Note: This is a guest post from Elissa Joy Watts of Simplify Magazine.
“Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?” —Mary Oliver, excerpt from The Summer Day
What did you long for most from your childhood summers?
For me, it was freedom. Delicious freedom from predictable schooldays. Freedom to lay in the sun, devour ice cream, and float for hours in a turquoise pool.
My summer longings have not changed much. A sun-drenched break from the routine sounds too good to be true, honestly. As a working mom, however, I know poolside paradise will elude me. Instead, the season will welcome busyness.
From where I sit, summer’s two major opponents are sky-high expectations and the pressure to “do it all.” Corporate socials and family get-togethers. Planning a picture-perfect getaway or entertaining kids from dawn ‘til dusk (and then some). Then there’s laundry and groceries and shouts of “who left the screen door open again?!”
The tension is palpable. Often times, our knee-jerk reaction is to purely survive. Sanity, money, rest—these are common sacrifices on the altar called Summer.
But believe it or not, a simpler more satisfying summer is within reach, regardless of our individual situations. The pursuit is straightforward and anyone can start today.
It boils down to pausing before the chaos and tuning into your desires.
—
In his timeless book, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, Stephen Covey implores us to begin anything with our desired outcome in mind. His commonsense principle yields positive gains regardless of context.
In this case the question is simple: What do you hope to achieve by summer’s end?
- Do you want to feel rested?
- Are you hoping for quality time with family?
- Are you ready to get ahead on your creative project or invest more in your community?
To enjoy summer and avoid becoming a slave to stress and obligation, this is the one thing to accomplish today before things heat up:
Define your happy ending.
A simple way to pinpoint your happy ending is to choose a word to epitomize that which you seek. The word will serve as a mindfulness cue, sort of like a North Star as you navigate obstacles and opportunities.
For some people, choosing a word is as simple as pouring a tall glass of water. Their spirits are thirsty for peace.
Others wrestle to clear their head and consider possibilities. If you’re in the second camp, here are some worthwhile ideas:
- Rest
- Play
- Community
- Knowledge
- Renewal
- Family
- Creativity
When a word hangs in the air and calls for a refreshing sigh, you’ve nailed it. If not, think about what’s lacking in your world. What would revive you this season?
The practice of choosing a single word is an increasingly popular alternative to New Year’s resolutions, but I think it’s most effective in the midst of hasty seasons like summer.
Sometimes all one can do to regain clarity is call forth a single word.
The beauty of this practice lies in its ability to distill complex decisions. Once a word becomes a primary focus each day, many affairs take care of themselves, provided we maintain fortitude and navigate life accordingly.
Each and every sunny day will run away from us if we aren’t careful to hold its hand and enjoy its company. What do you desire for your summer? Undue stress? Debt? Broken summer toys and dizzying schedules?
Or would you prefer breathing room and mindful memories? Once you get in touch with your summer longings and capture them in a word, paring down summer is much simpler. The key is to focus on your desired outcome and seek out ways to embody it as much as possible. After all, it’s your wild and precious life.
In the spirit of practicality, allow me to help you on your way. Think about this:
How might you embody your word at home and at work? What will you hold space for? And how will you move through your day in a way that honors summer’s spacious spirit?
Embodiment looks different for everybody but there are some fundamental principles behind this exercise. Temper possibility with reality. Slip inspired moments into the everyday routine. Be intentional with marginal time. And try to avoid heaping more onto your brimming plate.
Here are some ideas to spark your imagination:
Rest
- Create a peaceful morning playlist to set the tone for your day
- Block out one afternoon or evening each week to protect life-giving downtime
- Commit to eating lunch outdoors alone, away from your computer
- Set a curfew on your phone to hold yourself accountable to get ample sleep
Play
- Create a short bucket list of simple weekend activities and pencil a few in right away
- Do the things you loved doing as a kid: flying a kite, water play, bike riding, popsicles
- Take advantage of local summer festivals
- Make time for board games at home
Community
- Plan a low-key bbq with neighbors
- Set a simple recurring event with a few close friends
- Shop locally and get to know your neighborhood vendors
- Initiate an evening childcare swap with friends
Knowledge
- Hit the library and use the early morning sun as reading light
- Choose new podcasts to enjoy on your commute
- Visit a local museum and chat with the curator
- Follow your children’s curiosity and teach them something new
Renewal
- Get back to doing something you once loved: a hobby, a book, an activity
- Work through a cluttered area in your home to clear your space and mind
- Chip away at a lingering household project
- Prioritize one or two simple weekly self-care rituals
Family
- Initiate a low-key summer weekend tradition
- If you’re a parent, give your kid(s) an opportunity to plan one big activity each
- Make picnics a thing
- Set up a tent and vacation in your yard
Creativity
- Borrow inspiration in the form of magazines from the library
- Pick up a simple new hobby
- Take advantage of the extra daylight and get up early to do something you love: writing, drawing, scheming
- Stock up on sidewalk chalk for the kids
The key to making this choose-your-word practice successful is to stay focused as you navigate your days. I’m leaning toward renewal.
Which word will you focus on this summer?
***
Elissa Joy Watts is the Managing Editor of Simplify Magazine, a quarterly, digital publication addressing some of the most pressing needs of the modern family.
Kristy Hickey says
We have winter here in Australia at the moment, but my word for this season is ‘fun’. I have a 5 and 7 year old and we are going to the snow for a few days. This trip is amongst a bunch of other activities and moments I want to spend with them and my husband. There are so many responsibilities in our lives, so much that has to be done rather than what we ‘want’ to do. So I want to make sure that every day during this season we do something ‘fun’ that makes us smile and laugh together! Thanks for this article and the tip to have an aim in mind. Really helpful and insightful!
Steveark says
We loved summers and I think we did them right. The kids loved sleeping in, until they had full time jobs in the summer, and they liked being home from college then. I still worked full time so my summers were no different than the rest of the year except the kids were way more fun in the summer and that carried over to the rest of us. Now that we are empty nesters summer is not really a thing. Like weekends, we avoid touristy stuff in the summer because there are just too many working people with their families crowding up everything. We just fish, run and play tennis like we do the rest of the year, but with a whole lot more sweat! It is funny how summers were a huge thing when we had kids, now, not so much.
Sarah says
I normally really enjoy the blog posts on this website. I find this one really does not speak to me as a mother with a young baby and 3 year old. Perhaps it will mean more when I have 5 minutes to myself again! Renewal or peace were the most appealing but seem least possible at present.
Joanna Schoff says
Rest and play. I hope to “plan”very little and be spontaneous this summer.
I will try my hardest not to “do all the things”.
Its only 8 weeks long (for a teacher) so its very precious to me and my 3 children.
Amelia Shannon says
Great post and very timely for me. I was getting a guilty feeling that I don’t have a spectacular getaway planned for my family b/c we are focusing on paying down debt. But your piece was just what I needed to remind me we don’t have to get on a plane to find what I’m looking for which is my one word: connection. I just want to connect with my boys and there are tons of inexpensive ways to do that. Thank you for sharing your wisdom!!
janet says
I tend to over schedule during the summer. I don’t want to miss out on any of the fun. So for me, the big thing it scheduling downtime into each week so all the outings don’t become a chore.
Joy says
My word is “FAMILY!” My husband, Chris, has a brain cancer which is not cureable. We have felt the amazing peace and presence of Christ through all of this! We have experienced much love & support from our neighbours, our church family, and our families. Our 3 adult children and their families have/are planning to get together at least once a month to celebrate life & family.
Ola says
This comes at a perfect time, my husband and I were just taking about this the other day. We felt like the summer was getting away from us, and ended up having the perfect summer day- including dipping toes in the creek! If I had to pick just one word, I think it would be peace.
Thank you for a great read, and a lovely framing of my day, and hopefully, season.
Anonymous says
My word will be recovery. I am recovering from a broken toe caused by tripping over my six-year-old’s toys left on her bedroom floor (it happened while she was at school, and she and her eight-year-old brother got them cleaned up within 30 minutes of getting off the school bus that day). I’m also in physical therapy for rotator cuff impingement syndrome caused by lifting heavy bins while decluttering in the basement. Finally, I am having a hysterectomy in a few weeks. So I will have to recover from abdominal surgery. Meanwhile, I am trying to do stuff to prepare without hurting anything else! I am giving my 12-year-old daughter life lessons in cooking and laundry so that she can be helpful while I recover. I’m tackling some yard work.
laura ann says
Anon: kids were not allowed to leave toys out eons ago, back when kids got spanked for not picking up their items off the floor or chair, incl clothing. I recently decluttered the garage, and pulled a muscle in lower back moving storage bins. I unloaded two 18 gal. bins, have two emptied so will donate them. I’m recovering from varicose vein surgery after series of treatments. Hope you have a speedy recovery. Folks: what ever happened to old fashioned family picnics in area parks? We didn’t have outdoor grills in parks like today, usually took cold baked ham or chicken, a salad, etc and lemonaid. Now days people go for takeouts and take a coolbag w/waterbottles which is way more convienent and head out.
Judy says
Gosh, I remember the long summer days as a child— so simple and magical!!! I hope to recreate that for my granddaughters this summer— and for myself!!! :)
Betsy says
Judy, your post brought back memories to me. My dad and a neighbor built us a swimming pool out of a wood frame they made and they used a heavy plastic tarp for lining. My mom froze homemade lemonade into ice cubes for her version of water ice . At night we ran around catching lightning bugs in jars to see the sparkle and then we would let them go. Dinner on the grill and lots of book reading. We had great summer and never felt deprived. Thank you!
Lisa says
Fabulous post. I love Simplify Magazine too by the way – I think it is one of the best digital magazines in existence :) I think this not because I’ve got any authority on the subject matter! I just know it because it’s one of the best inputs into my own life and mindset as a reader. This blog is one of those unique inputs as well :) Each article is like a small nudge towards something more centering and purposeful – towards the true essence of what life is really about amidst this busy cultural noise pit we live in, caught on treadmills and in whirlpools we feel own us. The articles target all of us caught up in the western world with its mindset/trapset of consumerism. This movement towards simplicity is so critical because we are largely completely distracted and off-centre in our trajectory in life – many of us barely have goals other than those set for us by default in our culture. The movement is helping to centre us back to our core purpose as human beings and it’s helping us reset our direction to be more ‘on point’ and focused towards the right targets. If we don’t do this – we mis-spend our lives. We waste our years. We lose our salt. We deprive others less fortunate in the world of our generosity, our ability to contribute to global change, our human kindness. We are literally, tantalising and subtly completely robbed of our purpose and impact. Yet we know it feels wrong somehow. So thanks to the wonderful people leading this movement. It’s clarifying and gentle but also very essential. Many thanks.