Note: This is a guest post by Britt from Tiny Ambitions.
It’s weird to think I’m already six months into my year-long shopping ban, which means I’ve spent the last six months not buying anything other than the essentials: rent, food, and toiletries.
Is that radical? Some people might say yes, but I don’t think so. It was simply a reaction to my life situation.
Owing to an uncharacteristically spendy December (thank you, unexpected car repairs), I needed a refresh. I had felt the slow creep of my compulsive shopping tendencies start to slip back into my life.
It was time for a change.
After six months on the no-buy train, I’ve learned a thing or two about myself, my consumption habits, and the process of shopping bans themselves.
Shopping Bans Shouldn’t Be Controversial
It shouldn’t be controversial for someone to say “I’m not going to buy anything I don’t truly need for x number of days”.
Perhaps it just sounds radical because we’ve been conditioned to believe we need new “stuff” all the time, but really, we know that isn’t the case. It’s just clever marketing disguised as sage wisdom.
We’ve gotten to a place where over-consumption is normalized. It’s normal to own 300+ pieces of clothing. It’s normal to live in a house that is twice the size of what we actually need. And, of course, it’s normal to go into debt to keep up with the Joneses.
When consumption is viewed in these terms, it’s easy to see why embarking on a shopping ban of any length could be considered extreme. It’s so far outside the norm for most people.
I Have More Than Enough
This comes from an absolute place of privilege, but in no time over the last six months have I felt like I was lacking an item. I never felt like I didn’t have exactly what I needed, or I couldn’t make it work with what I had.
Because I knew I had to use my stocks of consumables, like toiletries, before I could replace them, it was easier for me to appreciate what I had. There was no easy gratification option.
Since I knew I couldn’t buy anything, I actually started to notice all of the “stuff” I did have in my life.
This is especially true for the cosmetics and personal care products we use on a daily basis. I never realized how many tubes of deodorant or body lotion I had in my bathroom cupboard until I started the ban.
I haven’t had to buy a new deodorant or lotion since January, and I suspect I won’t have to for a while. (I also discovered I had a stash of seven toothbrushes—in a two person house. How many mouths do I think I can brush at once?)
Mindful Consumption
When undertaking any sort of lifestyle change, it’s initially easy to view desires from a perspective of lack. “Why don’t I have this new, trendy dress?” “Why do I have to drive such an old clunker?” “I need this new shining possession to fulfill my life.”
Based on my experience, that mindset changes once you realize how much you do actually have in your life. All you have to do is stop to notice it, instead of moving onto the next sparkling item when the opportunity presents itself.
This kind of scarcity mindset is pervasive, and one that needs to be kept in check as often as possible.
Are you buying this item because it’s on sale? In the case of my seven toothbrushes, absolutely. But here’s the thing we always forget—if it’s on sale now (when you don’t need it), it will probably be on sale again (when you do actually need it).
This is another surprising outcome of my shopping ban. Rather than helping me reduce my focus on the stuff in my life, it has actually amplified it. Everything I own now exists under a microscope, waiting for me to decide how and if I can better utilize it in my life.
I don’t think that’s a bad thing. Being hyper aware of everything I own will help me make better consumption decisions in the future.
DIY Is An Essential Skill
I don’t know if it’s because of the shopping ban or if it is entirely coincidental, but I’ve had to repair a lot of my clothes over the last six months. My long underwear, cardigan, winter socks and yoga pants all developed holes.
None of these repairs were very hard. I grew up sewing and quilting with my grandmother, used to make most of my own clothes, and even took fashion design in high school.
However, being self-sufficient at something, even if it’s just something small like mending holes in clothes, is a really good feeling. And, it’s an indispensable skill when you’re trying to reduce your consumption.
If I didn’t have these skills, I would have had to replace those items of clothing (or do without). Sewing for the win!
I Love Old Stuff
What? A minimalist who actually likes “stuff”? That can’t be right.
About one month into my shopping ban, I went into a local thrift store with my partner who was shopping for some work clothes. As soon as we walked into the store, I knew I was in trouble. Everything called out to me.
The vintage hard-sided luggage oozed of adventures once taken. Old kitchen appliances harkened back to delicious meals shared among friends.
That’s when I realized it. I love old stuff.
I love imagining the lives of the people who used to own these treasures. Each item is full of history and stories—a time I’ll never be able to experience.
This small trip to the thrift store helped me clarify exactly why it is I love certain things. And, I think that’s ok. There’s nothing wrong with loving any kind of “stuff.”
I’m a minimalist, not a soulless robot.
Certain things move me. Vintage, well-worn, beautiful curiosities are some of those things.
Now that I know this about myself, I can reshape my buying tendencies post-shopping ban to re-align with my values. As much as I can, I’ll continue to replace my possessions with second-hand items when the time comes.
Shopping Bans Are Not That Hard
When I first announced my ban, so many of the comments I received were from people who never believed they would be able to undertake such an extreme challenge in their own lives.
While I have had my fair share of temptation over the last six months (I am a reformed shopaholic, after all), once I got to the place where I knew a shopping ban was something I needed to commit to in order to get myself back on track, it has been relatively easy to stay the course.
If you don’t think you would survive a shopping ban, let me assure you, you absolutely would. Give yourself a little more credit. You can do anything you put your mind to.
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Britt blogs at Tiny Ambitions. She is a minimalist, a simple living advocate and a tiny house enthusiast. You can also find her on Instagram sharing pictures of her adorable, cross-eyed rescue cat.
About Joshua Becker
Dear Joshua,
thank you for your insightful posts
Instead of a “radica” l shopping ban, I have traded my merchandises and asked for the refunds and kept them in my gift cards.
Being mindful about savings, I have personally saved money this way after the holidays. There were some few items I wanted to return because I have changed my mind about keeping them.
Some stores would be happy to let you have a store exchange or refund.
I usually ask for a store refund. That way as I am postponing my spending and saving it in a gift card. I have at least 3 that I haven’t used up all yet and would do so when I wish to do so.
Stores usually like this type of trading and it’s a good way for them to dealing and benefitting their customers because they want them to spend and mostly return to their stores. It is a win-win for everyone.
I guess I am on a shopping ban because I rarely buy anything. I can afford to buy whatever I want (within reason) but I have enough so do not buy. In the past 6 months I have donated far more than I purchased and I am continuing to purge. It feels good to clean out a closet. I wash everything and make sure all accessories are included and I put stuff in clear bags (never garbage bags). I do buy gifts for my two young grandchildren. It gives me joy to give them new clothes and they are both growing so do need them.
I tried a shopping ban for 30 days a couple of years ago in January after spending too much on the holidays. I was amazed at how many times I felt I had to ‘get something’. Shopping is now so easy and automatic – I feel I need to revisit cuz the crafting supplies are getting out of control! New colors, technologies, textures every day – I love them all but have a room full of beautiful colors and supplies. Time to take a step back again (after I just ordered some new colors!) – this popped up at a good time. So freeing –
I understand a shopping ban. I never buy anything I don’t need. I don’t hoard up deodorant or other supplies. Sometimes I dream of buying items that would be useful. My last purchase was a Fuller scrubber brush with a long handle because my knees are shot.
My question is this…Do you have no family with birthdays? Weddings? New babies in the family?
Just food, mortgage, insurance, medical bills, and other normal bills are what is keeping the majority of Americans from saving money.
Seriously, we’re trying. Love the “thought” of a minimalist life.
My sisters-in-law and I we often get to find few things in thriftstores that we like and talk about it. I do my errands on Sundays and my curiosity goes to what is in those stores that people don’t want. With kids back to school, very few supplies are needed, but I usually wander there to find office supplies, frames pictures, rarely appliances (no refund for any returns) recently I became hooked on a bike, nice style for people little like me.
I have long found that shopping is easy for me to resist. My husband does grocery shopping and sticks to the list. I don’t particularly like shopping myself, so its no hardship – I don’t see it as a leisure activity and its not my idea of entertainment. I try and use what I have, or adapt something – many of my clothes are re-hashed from something else and I don’t follow someone else’s idea of what is in fashion. However, when I do mention this to anyone, they say ‘oh – what about the High Street? If we don’t use those shops, then they will go!’ They also rail against online shopping for the same reason. However, for me, the waste and the over consumption is far more of an issue. I’m not attracted to new objects and love the idea of upcycling – but for this, you need to buy screws, varnish, paint, sewing tools etc etc. Sometimes, you just have to buy stuff to re-invent the old stuff. I don’t set myself rules because I don’t seem to need them. Most of our furniture is recycled or given to us, I haven’t bought new clothes since I don’t know when (5 years? Probably more – some I still wear are 40+ years old) and I make gifts and cards. Its no big deal to me – I don’t throw much away – it eventually comes back into use in one form or another. Its pretty easy for me.
Can I still buy things for others? i.e. grandkids, games on line, etc.
I would think you could, just have your boundaries established regarding that.
Of course! But don’t buy something just for the sake of showing up with a gift. For your grandchildren, ask the parents what the child might want or need. Keep in mind what they already have. I have bought very little for my now two year old grandson. He has lots of toys and has other people who buy too much. I am not going to compete. I told my daughter in law to make a list of books she wants for him. He loves the bedtime reading ritual. He just got a big boy bed, so I am going to message them and ask if they need some more bedding.
I followed several minimalist blogs and then read Cait’s book, I was already about 6 months into my not shopping life. Major changes for sure!!! I did survive and see it is easier to pay bills, I still have way Plenty and work on reducing stuff and piles. Best gift, time back that is at home instead of running around. Eating at home better out of garden! Thanks for the encouraging words!
I’m in the same boat. And I will join you!!! I will stick this on my fridge too. We have to remember – we are enough without all the stuff. :) Best of luck to you!!
I like this as a meme which helps to counter the consumerist disease that serves o keep the rich few rich. Unfortunately, it is also difficult in some respects. Here in the UK basics and taxes are punitive and even not buying non essential stuff can lead to having to work full time just to tread water.
For a couple of years, I did not buy ANYTHING on Thursdays. It was fun!
Great idea!
“I’m a minimalist, not a soulless robot.” – had me laughing out loud. Great article. A no shop ban has been on my to-do list for a while now, but in the meantime I like to read about others experiences.
This is so inspiring! I’ve certainly cut back on my consumption in the last year or so as I’ve started on my minimalist journey, but I haven’t done a full shopping ban. I think I will try it over the summer. Thanks for sharing your story!
I’m so weak!! I lasted 2 weeks and fell down the Amazon rabbit hole.I think I need to get rid of my computer.I am addicted to online shopping.It is like a drug to me to fill out my order and receive my purchases and then I spiral when I get my Visa bill.I need help!!
I have a question about your book “Simplify”. Namely, is the copy an e-book or an actual book? I’m hoping it’s an actual book as I have downloaded e-books before and then forgotten where I downloaded them to. I am not very computer literate, to say the least.
Hey Marti, Simplify is a digital only book, but Joshua does have two books in print. You can find them here.
Thank you for the info.
This is so great! I want to go on a shopping ban, I’m close. I have significantly reduced my purchases of ‘things’ and its made a huge difference in my stress levels. The rush you get from getting a good haul at the drug store wears off when you get home and have to find a place to put everything. I’m happy to say I also haven’t bought deodorant, lotion, or makeup in at least 6 months. And for the first time ever I ran out of body wash and didn’t have a stock pile. That feels great and I want to run out of things more!
This sounds fantastic, but how in the world did you deal with Christmas and birthdays, etc? I feel like half of my shopping is for gifts for my large family of in-laws.
Hi Hannah, my partner and I don’t exchange anniversary, Christmas or birthday presents – so we don’t have any issues that way. My partner handles the few gifts we buy for his side of the family and I buy a couple of gifts for my mom every year. We still keep things minimal, but we recognize that our family didn’t sign up for minimalism when we did.
We are assigned names through an online program Elfster for Christmas. We each just have one person to buy for. I give everyone a Christmas ornament every year as a gift.
I put an end to Christmas giving a few years ago. With three growing grandchildren, it just got to be too much. Instead, I take each child out on his birthday and let him decide what we will do and where we will eat. I give memories instead of stuff.
I am going to go on the shopping bank. I am a compulsive shopper and need to stop buying stuff I don’t need. Loved this post thank you.
Good Post
I love it Mr Joshua Becker. I always say…when u know better, you will do better. I myself took a look at what I already had. It was truly enough. When I do go into stores, I’m mindful of what I dont need. I appreciate your sharing your resources. It inspiring for others to follow..
Thanks, Rhonda! It’s amazing how recognizing how much you actually need in your life changes your perspective. That simple shift in mindset makes a world of difference.
“We’ve gotten to a place where over-consumption is normalized.”
Thank you for calling this out. It is amazing to me how little thought is given to this reality. When I walk into
a thrift shop, I am always reminded of just how much stuff we collectively have out there, stuff with nowhere to go. I haven’t tried a formal
shopping ban, though I am ready, but I am a very discerning consumer and try to buy second hand, thus not contributing to new material and resource consumption. I, too, am drawn to old, worn things. But it’s funny, I try to keep my own belongings like new. ;)
Thanks, Christine – I’m glad that resonated with you. I struggle with the mainstream conversation that we need new outfits for every event, new cars every five years and every fancy kitchen gadget you can possibly imagine. That consumption treadmill is too much for me. From a fellow second-hand shopping, I know exactly what you mean! I love shopping second-hand, both for financial and environmental reasons. But, when I walk into second-hand stores, I can’t help but feel overwhelmed by the amount of stuff that people have decided isn’t good enough for their life anymore. Maybe if we changed the way we treat our stuff from Day 1, less of it would end up needing to be trashed, recycled or donated.
I had the same thought when I walked into a community thrift sale being held in a church basement. The basement was filled with STUFF and two days later at the end of the sale it was still filled with STUFF and we had to pack up all that STUFF and load it into a truck in the hope of getting a few more dollars when the STUFF was now weighed. The amount of man hours that went into trying to make a few dollars off all this was crazy. We didn’t have a problem finding people to donate, but not many people were buying.
I am retired, with enough but limited income. Having always been a bit frugal, this was not hard for me. That said, my beagle was diagnosed with a severe heart condition requiring expensive medication, etc. For the past 8 months I only pay bills, buy food and try to make my dog as comfortable as posdible. I too realize how much I have and how little I require. When you think of the importance of a life…stuff comes second.
I’m so sorry to hear that your beagle is sick. My family dog was diagnosed with Cushings Disease towards the end of her life and it had a big impact on my mom’s finances. You’re right though – stuff comes second. I’m so grateful that you’re able to provide the medication that your dog needs. I hope he or she starts feeling better soon!
We do this as a family quite often, we call it a no spend/no waste month. It helps us to pay more attention to what where we have gotten loose with our budget/spending, and we start paying more attention to the amount of food/products we are wasting. It’s a great way to recalibrate!
That’s so awesome, Emily! I’ve done a couple month-long bans in the past and I always found them so useful in hitting the reset button. Even a month is long enough for you to learn where your money has been going and if it actually aligns with your values and your savings goals.
I’m worried I would go on a huge binge after the ban. How do you not go overboard when the ban is lifted? I would probably have a bookmarked list of everything I wanted to buy.
If I could pipe in and say anything that might help here, I would share that my own two-year shopping ban was more like a browsing ban. That’s really what I had to do: stop looking for more, and start appreciating what I already had. I deleted all bookmarks and didn’t create more. I deleted my Pinterest account. I unfollowed brands/retailers on social media, and unsubscribed from their newsletters too. If you’re out there looking for it, you will almost always find something you want to buy. So, what happens if you stop looking? :)
Cait, I just finished your book and it was wonderfully written, very raw and honest. Thank you for sharing your story. I highly recommend it to anyone who hasn’t yet read it!
I couldn’t agree more, Cait! Thanks for sharing your experience. My ban so far has been part actual shopping ban and part browsing ban. It makes such a big difference when you go to the effort to delete your accounts, unsubscribe and unfollow from sites and brands that are just trying to sell you stuff. I agree – if you keep looking, you’ll probably be able to convince yourself you need something. If you stop looking, that changes everything.
Hi Cait! :)
Truer words have not been spoken.
I did a ban for 1 December to 28 February. Then in March I started writing down all my purchases. I spent about R7000.00 on clothes shoes and accessories in that time. Now I have pressed the “restart” button on the ban. This time around, I renamed one of my savings accounts to “Shoppin Ban” and have in two days, saved R450.00.
The idea is to save every penny I would have spent, in that account. Items I chose not to buy: Two pairs of Mary Janes (buy one get one free) and a brown handbag. I didn’t need either one.
All the while I keep reminding myself that yu did t Cait. You had one pair of jeans and repaired it until you no longer could..
So, armed with The Year of Less, to Buy or not to buy, The more of less and soulful simplicity, here I go again!!!
Exactly what I’ve been doing. I’m going on 3 years now just buying the absolute necessities. But if I do see something I really love and want…I won’t feel guilty about purchasing it.
I love your post !! That’s me exactly, I’m always browsing and then wanting more, when I really have too much of everything. I need a shopping/browsing ban. Thanks for the tips on deleting in social media. That’s a huge impulse for me .
I am so inspired! Would love to take a break from consumption. It sounds refreshing and not getting caught up with having to have a certain item because it’s on trend or cool would be liberating.
Kudos to you!
I know for certain I have a problem and after reading your post I WILL GIVE MYSELF A 6 MONTH BAN!!! I know it won’t be easy for sure. I actually work in a Shopping Mall and it’s soooo easy to buy something when “needed” So here goes! Till DEC ’18 need Xmas Holiday.MAYBE I SHOULD PRINT THIS AND STICK IT ON MY DESKTOP.
Ya! Congrats on committing to your six-month shopping ban. You should definitely print it out and stick it to your desktop! You’d be surprised how effective that kind of positive reinforcement is in helping you stick to your goals. I wish you all the best with your ban – I know you’re going to do awesome!
I have recently bumped into a related post about this! Going on a shopping ban really has so many positive effects, at least for me. But I started out doing it unconciously since I am more inclined to saving now than spending as I recently got engaged and expecting a baby! Great share! :)
Thanks, Ellaine! Congrats on the new life changes! A shopping ban can make all the difference when you need to save for things that getting married or having a baby. I’d recommend it to anyone!
Best thing I ever did too. It’s stunnjng how much money you can save. In the last five years, I’ve almost paid my house off because I don’t spend on anything but essentials.
It’s crazy, isn’t it? I never knew how much I was spending on stuff until I started the shopping ban. It’s made a huge difference in my finances.