need to do.
Busyness crowds out self-reflection. It keeps our mind and feet always scurrying from one thing to another and never allows us to sit quietly in our thoughts to determine if the next opportunity is even something we should be engaging in.
As Blaise Pascal once said, “All of humanity’s problems stem from man’s inability to sit quietly in a room alone.”
A busy life is an unexamined life. And an unexamined life is rarely worth living. It may be full, but it is rarely fulfilling.
It should be noted, of course, that this does not mean we will not go through busy seasons of life. Every new parent knows there are busy seasons in life. Every college student knows there are busy seasons during a semester. And almost every worker in the world knows there are heightened periods of busyness as deadlines come and go.
I am not saying there is no space for busy seasons. But a busy season is different from a busy life. If you find yourself racing about season after season after season, constantly chasing who-knows-what, you may want to ask yourself if you are finding enough time for meditation and solitude and self-reflection.
In this regard, some have even begun equating busyness with laziness. It is not laziness as we typically define the term, but it can still be a form of it. If our rushing about from one activity to another distracts us from self-reflection, or even worse, the important work that we should be taking up with our lives, it may indeed be a form of laziness—at the very least, it produces the same result.
I am challenged by the words of Søren Kierkegaard. His thoughts on how busyness may be preventing us from important work ring true—especially in our modern culture.
How many regrets have I heard from others who spent too much time working to be present with their family? How many times have I turned the other way from helping another (or simply calling a friend) because of the commitments on my calendar? And how many days have I let pass without focused self-reflection?
In each case, it may be asked, where does busyness get us? What exactly does it allow us to get done? And how might we be using it as a shield from the deeper work required of us?
Bonnye says
When I read “busyness is laziness,” I instinctively knew what you meant, and it was like a dagger to my heart. I fill up my days with so many tasks that are necessary for our household to run smoothly, but they are also a way for me to procrastinate from doing deep work and working toward personal goals. Thank you for writing this article.
Gen says
Somehow, grieving the lost of my father (he took his life away), followed by an intricate family disputes and old abuse stories that came out to it, then the death of my 13 years old dog I had since a puppy. I also lost my 2 jobs recently. I’ve entered for the x times the land of depression and anxiety to a paralyzing level. I follow you for many years and always feel inspired. Now facing it, my train of thoughts keep measuring my value to what I do, what I should be doing, hoping back on the work job, any job, to run away from the dark hollow days. I’ve took action, meditate (yoga nidra), walks out, consulted with shrinks, started a TMS therapy, feel grateful for my lifelong companion and yet stuck in the old pattern of doing/ being. How does one fulfill it’s day meaningfully and on the road back to health in this emptiness. I enjoyed reading all your comments, thank you, and the article of course. Love to all.
Wendy says
Gen,
Your words are heartbreaking. You are “heard” and “seen.” Always believe you are valued by those that care about and love you. You are enough.
Joy says
I relate very much to what you wrote
Grieving for me makes times stand still and even though it is difficult and sad there is a certain dignity because at the time we are taking stock and thinking about the very important issues that we can’t ignore anymore, everything comes up very close to your face and we have to process it.
I recover faster when I just let it all hang out, pottered around, ate nice food, push everything off my plate not urgent…don’t force myself to do anything, get cozy as I can.
I just noticed this is a few years ago. I hope life is treating you kindly x
Maria Pinto says
These are all great comments & I love the piece by T.S. Elliot, very powerful! Part of the excess busyness I think is the false illusion of false importance, & also the fear of sitting quiet with ones own thoughts. To some people it is a luxury they feel they cannot afford, but life is short & passing them by.
John says
I don’t exactly agree. The title of this article for me is more of just a twist to saying “don’t waste time doing things that are not important.” or “always find time for yourself,” or “live more.” But of course “busyness is laziness” sounds more interesting. Maybe you also want to put something like “Lazy is the new busy,” or “selfishness is the new normal.” It almost wants to suggest that busy people are stupid, and those who squander time are living the full life.
Sandra Richardson says
I am an atheist, so obviously I do not believe in a “God”. I do believe, however, that prayer is a powerful tool and can be extremely helpful to many. It works, in my opinion, not because there is someone (“God”) listening or answering but because it forces people to sit quietly, listen to their gut, and think through whatever difficulties they are facing and come up with answers on how to deal with them.
I do this by going for a long walk with my dog in the woods. I’m alone with my thoughts, and it is there that I come up with most of my best ideas/solutions for the everyday problems I face.
Whatever works for you to stop the busyness and be alone with your thoughts, be it prayer, meditation, a walk in the woods, will have a significant impact on the quality of your life.
Love this post!
Bernie Stevenson says
Spot on! I’m an atheist too & totally agree with this view. Yoga, meditation & being out in nature are all very useful for problem solving, relaxation & peace of mind.
shane says
My zen is reading…..just finding a nice quiet corner with a snack, drink and no noise. Then I lose myself in a book that I really want to read….I could do this for thw whole day.
Gayle Gay says
This article is beautiful, Thank you so much for sharing, my spirit is a little perplexed after reading the comment from the person that is an atheist, I will keep you & others that feel that way. I’m confused with you praying, praying is speaking to someone as you say, but then you don’t believe. I guess I’m going to have to go to my lord & savior Jesus/God and prayer for me as well as you & other that are atheist but are praying 🤷🏾♀️❤️🥰🙏🏽
Robert Lyon says
I agree with you on the power of contemplation. When one reverently chooses a prayer, they are most likely to do a constructive and loving thing. In fact, the answer is in the prayer.
Matt W. says
I’m 39 and I’m quitting my job to focus on my mental, physical, and spiritual health; along with reconnecting with my three boys and wife. We’re willing to make whatever sacrifices we need to get out of the rat race and focus on the things that are most important!
Kevin Greenwood says
I did this as well!
I had cancer in 2015, but it took me until 2017 to quit my “dream” job at age 41. Two boys and my wife and a life worth living were more important.
And this year finally had the courage to blog about it!
Congrats MATT!!!
Judy says
Hi Joshua! I am at a good point in my life regarding this article. I am not overly busy and I truly reflect on what’s important. I need the opposite… a push to do more and procrastinate less. I would love to see a future blog on motivation and action ?