Editor’s Note: This is a guest post from James Ball, a former newspaper reporter who thought his story might help others.
A 32-gallon plastic storage container holds approximately 50 paperback books, or 25 hardbacks. If you stack them the right way, you can cram in an extra five paperbacks.
I know this from experience as a book hoarder.
Over the years, I’ve housed dozens of these boxes in my garage. I’ve also stuffed them into closets and tucked them away in guest bedrooms telling myself that “someday” I’d get around to reading the books that had looked so irresistible at the bookstore. But I was lying to myself.
For me, collecting books was no longer a hobby. It had become a labor that was encroaching into my physical space and taking up way too much mental space. Worst of all, I was paralyzed by too many choices, meaning I never read anything anymore.
Something had to give.
A decade ago, my maternal grandmother – the woman who taught me to love books – suddenly died. After the funeral, we set out to clean out her condo.
My grandmother wasn’t a hoarder by anyone’s definition of the word. There were no endless, messy piles of stuff in her house. In fact, she proudly kept her house very tidy and organized, but as we dug into her closets and dressers, it was clear she collected a lot of things. Christmas decorations with price tags still affixed to them, unopened orders from home shopping networks, and – much like myself – a massive collection of printed materials including books.
In her final years, my grandmother led a fairly lonely existence. She had family nearby, and I suspect occasional dinners with them probably blunted the edges of her solitude, but these short visits weren’t enough to fill every single hour. She likely experienced more lonely, existential moments than joyous ones in her final years. Buying things had filled a certain void in her life.
Why, then, in the fullness of life, did I need so many things, I asked myself? I had everything that already mattered. As I hauled the last box of her possessions to a donation center, I vowed that when my time was up, I’d leave my wife and children with memories and experiences, not the chore of cleaning up after me.
When I turned 40, I kicked off a long period of introspection and reflection. I took stock of my life and everything in it. As I read about the minimalist movement, I was drawn to its simplicity and its inherent promise that, with less stuff you actually become a richer person in all aspects of your life.
I read everything written by Joshua Fields Millburn and Ryan Nicodemus. I became a follower of Joshua Becker and Leo Babauta’s blogs and hung onto every word written by Courtney Carver and Francine Jay.
I nodded my head as they spoke of decluttering and removing the inessential. But while I agreed in principle, it was clear I had a problem.
Still, these were my books. My Norton Anthology of American Literature Vol. 1 might not be worth more than a penny on Amazon, but I had toted this very book to my freshman English 102 class at the University of Georgia in the fall of 1991, poring over short stories by Thoreau and Melville. Surely, that had personal value. And hadn’t I always dreamed of someday opening a used bookstore with an ancient three-legged cat roaming its dusty stacks? When that day came, I would have enough books to seed the business. Note: this is exactly how we lie to ourselves.
I had enjoyed almost none of them because I had lost sight of the purpose of owning a book – to extract an experience or bit of knowledge from it and pass it along. By acting this way, I was not only being selfish, but I was doing a massive disservice to myself and others. These books no longer represented joy. They represented unrealized potential and I knew it was time for most of them to go.
I realized that if you’re hanging onto something for no other reason than sentimentality or the thought that, “someday, I’ll need this,” you’re not realizing your fullest self. You’re living inauthentically.
It’s only when we strip away the possessions weighing us down that we can see clearly who we are and what we want to be. Tossing things for the sake of tossing them is a fruitless exercise, but I’d reached the point where my avalanche of books had made me stop loving something I’d once found great joy in. It was the right solution for me.
Getting rid of my excess books wasn’t easy, and it took time. I found myself stalling on purpose.
So I did what any reasonable OCD sufferer would do: I set a firm number for the maximum number of books I’d own. I began paring my collection down from well over 1,000 to 100 of the most essential books – a small number of which I would display for their aesthetic value, but a majority of which I would read and pass along until I owned very few of them then focus on reading solely on my Kindle.
The guy who runs the Boys and Girls Club of America donation trailer has gotten to know me well.
“More books?” he always asks when I drop off another storage container.
“Some good ones today,” I always tell him.
I’m not there yet. As of late July 2015, I’m down to a dwindling selection of 200 books. It’s an improvement that’s yielded an unexpected benefit. With the clutter gone, I’ve had a strong urge to read more. I read voraciously, at least two books a week now.
Suddenly, someday is now. I’d wanted to read Stephen King’s Cujo for nearly 30 years. With the extraneous removed from my life, I finally sat down and read it. Verdict? Decent, but I should have read it a long time ago when it was more my style. This is the danger of holding onto something for too long: it can spoil.
Newly energized in my reading, the only limit is my time, not my desire to collect more books only to squirrel them away in a box.
Another book that survived the cut is Thoreau’s Walden, which I’m currently re-reading. It’s the perfect palate cleanser in my journey to a place where, with each passing year, I accumulate less and less stuff. Maybe my grandkids will thank me someday.
***
James Ball is a former newspaper editor who lives in Northern Nevada with his wife and two sons. He wants to write as a way to help others—not just for work.
Mirka says
‘Suddenly, someday is now.’ I like it. In recent months I have let go of several shelves full of books. Gradually. I read more though and as I went through them I was amazed by some but disappointed by others. The time does spoil the books. There is time and place for each book and if we miss it, the book will never again speak to us with its full strength.
Carolyn Bostic says
“Still, these were my books. My Norton Anthology of American Literature Vol. 1 might not be worth more than a penny on Amazon, but I had toted this very book to my freshman English 102 class at the University of Georgia in the fall of 1991, ”
This is the phrase in which I saw a kindred spirit. Only you, Mr Ball, are farther down the minimalist road than I ever will be. I have Norton Anthology of Am. Lit & Eng. Lit, Vol 1 & 2 (each subject) from my college days. They represent some of the happiest and most challenging moments of my college years with the best professor bar none. They can go in my casket with me. Lol.
Joshua Becker, thank you for this guest post from Mr Ball. I thoroughly enjoyed reading his story.
James Ball says
And thank you, Carolyn, for reading it. I like the image of you taking the Norton to your grave. And really, when you think about it, the Norton packs a lot of punch for a single volume, so that qualifies as a keeper in my book.
Dee ValCouer says
I am passing this along to my spouse. Thank you for putting these thoughts into words.
Jacqueline says
This is why I love our local library, I read heaps of books but don’t have them cluttering up my house or taking money from my wallet!
James Ball says
Yes, yes, yes on the library! I didn’t mention it in the story, but the whole concept of intra-library loans has been game-changing for me for a couple of reasons. Firstly, if you are fortunate to live in an area with multiple branches, you have a large selection of books at your disposal, even if you have to wait a while for your turn. Maybe even more importantly, having a due date changes the way you think about your reading. Knowing the book is due in two weeks creates a sense of urgency that really motivates me to read.
Thanks again for reading.
Chloe says
I thought that I was a book horder, but after reading this and the comments, maybe I am not. I don’t have any unread books and I donate those I don’t love. Since starting my minimalist journey, I have only bought two books. I like to share my books with friends and I love the look of a bookshelf (although I don’t have one as yet… so maybe I’m telling myself porkies..) I have started using the library again and instead of rushing to the chainstores to buy a new release book I think I’ll like, I reserve it online with my library. I always have about five reserves and usually never have a gap where I have nothing to read. I’ve even suggested material they don’t have that I’m wanting to read so now the library is buying my books for me! Also, they have an awesome ebook and audio book service which I know everyone I tell this is shocked so look into that too! Happy reading everyone.
Linda Sand says
I was fortunate that when my allergist said the books had to go our church was preparing to host a book sale. That made is so much easier to donate seven bookcases full of books. That still left me with two bookcases but I’m now down to a limit of six books. I sure appreciate eBooks as I now read more than ever since childhood summers. One of the advantages of being retired is having time to read but I no longer feel compelled to own my books.
Jen says
Thanks so much for this! Every time I read one of your posts, it inspires me to move forward in my minimalist journey. Sometimes I get to a plateau, and I cant see the progress that I have made. I have taken car load after car load to donation, but there is still a long road ahead. Books are one thing that I have had a hard time with as well. I started with about 500 or so, and I have it whittled down to around 100 between mine and my husbands. For some reason I am hanging onto a few very nicely bound text books from design school. I have been able to get rid of everything except a few and I dont know why I am hanging on. I think I’ll go put them in the donation box, thanks for the inspiration and courage to forage ahead!
Sarah M says
Eesh…this is hitting home. I don’t collect much of anything…except books. Though I haven’t worked at a bookstore for nearly a decade (thank goodness, I swear they only hire people that will spend a portion of their paycheck there every week), I still have a lot of books. Three bookcases full. We homeschool, so resources (books) are something that we do use quite often, but I KNOW I have more than we need. I used to have a boundary of one bookcase for the adults in the house, and one bookcase for the children…and it’s now turned into 3. Sigh. I find the hardest thing about passing books along (and I DO pass them along/give them away on paperbackswap), is that I just don’t know if I know people who will enjoy/value/get out of them what I/we did. It sounds ridiculous now that I type that out!
Sarah M
Christine Gipple says
When I moved into my house in 2009, I had 23 bookcases – yes, 23. Some had movies and media, but most contained books. I’m a definite hoarder of books for sure. Over the past 6 years, I’ve donated a lot of those books but in doing a mental count in my head, I probably still have 13 bookcases. My goal is to get it down to half that by year end if not sooner. My 9 yr old daughter is also an avid reader and I’ve passed my habit of saving books to her…which isn’t serving her… Thanks Joshua, for sharing James Ball’s post on your site! An excellent kick in the tail to get moving – now!
Lena says
We can adore reading and not being an owner of every read book…
Catherine says
I always find personal narratives inspiring. We found that the more we get rid of the quicker we get at making decisions. We recently pared down our fiction shelves by 50% and while we are nowhere near 100 books I realised how much ‘someday’ was filling my life with expectations based on an imagined future. My new catchphrase is Tomorrow is Now!
Thanks for sharing.
Laura says
I love this. After my parents divorced, and my mom moved out, I decided to get rid of all of her books she left. They were mostly self help books about getting rid of stress, getting rid of clutter, and saving money. It made me realize the answer to all of those things was as simple as just making the conscious decision to live without stress, clutter, and to save money. After I sold all of her books, I was $500 richer and had a lot more room to breathe.
Joy says
I wonder, did you give her the $500?
Sunshine says
Why would she have given her Mom the $500. If they were things she left behind, obviously not caring to do the work herself of selling/removing them…well she wasn’t entitled to the $500. Logic.
Petra says
I was thinking the same thing!
Sunshine says
Good for you! I hope you used the $500 for an amazing experience like a mini vacation or something. Kudos!
young says
Nicely written illustration…thanks for sharing!