I love the holiday season. It’s one of the most memorable times of the year and a reminder for all of us to focus life on important things.
But it can often become a season of hurry, rush, and stress. We add commitments and events and consumerism to our already-crowded lives during the holidays. In our desire to make the most of it, we begin to lose sight of the true joy of the season.
Unfortunately, busy and “rushed” rarely leads to a merry holiday. If you want to enjoy more of your holiday season this year, identify what to remove.
Start with These Ten:
1. Excessive Gift-Giving.
Giving gifts is just fine, but excessive gift giving benefits no one. It adds debt, obligation, and financial burden to the life of the gift-giver and clutter to the home of the gift-receiver. Over half of us will receive an unwanted gift this holiday season. Make sure you’re not the one giving it.
2. Overspending.
Half of shoppers will overspend their holiday budget. To enjoy your season, stay within the financial limitations you have set yourself. Here are some helpful ideas to accomplish that. You can’t spend your way into a merrier season anyway.
3. Traditions that Don’t Serve You.
Holidays are holidays and traditions are traditions. But traditions are not the holiday. Maybe Rachel Jonat said it best, “We don’t have to continue holiday traditions that leave us broke, overwhelmed, and tired.” If a specific holiday tradition is not adding value to your season, end it.
4. Unnecessary Commitments.
The holiday season is known for its heightened sense of obligation. Work parties, neighborhood parties, club parties, holiday festivities… and the list goes on and on. Quick reminder: You are in charge of your holiday calendar and you do not need to appear everywhere you are invited. Lighten your schedule. If a commitment is unnecessary and not helping you make the most of your holiday season, cancel it.
5. Shopping “Sales.”
Retail stores are full of tricks to get you separated from your money. Sales racks are one of their methods. Most often, shopping the “sales” (whether they be in-store, online, or printed on mailers) results in buying things we never intended to purchase. Keep in mind, if you didn’t know you needed it until you saw it on sale, you don’t need it! Rather than shopping the sales rack, keep to your list instead.
6. Overeating.
Eating delicious food with family and friends is an enjoyable part of our holiday season. So, please enjoy. But do it responsibly. Emergency room visits increases 25 percent to 50 percent after the holidays because of overeating, over-drinking, and people not following their diets. Here’s your recipe for a more enjoyable holiday season: Enjoy yourself, but don’t overdo it. Your January you will thank you as well.
7. Trying to Create the “Perfect Holiday.”
’Tis the season for unreasonable expectations. We often get so frustrated and weary chasing the perfect holiday that we never take time to enjoy the one right in front of us. But once we slow down enough to notice our blessings, we begin to see that we already have everything we need for a perfect holiday season.
8. Holding Long-Held Grudges.
The holiday season is to be a celebration of peace, goodwill, and reconciliation. Yet, for many families, thoughts of peace rarely accompany the holidays. Instead, the exact opposite is all too common. Years of bitterness, resentment, and depression have been piled on top of misconceptions, misunderstandings, and misbehavior. This year, give the gift of overdue peace.
9. Envy.
Envy and jealousy foster discontent and distress. They bind our freedom, lead to resentment, cause us to do things we wouldn’t normally do, and can spiral into depression. But during the holiday season, people are prone to them. We compare our decorated homes, our holiday meals, the money we have to spend, and the amount of wrapped boxes under a plastic tree. Comparing yourself to others is no way to enjoy your holiday season. Appreciating what you have and not expecting more is the best way to enjoy your holiday. Actually, it’s the only way.
10. Your Home’s Clutter.
Excess possessions add burden onto our lives. They make entertaining more difficult and increase the weight of ordinary chores. Because the holiday season often means more possessions entering our home, our existing clutter adds to the frustration. And nobody likes piling clutter on top of clutter. Remove the unneeded possessions from your home. You’ll love a more relaxed, clutterfree holiday season.
The old adage is true: Less is more. Removing the items above from your holiday season will not cause you to sacrifice joy this holiday season—it will bring more of it.
David Arbelaez says
Poignant list. Christmas, or whatever holiday you celebrate, seems to get further and further away from it’s true purpose every year.
And by the way. Let’s stop saying Happy Holidays. Just greet someone with the the holiday you celebrate and hope they are enlightened and mature enough to handle it.
Merry Christmas everyone.
Kate says
Happy holidays!
Anya says
Welllllll…I’m not sure I agree with the part about greeting someone with the holiday you celebrate. Aggressively promoting “Merry Christmas” over “Happy Holidays” has become part of the culture wars in recent years, with this ridiculous notion that Christians are somehow being persecuted by the use of the more generic phrase that doesn’t assume someone’s religious affiliation. I don’t want to seem like I’m part of that, because I’m not. I should add that we’re practicing Catholics, and we send our kids to Catholic school, so when I see folks from the school or church, of course I wish them a merry Christmas. Just my take on it, anyway.
Chris says
I always say “Enjoy your Holiday” because I personally celebrate a secular Christmas rather than a spiritual one.
Rebecca Williams says
Not every person you encounter is a Christian. They celebrate the holidays too but in different ways. Most people say Happy Holidays to people that they don’t know well to include them in a greeting. It’s just a nice gesture and I don’t know, “being nice.”
DJ says
The word Holiday is from Holy Day.
There is Christmas Day in December. Catholics also celebrate the season of Advent, feast of Our Lady of Guadalupe, January 1 is New Year’s Day and we celebrate Mary the Mother of God. The Sunday after Christmas we celebrate The Holy Family. And there are the 12 days of. Christmas and the feast of the Epiphany. I don’t get why people should get offended when they are wished Happy Holidays. It’s a really Holy season.
Carol Garrison says
Greeting someone with the holiday you celebrate and expecting them to be “enlightened and mature enough” to handle it is the hallmark of a non-enlightened and immature person. If I greet a friend who is Jewish, I would NEVER say “Merry Christmas” and expect them to deal with it. The same goes for my Buddhist friends who are celebrating Bodhi Day. I greet someone with they holiday THEY celebrate, and if I do not know, I use the always respectful Happy Holidays.
Andrea Allen says
It is unfortunate and disappointing when organizations we support offer an item such as a tote, a coffee mug, a calendar, or a Christmas ornament as an inentive for us to make a donation. These items only add more clutter into our homes.
Janell says
If you get the address labels in the mail asking for donations, keep them. I use them on the bottom of dishes when I go somewhere. Just stick the dish in the sink to soak for a little while and it comes right off.
Anonymous Please says
Add expectations to this list. My inlaws have unreasonable expectations for my young family every holiday. One of my children has a birthday on the holiday, and this child does not want to spend hours and hours on the road going over the rivers and through the woods on congested roads to Grandma’s house where they are berated and belittled. No, this child wants to go have an ice cream cone and have a nice lunch out. And the expectations of gift-giving. Stop having expectations of what you want your holiday to be and imparting those expectations onto others, because they might have their own idea of what they want to do. At my age and having been a parent for XX years now, I have earned the right to ‘just say no’ and not be questioned about why I do not want to spend a holiday stressed and on the road and in a small house with people who insult me when they do pay attention and ignore me the rest of the time. I have the right to bake cookies and let my kids go to town with the sprinkles while they sit around in their pajamas and listen to music. My parents used to overload my children with plastic junque. Finally, I offered to do the shopping for them. They would send me a check, and I would get what the kids needed or wanted, wrap it and put “from Grandma and Grandpa” on it. That meant one quality Lego set or one fancy outfit instead of 10 plastic junque toys.
David Arbelaez says
That was already mentioned. ?
Sunshine says
This is tough. Just remember you are in control of what you keep. Once something is given to you, you don’t have to keep it. If the person is open to listening, you can explain that every item they give means the child has to get rid of something he loves to make room. So the gift is actually causing some frustration/pain/stress/guilt. Sometimes no matter how much you explain that you don’t need/have room for/want more stuff, the giver does not understand, and it’s even harder to ask them not to give things to their grandchildren. Consider sending a wish list of experiences your child would love: a membership, class or day trip, movie, even food. If you get things you don’t want in your home, donate them or give them to someone that needs them. Don’t worry about them asking where the gift is. If they didn’t listen to your explanation, remind them there wasn’t a place for it in your home and that you would love experience gifts, food, clothing or whatever it is you actually need.
You don’t have to subject your child to abusive relatives. If you still want to meet up with them, plan a different day in a place where you feel safe, and leave if abuse starts. Let them know you will not allow your child to be abused. This is really important for your child so he won’t grow up thinking it’s okay for people he loves to abuse him. You can do this in a non-volatile way. Just be matter of fact without adding fuel to the fire. This may not be easy, but your child will grow up expecting people to treat him the way you allow them to. It is your responsibility to protect him when he is too young to protect himself, and to show him what to allow when he’s grown up.
Sunshine says
P.S. We have one set of grandparents that lets us pick gifts and other that delights in surprising with really loud, big, obnoxious gifts! The kind that are a lot of fun for just 5 minutes or a day. The ones with the unwanted gifts have the best intentions. They really believe they’re bringing joy to the grandkids. They can’t afford much and work hard to find special surprises. I have explained until I’m blue in the face that we do not have room for anything else. They’ve given in from time to time and done gift cards, but they hate that. We just accept the gifts, play with them for the day (if desired) and then give them away. It’s not worth it to argue or hurt them. I remind them over and over, and they know, but they “can’t help themselves” and I don’t see them changing. They might not be around much longer. So I don’t get mad at them for doing what makes them happy instead of giving practical gifts.
I absolutely do not take the children to the homes of abusive people, even relatives. We meet them in public places if we have to at all and keep it brief. I just wanted to add this so you know I can relate, and good for you for standing up for your family.
Donna Saunders says
We celebrate with the whole family (25-30) the Saturday before Christmas. Paper plates, plastic utensils, and solo cups, folding tables and chairs. Everyone brings a dish and their own alcohol. Play a game with a less than $10 grab bag gift. Stopped exchanging gifts between adult kids. Enjoy seeing everyone that we don’t see most of the year. Very stress free and on Christmas day everyone can do what they want.
Ann Warman says
I got so fed up with Christmas being over commercialized and the constant hype (read – coercion to spend) starting as early as October, that I just quit the whole thing. I haven’t put up a tree for years due to a cat who feels the need to climb it, but string some lights on an indoor plant. I give to family and friends throughout the year, enjoying surprising people with a gift for no reason in particular. The most I will do is get restaurant gift cards for my three granddaughters the eldest one’s boyfriend. If the roads are good, I go to my daughter’s for Christmas dinner and will bring baking along. Simple, no stress, no pressure to overspend. I do enjoy looking at the houses with their pretty holiday lights at night and listening to Handel’s Messiah on the day.
laura ann says
Ann Warman: Agree, we got burned out on decorating over time. We are retired and I don’t do holiday decor of any type or spend on useless stuff. My cat would do likewise. Baking some, low key and simple.
Bethany @ Happily Loco says
Our holidays have gotten a lot less stressful since we have moved to Texas. We have very few people on our gift list, and we give our daughter one large gift, with a few fun extras. And somehow it still looks like a mountain under the tree! But we focus on finding the perfect gift, not on spending a lot. And on making memories.
Maggie Jamieson says
My husband & I lived in a 5th wheel RV for 16 years as we traveled the country. When your life literally depends on the weight and balance of what you are towing a strict “acquisition “ policy was in effect. If you want to bring something new in, what are you getting rid of?
Joanna Dean says
Joshua, you are like my own personal life coach. I am in my mid-40’s and I have been slowly growing into this minimalist lifestyle and then I found you. I am so grateful for your message and share something of yours constantly on my FB page. Keep writing!
Patricia A Berardesco says
I am being set-free of “Stuff”… we keep giving and giving it away.. No selling, just giving! It’s awesome! And God shows us who needs it, wants it and will cherish it. We have a newly married couple in our church, who is my “younger” me.. same taste.. so naturally she’s getting all my collectibles! They are saving for a home, so what she doesn’t want, she’s free to sell it to add to her savings! This is what Christmas is now all about for me and my husband. Thank you Josh for guiding us to this “journey of giving”.
laura ann says
Patricia B.: Also doing same thing (some regifting!) giving to group homes and a few friends. some get food baskets. Not much else is done since parents are deceased and no family left. We live a low key lifestyle, don’t party or socialize much.
Tony W says
I hate to say many of those things are what I associate with the Holiday Season. I guess that is the problem for me. LOL.
I am giving the Holiday Season one more try ;-)