“Anything you cannot relinquish when it has outlived its usefulness possesses you, and in this materialistic age a great many of us are possessed by our possessions.” –Peace Pilgrim
Ten years ago, we sold, donated, or discarded over 60% our possessions. We removed clothes, furniture, decorations, cookware, tools, books, toys, plus anything else we could find in our home that was not immediately useful or beautiful.
At the time, the idea of owning fewer possessions was completely foreign to us. Nobody had ever told us living with fewer possessions was an option for life… much less a better alternative to the endless pursuit of more and more.
Looking back, while I would have never admitted with my words that I was seeking joy in possessions, I had become more influenced by our consumer-driven culture than I would like to admit. As a result, I worked long hours to earn money to buy newer technology, trendier clothing, nicer toys, faster cars, and bigger houses. I didn’t really believe the purpose of life was to chase possessions, but my calendar and checkbook sure seemed to declare that truth.
Choosing to intentionally live with fewer possessions was a decision that sounded surprisingly attractive. It was a decision that found its roots in our finances, our family, and our faith. We had grown weary of living paycheck to paycheck, weary of trading time with our kids to manage our possessions, and weary of pursuing worldly gain rather than lasting purpose. Owning less offered escape from the clutter in our homes. It offered escape from the clutter in our lives. It forced intentionality. And it offered the very ideals our hearts most desperately desired.
Since choosing to live with less, we have experienced numerous unexpected benefits. We have more time, more energy, more freedom, and more money to pursue what is most important to us. Owning less means less cleaning, less burden, less anxiety, and less stress each and every day. In short, we are freed to pursue our passions.
Over the years, I have come to define minimalism as the intentional promotion of the things we most value and the removal of everything that distracts us from it. I have found it to be a lifestyle that appeals to the heart and resonates with the soul. Owning less is an invitation that is appreciated, desired, and accepted when fully understood.
Minimalism may be just the answer to a better life that you’ve been searching for all along. (tweet that)
About Joshua Becker
I have things from relatives who have passed that have meaning to me and I find it hard to part with those items. Any thoughts on what to do with those items?
I hear that if you take a photo of these treasures it is easier to part with them. I often think of what it will be like for my children to sort through all the clutter when they are in grief. Grief makes you hold onto much more than you can even imagine ever using. I am trying to give them the important things now. They will be free to dispose of these things as soon as I pass or before.
The young generation on a whole like their homes modern and stream lined. No room for old fashioned clutter. :)
Keep them, why get rid of them if these items have meaning?
Amy, on another of Joshua Becker’s writings someone commented that they took photos of items that held sentimental value before donating or selling them, then made a note next to the photo regarding its meaning & significance. I thought that was brilliant. Store it all in a folder on your computer. (iCloud, or wherever)
Amy, I have found that over time one or two pieces retain all the love and memories and the rest become a burden. My dad passed away 8 years ago and it took me ages to give everything of his away. In the end, I kept two sweaters that truly remind me of him – they’re also very comfortable for lounging. The rest was a hindrance to my healing. I asked myself what my dad would wish for me – and decided he’d want me to remember him fondly when the memory surfaced, but not be reminded at every turn. But this process is different for everyone. And it only works if what you desire most is a clean, calm, peaceful home and mental space.
The mice that got into the garage helped. I was upset for about five minutes that they’d chewed, peed, and poo’d in all those boxes of things. But then I realized those things were old college research papers and those lame certificates you get for everything under the sun during grade school. I didn’t really care about any of it, which is why it hadn’t seen the light of day in years. I threw it all out. What a relief!
I actually find that shopping in more expensive places is better for both my pocketbook (ironically) and my closet. I actually spend less when the items cost more because I have to ask myself if I either really need it, will actually use it a lot, or if I absolutely love it. I don’t even buy everything I absolutely love because it doesn’t pass the other tests. On the other hand, I can walk out of Marshall’s with two large bags full of stuff because it was “cheap”. But it adds up to the same amount as that one we’ll-made item and it adds clutter. Which was the better buy? Bags of stuff made in Malaysia or one tweed jacket made in NYC from wool sourced in the U.K.?
Gosh I absolutely love this, Jill. Very well put! Our local industries are in mass decline, our friends and family who own small, niche, independent businesses struggle to compete with their quality products with cheap, poor quality, non-sustainable items. It’s a no-brainer! Buy less of better quality. Everyone wins, especially our planet!
Thanks for sharing this. I’ve screenshot your reply to serve as a reminder for me. X
I’m in the beginning stages and I’m finding the things that belong to my parents or grandparents that I still have that are hard for me to get rid of because of the memories. I now take a digital photo of it and that way it’s always with me mentally. Then I can find someone who can use it ……I can then give it up gladly.
Also when I do have to buy something I buy the best quality that I can afford……that way I won’t have to replace it before it’s time.
I also belong to a group on fb that people are in search of things. I’ve gotten rid of a microwave ,plants ,dishes ,clothes etc. to people who need them
I think before one can get rid of stuff and stay committed to getting rid of the superfluous stuff in their environment, one must first start using less stuff.
For instance. Using less electricity. Fewer lamps, for example. Less electricity, fewer curling irons, or close dryers… Less electricity, fewer kitchen gadgets that need it. Before we can eliminate things from our life, whether it is clothing, shoes, furniture, gadgets, knick knacks, whatever, we must, must, first relinquish our dependence on them. Do laundry more often, wash dishes by hand, cook differently. Dependence on convenience is a good portion of what drives the need for more stuff and clutter. Tiny house living is nothing new. My grandma had a very tiny house with a passel of kids in it. But they only had what they needed… There wasn’t room for anything else. They were minimalists and didn’t know it.
The first step to minimalistic living is using less, of everything.
A million years ago I came across two books that changes my life and address your very admonition: “we’ve got to live with less..”
The books were, The More with Less Cookbook, and, Living More with Less.
Far ahead of its time considering today’s now awareness of consumerism.
But how does a crafter apply this maxim? Creating requires inspiration, which improves with options, variety, often multi-media. I have purged a great deal of personal stuff, but cannot limit my beading as I enjoy free form, multi-media bead embroidery. I also like to crochet and switch from one handi-art to the next.
Any ideas to share?
I’m very interested in the responses to your question Stephanie. I’m a quilter and have quilted for 20 years. Just saying…..
my understanding is to get rid of clutter so you have time and room to focus on what you value. You value your crafting so why get rid of it?
OLDER PEOPLE on this site, PLEASE TAKE HEED, if your grown children say they do not want something, PLEASE do not take offense and PLEASE believe them…they DONT want it, No sense in holding on to these items.
Had a funny conversation with my oldest, (29years old), I told her I was going down to one set of dishes, she said she was sad I was getting rid of the Christmas dishes….I told her she could have them….but she doesn’t want them either.
So if the kids don’t want them and I don’t want them anymore….its time to let them go, no more extra dishes, one simple cream colored set.
I had a set for every season, but decided I can live with one set. will be taking the extras to the women’s shelter. So that’s two more boxes of things leaving, boxing them up and putting them in car this weekend….Forward Progress….
I agree 100% I sold all of our 20 place settings of the Lenox fine bone china, all the sterling silver forks knives spoons and all the Waterford crystal. Felt so freeing…..
I’ve lived minimalist since 1980 when I moved away to university. Since then I’ve moved all over the country to work in new locations, and I loved being able to just pick up and move within a day.
My biggest challenge now though is my book and old clothing clutter. The books are all reference books that I may not use for a year or two, but then suddenly become indispensable when I do need them. I get rid of old editions when new ones come in, but still I struggle to figure out how to thin the ones I have.
My problem with clothing is that old clothing you normally give away or throw out or turn into rags gets a second life because I need it for working in the bush or tundra, where you don’t care if it gets stained with dirt, bug repellent, squished bugs and blood, or gets torn. So I end up with clothing that is for field use only, and once again, it may sit there for most of the year taking up space, but when I need it, it is indispensable. Usually, I’ll destroy a set of shirts in one field season (pants last longer), so that removes some of the stuff, but there’s always “new” old stuff wearing out and getting moved from every day use to just field use.
I could still probably move in a day, but it would be a very long day and would take a pick-up truck with a trailer (far cry from when I could fit everything two of us needed into a mid-sized car, and drive across the country to start a new life).
Incidentally, ten years ago we furnished our new place with belongings people were throwing away or selling at garage sales, and we spent about $150 in total, and our place looked quite good. People couldn’t believe we had furnished the place for that cheap (people throw away such good stuff at times, especially in some of the fancier neighbourhoods). When we moved across the country again 3 years later we just sold what we could and donated the rest, and once again, fit everything we needed into the car. It is easy to walk away from belongings if you haven’t spent a fortune obtaining them in the first place, and it brings a sense of freedom to be so mobile.
First, I want to thank you for such awesome posts and ideas. You inspire me. I am a minimalist for years now and I am getting even more strict with myself as I age. What is to hard to clean, what is to heavy to move, what gets in the way and never used. It is a lifestyle, I agree and it is so freeing. What I do is twice a year…Spring and Fall, I have a garage/yard sale…this I find to not be just fun to do, but gets even more out of the house, I make some vacation money and I love the social aspect of it as I am about as organized with my sales as I am about the inside of the house. Thanks for such a great site that I love to read and pick up even more tips.
I have found an extremely simple yet effective tool that I use when purchasing an item. I have taken my paycheck and calculated my hourly pay rate after ALL deductions. I will then look at the price of the item in question. The price of a so called “inexpensive” item may actually require me to “work” three hours for it. A large expensive purchase may literally require me to “work” many months for it. Having this mindset has totally changed my purchasing habits.
That’s exactly the same thing that I’ve done forever. I considered how many hours it would take for me to work to pay for the item and it does make you think carefully if the item is worth it.
i can move in 15 minutes …
I LOVE this. New inspiration/goal! :)
“The more we own , the more we are HERE , the more the others see us”
This is the way we are grown up on by our society and advertisements..
I’ve been working on purging my home for the last month so it’s still new and fresh. I’ve found the question to ask myself when I see an object to get rid of or something I’m looking to buy is, “Is it worth my freedom?” Can’t remember which article I read that line in but it’s gold! Is it worth working x hours to buy? Or is it worth x minutes of my day to clean/organise/tidy up?
It is so awesome to hear so many people discussing minimalism in a positive context. It is so rare where I live for people to understand what I am talking about, and it is so refreshing to read through these comments and to see how many people ‘get it’. People just don’t seem to get it, even when I try my very best to explain to them that minimalism allows me to follow my passions, to live intentionally, and to rid myself of the burdens that come with more possessions. As a minimalist, I am free to pursue my passions and to spend my days doing things (both socially and professionally) that I love doing.
After reading lots of articles on minimalism I have done a lot over the last year. I’ve sold a ton of things, cleared most of my garage and sold one of my two motorcycles. My bank now has a good emergency fund and I have a lot less things to take care of. As I sold so many things I could not help to feel guilty that I might be cluttering someone else’s house by selling them all of these things. Now my house looks way too big for my wife and I, but will keep as an investment and we like the are so will keep for a while. I look for things to sell every day, take pictures and research about it to put a good description and everything no matter what it is sells on craigslist or ebay or amazon. I feel great now and don’t plan to ever having so many things again. I was able to focus more and got a promotion at work and working on a second promotion now in less than a year. I remember that Steve Job’s desk only had a computer and nothing else. That will certainly make me concentrate! I still have a ways to go, but I have more ideas to reduce even more. I read at least one article per day. Thanks!
I have often had the same thoughts about cluttering other peoples house when I sell or give away something.
Being raised very poor, I always wanted to have more for my family. When garage sales with great items came along I could get all of the STUFF cheap and so I did. Then I got too much. I hired a gal to help me clean out a few times but then I gathered again.
Being introduced to minimalism has turned my thinking to a more positive direction. Now I am working towards something rather than going away from something. I am really enjoying the process and the fear of not having is going fast. And it is FUN and FREEING.
I’ve been following you for a while now. I love your writing. Thanks for breaking down simplicity/minimalism into manageable actions. Also, I appreciate your direct style of writing – to the point!
My husband and I have a home packed with “stuff.” We retired about 5 months ago and purchased a motorhome. We have been traveling across country for over 3 months, taking very little “stuff” with us, since there is limited space. We have done remarkably well and have lacked for nothing! We plan to throw away/donate, etc things that we really don’t need when we return home. Wish us luck!
We found the same thing. I worked as a traveling RN. We carried with us whatever fit in the car. When we finally bought a house and all our stuff was shipped I looked at it in disbelief and thought “Wow, why do we need all of that?” We clearly hadn’t needed it for several years.
Oh how I wish I’d known this 30 years ago! The thought of less stress and more time with the kids……Ah well, more time with grandkids!
I have been emotionally attached to “stuff” all of my life. I am a frugal person and I like the idea of keeping things that you already have, “just in case” you will need them. I have caught the minimalism vision….FINALLY! I am so excited to break the emotional ties with stuff and spend my money, energy and time on relationships and experiences rather than……thinking about what I need to buy, shopping around for the best deal on what I NEED to buy, maintaining that thing that I NEEDED to buy, and disagreeing with my husband when he eventually says we NEED to get rid of it. I am tearing apart my entire house. I am taking pictures of the memorabilia that has been boxed up in my basements for 40 years, and then I am throwing or donating them. I DO NOT want to be chained to the past I want to live fully in the now. I wish all of you fellow minimalists well. Peace be your journey to simplicity!
I understand buying less, not feeling the need to go bigger or pricier just becaus society tells you you are supposed to. But I don’t understand how paring down what you already have (decorations, clothes, pots/pans, etc.) helps. I need to do that because I’m running out of room, and some of the kitchen gadgets I haven’t used in years, but I like having them Just in case I need them someday. What am I missing? I love the minimalist concept. But just not sure I fully understand it.
Hi Sherri,
My advice would be to pick one room (the kitchen was my starting point) and just start. It’s hard to explain to someone that hasn’t tried this what a profound impact in can have on your life and I suppose not everyone has the same experience. Perhaps hanging on to things is important to you. I found that when I started it was a slow process as I dithered over the lemon zester, the garlic crusher and the cupboard full of electrical gadgets that all did only one thing. I put together two plastic tubs of things I only use for parties and stored them in the garage. We use them about four times a year and it’s also made it easy to loan the ‘party kit’ to friends so they don’t need to buy stuff. Then I went through each drawer and cupboard over several weeks, asking of each item “When did I use this last?” and “Will I ever really use this again?” My first sweep only removed a modestly sized box of things but the feeling of lightness and satisfaction was so strong it propelled me into the rest of the house. I laugh at that first box now. I’ve taken several more boxes out of the kitchen since then.
Start small. Know that you don’t need to live like a monk or even have a house where it’s obvious that you’re a minimalist. (Most people comment that they love my decorating style. They don’t know it’s all about simplification.) Don’t throw out anything you really love, even if you never use it. Start small and see how you feel. I hope that, like me, it gives you a happier life.
Thanks Meg… Your post really helped me!! I am new at this also and know that somethings are harder to get rid of than others but I try to estimate hold old the “thing” is and when was the last time I used it… if I have to think that hard about it then out it goes. I can’t believe how long this process is really going to take… from drawer to drawer~~closet to closet etc etc. But seeing the progress already is encouraging to me so I really appreciate this site and everyone’s imput.. it am getting there!! :)
Thanks for the party box idea! I plan to try this out.
I need to embrace this concept, especially at age 55 and the kids are grown. Its really tough when I have an emotional attachment to obsolete, unused items. Am I correct in thinking the process of becoming a minimalist is painful today to have simplicity tomorrow?
Hi Paul, I’m also in my early 50’s and we also thought this process would involve pain. It hasn’t. It’s been surprisingly joyful. It really can feel like shedding an old skin. There is joy in seeing the pleasure on the faces of people that receive our excess as gifts (particularly young people just starting out), there is joy in knowing that what we can’t give to those we know we can give to charity so that it helps someone else (we decided not to sell stuff), and most of all, there is joy in the way our home feels clean, uncluttered and designed to house us and the things we love to do. It’s no longer a large storage space for accumulated stuff that begs our time to justify its existence.
We got sets of china. I gave one to a friend who was getting married for the second time and had never had any “good” china. She was thrilled. I don’t need all the things I was given so I keep a sugar and creamer from each set of china I inherited and pass on the set. One service was for 24 so I kept a platter. When I go to a garage sale or rummage sale or thrift shop, I look for things my daughter in law collects, or a book I think my mother will enjoy. For me it is the thrill of the hunt. I don’t go to malls or big box stores unless I’m buying underwear or shoes. We’re in our 60’s and have been retired for over 10 years.
My first flat had nothing but a bed and I used a suitcase to store my clothes. Man I miss those days everything was so simple!
I recently wrote an article for the Dallas Morning News about this very subject. There is definitely a simple luxury in living with less.
You can read the article here. http://lifepart2.com/the-stuff-of-life-why-i-sold-all-my-belongings-to-travel-the-world/
Hi. I am a new reader and I felt really fascinated by your writings.
I think the layout is perfect, the picture is very artistic, and the writings are very interesting. :)
Great word, Joshua. Thanks for the challenge.
http://www.newdream.org,
is an organization that advocates celebrating the things that does not have monetary value, slowly reinventing the ” american dream”.
I’ve been on this journey for a while now, and it’s still so hard to get rid of some things. I’ve learned to be ruthless. If it’s not bringing me joy, why should I have it around?
Thanks for sharing your story. It encourages all of us.
Be blessed!
~Chelle
Owning less is 100% the answer to a better life. It’s hard to see this at first, but once you really start living it out, it changes your life!
To be the best minimalist…don’t thing in ways such as “limiting your possessions”
That is a negative statement… I prefer to think of “expanding my opportunities”
Owning less is ALWAYS the best answer to finding your spirit…..
AND What is more important than that?…….
Nothing!
I think there is a progression, though. It starts with getting rid of possessions, but that leads to becoming intentional in other areas: your time, your thoughts, your relationships, your money, etc. Minimalism has come to mean so much more than limiting possessions, to us.
I agree, and now that our kids are entering the teenage years, we are realizing more and more how little time we have with them. They are busy NOW, and will be leaving SOON! Why invest a second more into things, when we have these wonderful people to build relationships with under our roof for such a short time.
Thank you for your blog. I enjoy it very much and am inspired by your journey daily.
I have minimalized a lot of my posessions over the last months and for the first time I get to experience this freedom I heard every minimalist talking about that comes when minimalism starts doing its magic.
Experiencing this myself right now, I can tell you it’s both great and terrifying as I get pulled out of my comfort zone almost automatically every day now.
I don’t know yet if minimalism leads to a *better* life as this is still too new for me, but I can say that it definitely leads to a more interesting life.
A great post J.B!
Anyone who takes the path towards a life of minimalism will soon enjoy the benefits of owning less, the elimination of desire for the latest gadget/clothing must-have, the comfort you can take by realising that no one material possession will make you happy and that happiness will come, almost as a sub-benefit, of redirecting your previous consumerism led free time to more fulfilling activities.
Please take the time to check out my new website, http://www.thedebtfreeminimalist.com for inspirational advice on how to live a simple, frugal, debt-free minimalist lifestyle.
Thank you for the great article! I’ve just started to downsize my life. Fewer clothes means less stress about a growing pile of laundry. Fewer dishes means never feeling overwhelmed with cleaning the kitchen. My dog seems unhappy with my putting away most of his (14) toys, but other than that it’s been smooth sailing. My biggest fear is my job. I’m living paycheck to paycheck and I still have student loan debt to pay down. I’m scared that I’ll spend the rest of my life staring at a computer screen, sitting on my ever-expanding behind, trying to become financially secure. This isn’t what I wanted my life to be like.
Get rid of as many debts as you can and save as much as you can.
When I worked in an office I basically wore the same 3 pairs of slacks, 6 tops, and 3 sweaters in various combinations over and over again. Bring your lunch, do not pick up coffee on the way to work and never use the vending machines. You can save $40-$50 a week that way alone. If you can get by without a car , do that. If not keep a car as long as you can to avoid payments. Do not buy anything on credit, ever. Tina
We began simplifying in 2009 in selling our 3,000 square foot house and big mortgage. I built the house with my ex-husband 20 years prior to selling it. We lived in a 29′ travel trailer for 4 years and both worked full time as we built our dream house. Living in the trailer was an eye-opening experience . . . probably the most valuable life lesson I’ve done so far. Moving into the big house was overwhelming on many levels. I had a sense of guilt consuming so much raw material creating my dream. We soon settled into life, had a son and life was good. When I divorced I had to pay my ex-husband half a million dollars for his half of the house. We spent a fraction of that amount building the house but property values had skyrocketed. I struggled to stay in the house for 6 years after the divorce. Got my son off to high school and decided it was time to get real before I spent all of my equity.
Moving was gut-wrenching and I hung onto the sadness of letting go until only a few months ago. I still miss the house and property (5 1/2 acres) but my (now) husband and I live on the coast. Although we’re renting, we live in a great house with a view of the harbor and the ocean. The house is half the size of our country home and a postage stamp size lot but it’s plenty big enough. Although living on the coast was always my dream we may never have moved here because we loved our country home. We’re no longer pressured to make a huge monthly mortgage or maintain a big house and property. I walk the beach several times a week, work from home and have a community I’d never experienced in our country home. I’m now living another life-long dream.
Another dream of mine is to build and live in a tiny house. However, this isn’t a dream shared by my husband. He’s what’s now known as a ‘prepper’ so feels it’s best to have 10 of everything. Because he loves me he’s agreed to the tiny house idea but his vision is of 3 tiny houses . . . we’re getting there ; )
Thanks so much for sharing your life and inspiring me to pursue a simpler life.
I hear you… I’m in a 3400 square foot house and thinking I was nuts to ever agree to buy something this big. In reality I can barely keep up with the cleaning, and would rather have my feet up or play with my kids than vacuum the upstairs…again… And then there’s the yard…
So this year or next we’ll make plans to move. My husband is on board with this. The challenge will be getting a house no more than 2000 square feet when he wants at least 2400… :)
My husband has also mentioned the idea of owning more than one property for vacationing or to rent for additional income. As far as I’m concerned I am one person, we are one family, so we are good with one house. If I want to vacation somewhere I’ll stay in a hotel that I don’t have to maintain all the other weeks out of the year!
I love this blog and reading replies from people who have the same goals as me. :)
I just read a great article on the benefits of downsizing into a smaller home here: http://blog.realestatebook.com/2013/07/24/benefits-of-downsizing-into-a-smaller-home/
Oh my goodness. I am married to a “prepper” also (I never had a term for it before…I love it)! So much of getting over your stuff is the fear that you might need it someday! Not sure what the best way to deal with it is. I am confident we will get there eventually, albeit slowly. It’s amazing how one can become so attached to stuff!
We moved to a larger house about a year ago, and keeping up with it has been time consuming and overwhelming for me. Getting rid of our stuff is helping, as is buying less, too.
Eliminating the excess surely brings a sense of peace and content in life. I am new to the journey and your blog is such an inspiration!
Great article. I think minimalism allows you to focus your life.
We are also going through this process. We had wanted to begin a couple of years ago, but got an offer to live on a large piece of property, 7 acres, which we really needed to experience. That property came with a 2700 sq ft home, not what I wanted but the experience was needed to happen. Now we are all (2 adults, 2 children & our zoo of kittes and 2 dogs) living happily in an 800 sq ft home and loving it! Garage Sale #2 in April. We keep realizing we need less and less. Our priority is to travel more. So nice to have less, we still have a long way to go, but you have to start somewhere!
As Thenix and I look to travelling for a year or so through South America, I have to figure out what to do with all of our stuff. Even though we are not big consumers, we still have a lot of stuff to store away. Furniture, clothes, electronics. We only have a 500 sq.ft apartment but we have surely crammed it with an abundance of things. Just deciding to go on this trip led us to cut down on our ownership – we got rid of a lot of stuff that was just hanging around – it made us question everything we bought and received. Owning less is an answer to a lot of questions in our lives.
My wife and I have recently begun to go through this metamorphosis from living a consumer based life to a life of less. As we tell friends and family that we are selling stuff the first response we usually get is them asking something about us not having enough money. It is really difficult to actually explain to someone that you want to choose to have less in your life.
“Choosing to intentionally live with fewer possessions was a decision that sounded surprisingly attractive.” I am going to be sending some people this statement and keep it in my arsenal as we continue on our journey.
I get what you are saying! My mother thinks that my frugal/minimalist lifestyle is because I am desperately poor. The opposite is true, I am able to put 40% of my income in the bank.
Interesting irony that the people who look rich are poor, and the people that look poor are rich….isn’t it? :)
I have never been interested in what the “Joneses” of the world are doing. I just don’t want to be the biggest mess in the room. My kids give me things, my friends give me things, and sometimes I find what I need at a rummage sale or yard sale. I think all of us have an image of our selves and when we meet that image we are happy.
I also have people in my life that don’t get it. We recently downsized to a smaller house even though when we moved my husband got a raise. My mom still talks about how nice my old house was. It was too big I could never keep it clean. It had so much room I never had to throw anything out. I am so much happier now with a smaller more manageable house. We are still working on it, I am going room to room. The ones I am done with I love being in.
This is my goal in the near future as well…we have no problem financially to keep our ‘big’ house going, but the space bothers me as I am not a cleaning fanatic (hence a big reason I love the clutter-free lifestyle;]). People in our family think we are nuts to want to downsize to a more moderate house as ‘you have THE house most people aspire to’…but I aspire to less because I know it to be more :)
We achieved a similar thing by dividing our home. We converted one end of it into a flat for our daughter and her partner. This gave them the opportunity to live well while they studied and also to practice minimalism because the space was small. Sort of independence with training wheels. Now that they’ve moved on we’ve got one of my daughter’s friends living there because of difficulties with her family and we like the idea of making it available to people in short term difficulty. Someone suggested renting it out as a holiday flat to make money. They don’t get it. That would mean more cleaning, more work and spending money on replacing things that are worn or damaged.
I am a new follower and will be looking to your blog as well as your book, Simplify, for guidance over the coming months.
I have already started the process by clearing out an enormous amount of kids toys, clothes, books and shoes. Next is the kitchen!
My fear though, is that once I have reduced everything we own down to what we need, how will I stop things creeping back? What strategies can you recommend to make sure I don’t fall in to the trap of feeling like I need “stuff” again?
I am VERY slowly trying to simplify…but I think the best way to keep your possessions reduced once you get there, is to adopt the 1 thing in – 1 thing out rule. If you do acquire someting new, something you already own must go! I wish I was closer to this goal myself…
Gina, I find sometimes the best rule is just the “1 thing out rule”. Something leaves; don’t actively try to replace it. :)
I delay purchasing things. I research it, look at and then wait at least a couple of weeks sometimes longer. I usually but not always find, life is great without it!
I’ve been using my Amazon Wish List for this very purpose. I’ll maybe see something cool, research it, find the right one for me… and then add it to my Wish List.
If I still feel the same in 2-3 months, I’ll go ahead with the purchase. If I find myself staring blankly at the screen, wondering why I ever thought it was needed, it gets deleted from the list. It helps to cut out SO many unnecessary impulse buys.
Agree, or start with one thing in, 3 things out!
Hi Kelly,
I’m relatively new to minimalism, (1 1/2 years), and have discovered that “creep” is toughest when you first start your journey. One way I have learned to combat it is to keep a small notebook with me that has several tabs. One tab is for my “needs”, items that I do truly need for myself and my home, and that have to be budgeted for. A second tab has my budget and purchases which allows me to see how much money I really do have to spend available at any one time. My budget is based on cash so that I don’t fall into the trap of charging it just because I can. The third tab is for items I have seen and wanted, but not necessarily needed. I note where I saw it, how much it costs, and what date I saw it. Then I force myself to wait at least one week before buying. Most of the time I don’t end up buying it, and on the rare occasion I do I apply the one-in-one-out rule and sell/donate the old item if at all possible. It’s not a perfect system, ( I still have to avoid stores like Sephora entirely), but it’s working 90% of the time and I have been able to get myself out of debt within a year using it and my home is less cluttered and more comfortable to live in.
Annie – your notebook with 3 tabs is a great idea! Thank you for sharing. So simple, but yet so powerful. Thanks!
Thanks so much for this comment, Annie. Excellent advice and I’ll be using this system too.
Great idea Annie! Thanks!
In response to the women who says she avoids places like Sefora to keep down spending etc. I have learned that these kind of stores are my friend. I can’t afford most of the items that they sell but I can afford the samples they give out. I sometimes bring old sample bottles and refill when I am out of old samples. Or the staff are more than willing to supply me with the newest products to try. I have trained myself to not use as much product as well therefore my facial care costs have gone down considerably. Yes, there are times I do have to break down and buy what I need. Just remember to think chemical and cruelty free.
I play a game with myself whenever I want to buy something. I have to answer “yes” to 1 of these 3 questions:
1) Do I need this?
2) Do I love this?
3) Will owning this make me happy?
Kelly… when you have enough time to appreciate EVERYTHING that you own, then it’s time to add more things… if you can keep fully appreciating everything, then you know you’re ok… it’s when we have so much stuff that we can’t appreciate what we’ve got…IMO
One thing that works for my clients is to limit the size of the space you allot to items – for example, when I have used all my hangers, I have enough clothes or when a shelf is full, I have plenty of that item. Don’t try to be “creative” and fit in double the amount – you are just undermining yourself. A new item IN means an old item has to go OUT (or you really didn’t need to buy it) Focus on the quality of what you do with your time instead – for example, less time cleaning and more time visiting with friends. Best of luck!
Grow up.
I am relatively new to this too, when I am considering buying anything I ask myself, “will this enhance my life?” Usually it won’t!
I have read Marie Kondo’s book on Tidying and personally, I have stopped overacquiring after keeping only the stuff I need and appreciate. You will be very choosy, resulting in focusing on buying things that genuinely make you happy, and that leads to buying less stuff. You develop this sense of value, which will help prevent succumbing to “retail therapy”. And you also will be able to get rid of stuff easily. I recommend her book.
That book gave me an entirely new way of looking at my life and the things I thought I HAD to keep because it was a gift or belonged to my Mother. It’s taken a while but now I walk through my house weekly and pull more items to sell or donate. It’s gotten to be fun to purge.
One thing you might do as you clear stuff out is reflect on what the stuff you keep reveals about you and your passions and interests. Reducing the amount of stuff you have can also help focus your pursuits and separate the ones you are passionate about from the ones that are just mild fancies that you think you’d like to do “when you get around to it.” When you see something you think you want, take time to reflect on whether you’d actually benefit from it or not. Would it contribute to your engagement in those things you value, or would it distract from them?
Once you feel the joy of having a simplified life, you will feel differently about shopping. I hardly shop anymore and when I do, I can walk out of a store with out anything in my hands. It has been the most freeing experience in my life.
If you feel you “must” at least go to a thrift store, instead of buying new. The damage to your finances will be minimal and you will be helping a worthy cause. Also, the desire lessens when you don’t come home with shiny new stuff in pretty packaging. And, decline the bag at the thrift store. And if you discover that you didn’t need it after all, donate it back. After living this way, you will discover how little you really need.
I would say don’t focus on that concern. The answer will come as you go through the process of getting rid of things. Once I saw how much stuff held me down, and how difficult it was to sell items that came into my home, I stopped buying as much. When I DO buy something I have a one in one out rule. Sometimes even a one in 2 hour rule. The more I got rid of, the lighter I felt. The lighter I felt, the less I wanted to buy stuff for my home that I didn’t truly love or need.
We started noticing things creeping back in after a whole summer pare-down last year. I realized I was buying without mindfulness. I always use a cc (we get points, we don’t carry a balance) so it didn’t feel like money. I was a bit out of control with spending, not only before the purge but afterwards as well. I now stop at each purchase and just go through a series of questions suited for me: when will this be in the landfill? Do I have something that can work already? What could this amount of money do for a disadvantaged person in my community? What would I get rid of because space is sacred now (not limited)? These questions. I also take a LONG time to shop, and I usually un shop about half of my items. Hope these ideas get you started on what will work for you!