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“Contentment is natural wealth, luxury is artificial poverty.” —Socrates
There were many reasons we chose to become minimalist and simplify our lives. We were frustrated with clutter. We discovered the time that was wasted managing our possessions. We realized joy was not found in our possessions. And we determined that we value other things far more than physical belongings. This initial process of simplifying our home required energy, effort, and encouragement.
But the process of remaining minimalist and living this counter-cultural lifestyle against all odds requires something completely different. It requires contentment.
Contentment is the lifeblood of minimalism. And without it, the journey towards minimalism is short-lived. Discontent will always rear its ugly head and become a great obstacle to fully thriving in a simple life.
Not only does contentment provide the opportunity for minimalism, it also reduces your stress level, improves your outlook, relaxes your body, and makes your life enjoyable. There is an unmistakable freedom that accompanies contentment: a freedom to be who you are, enjoy who you are, and live the life you were destined to live.
Yet in our consumeristic-culture where discontent is promoted and material gratification is encouraged, learning to be content can be very difficult. It is certainly a personal journey that we all must travel and nobody’s journey will look the same.
Truly, there is no one-size-fits-all, seven-step program to fully-attain contentment in your life… but below are six keys that have helped us further develop contentment in our lives.
How to Be Content
1. Become grateful. It is impossible to develop contentment without gratitude—they are inseparable. And a grateful person is one who has learned to focus on the good things in their life, not the things they lack.
When you begin to question what you have to be grateful for, start making a list—a literal list of all the good things in your life. Don’t worry about finishing, you don’t need to. The simple discipline of beginning the exercise will undoubtedly shift your focus back to the many good things you already have.
2. Take control of your attitude. A person who lacks contentment in their life will often engage in “when and then thinking” – “when I get _______, then I will be happy.” Instead, take control of your attitude. Remember, your happiness is not reliant on the acquisition of any possession. Your happiness is based solely on your decision to be happy—this may be one of the most important life lessons you can ever learn.
3. Break the habit of satisfying discontentment with acquisitions. For many of us, it has been ingrained into our lives that the proper way to diffuse discontent is to purchase the outward item that is seemingly causing the discontentment. Almost no energy is spent determining the true root of the discontent. Are you dissatisfied with your wardrobe? Go buy new clothes. Not content with your vehicle? Go buy a new one. We have gotten into the habit of satisfying our discontent by simply spending more money.
We must break that habit. Material possessions will never fully satisfy the desires of your heart (that’s why discontent always returns). The next time you recognize discontentment surfacing in your life, refuse to give into that bad habit. Instead, commit to better understand yourself and why the lack of that item is causing discontent. Only after you intentionally break this thinking will true contentment begin to surface.
4. Stop comparing yourself to others. Comparing your life with someone else’s will always lead to discontentment. There will always be people who “appear” to be better off than you and seemingly living the perfect life. But be advised, we always compare the worst of what we know about ourselves to the best assumptions we make about others. Their life is never as perfect as your mind makes it out to be. You are unique. You are special. Your life is different. And it’s always better that way. Prioritize learning how to stop comparing yourself to others.
5. Help others. When you begin helping others, sharing your talents, time and money, you will find yourself learning to be content. The practice will give you a finer appreciation for what you own, who you are, and what you have to offer.
6. Be content with what you have, never with what you are. Never stop learning, growing, or discovering. Take pride in your personhood and the progress that you have made, but never become so content that you cannot find room for improvement. Contentment is not the same as complacency. As soon as you stop growing, you start dying.
***
FAQ About Contentment
What is the definition of contentment?
Contentment is finding joy in what we already have in our lives, feeling or showing satisfaction with our possessions, status, or situation. It’s being happy without trying to find fulfillment in acquiring more material possessions.
What are the benefits of contentment?
Contentment allows us to stop comparing ourselves to others and it allows us to break the cycle of wanting more. It lets us be grateful and happy for all that we have. This approach to life is scientifically proven to reduce your stress level, improve your outlook, relax your body, and make life more enjoyable.
What is the difference between contentment and complacency?
The difference can seem minor but there’s actually a world of difference. Contentment is to be happy with what you have and find satisfaction in your present circumstances. Complacency is being unsatisfied with how your life is in the moment but still being unwilling to make changes to improve your situation.
Is contentment a choice?
Absolutely, although it’s not as easy as it sounds. Contentment comes from a combination of intentional mindset shifts, habit changes, and being aware of our thoughts and actions.
About Joshua Becker
Where to start to minimize my life to the point of maximum fulfillment
Absolutely enjoyed reading it . As a little child or baby life is so simple . For a very old person life is simple . The reality of life , one
breath in and one breath out is also simple . Life really is simple .
Thank you for this very timely reminder. 21st century life can cause us feel driven by so many pressures to perform. It is such a relief and a joy to allow oneself ‘just to be’
Number two really hit home for me today. Thank you for the reminder Joshua!
The heart is built to hunger for God. Without him in ones life, you can never be content. Something will always be missing.
Were meant to love him and be loved by him. He loves you so much he gave his one and only child to die for YOU, so that simply by believing him you will live forever in his love. Pure contentment.
“be careful what you own, it may own you”
very well said , Joshua.
beg yours John.
Love this Joshua!
Changing what you focus on is key! Switching your focus to cultivating Gratitude is the most effective thing for finding more contentment in life!
Here’s another Socrates quote that sums it up nicely.
“He who is not contented with what he has, would not be contented with what he would like to have”
People need to stop filling the voids in their lives with possessions. It’s a battle that can’t be won. I know soo many people who are constantly on the run….avoiding their unhappiness. Instead on dealing with their issues of loneliness.
Nice article, these helps a lot. Specially for item # 1, as I’m writing all the precious things i have in life, realization starts how much I’m blessed.
I will continue to list down all the future good things that i will have in my life.
Contentment is one of the results of a Christ-controlled-life. If it were simply a human quality then people would be content knowing they are going to hell.
I’m content knowing you imagine I’m going to Hell.
Lol. I don’t think we should be including religious beliefs in these posts.
I agree. That would be a good sign of contentment :-)
Minimalism is way to live a simple live. Everyone try to live a simple life but they unable to follow the rules of simple or minimalism life. If you want to start a minimalism life start with less and slow, if you will start this things then it became a habit and then you can live a beautiful and happy life.
Joshua, thank you for all of your inspiring messages. I always feel very encouraged after reading your posts. They’re always very positive and uplifting. Thanks and keep it up!
Gratitude and faith are two concepts I try to focus on daily. This post applies not just to minimalism but to all facets of living a more intentional and skillful life.
Number is 6 is my favorite of the 6. You hit right on, again.
Thank you for the reminder.
“Never become so content that you cannot find room for improvement” funny how you speak to so many people, and each of us walk away with a different treasure : ) Have a great day Mr. Becker
Thank´s again <3
Thank you, Joshua for your great posts! I live in Kenya, and as with a lot of other cultures, success is considered to be a function of how much one owns. Whenever I try sharing some of the ideas from your blog, I get funny stares. Coming from a culture of want, nobody really wants to be told to be content with less. It is considered unambitious and a waste of talent to live with less.
However, your blog really inspires me to continue on this journey, as I learn to be content with less. And not just because I cannot afford it, but because of the freedom of living simply.
Thanks and keep up the good work!
Joshua, I have been following your blog and I truly do appreciate your articles and advice. Your articles have led me to a path towrds minimalism. Despite many changes and personal growth I am having difficulty attaining what I want most and what I believe almost all of us want. Number 2 on this article and in many other articles you say happiness is a decision and a choice. I am very greatful for my loved ones and blessings and I truly try to be happy. I am involved in my community and often volunteer in various charities. However despite this, I feel an emptiness inside. It is very difficult to explain. I am a religious person and do have an active prayer life so this is not the “void” that only God can fill as many would describe. This emptiness is of a different nature. I believe it has to do with a break up over 2 years ago. Since then I have never been able to get in to another relationship. Have you or anyone here felt this emptiness? Is there a cure? Thank you for any help.
Lucas, I would recommend seeing a Christian counselor. A minister often offers free counseling and provides the opportunity to talk about what it is that is making you feel empty. If you find someone, who is a good listener, you can often figure it out on your own. They also can offer helpful advice. I would like to add to the blog. Happiness is fleeting and is a byproduct of the circumstances in life. Regardless of making a choice to be happy, we can feel empty inside when we are lonely, have lost a job, a best friend, etc…However, joy is a worthy choice to pursue and joy is more consistent than happiness. Joy is a result of the choices we make like deciding to do the right thing. Also, remember that feelings are a result of our thought process. Think good things and that empty feeling should begin to dissipate. Don’t be a victim of your thoughts, but take captive every thought and make it obedient to Christ (2 Cor. 10:5).
You may be experiencing some form of depression. While we can choose our responses to situations in life, some may cause physiological changes that we need to rewire. Note that I am not saying such situations inherently need medication. I’m just saying that they may require counseling or therapy to address. It may be something you cannot address with prayer alone, and there’s no shame in that. The gods and goddesses call people to be therapists so they can help people.
I look at this as a journey with a very long term destination. I don’t give myself grades on my “success” I just keep trying to clean up the issues.
“As soon as you stop growing, you start dying.”
This is the best quote! I will start using this as my mantra to continue my quest for lifelong learning. Thanks!
Joshua,
I wanted to comment about practicing “Gratitude” . The discipline of making a gratitude list every day for the past 3 years has significantly shifted my life. During a particularly challenging portion of my life I was spiritually and financially broken. I was riddled with guilt that my children would “do without”. I began a daily emailed gratitude list.
A transformation has taken place, I see and appreciate thinks I never even paid attention to, much less took the time to enjoy. Over and over my faith has been restored as I always “have what I need for today” My relationship with my children has clarity and much more communication.
I did get to see you speak in Gretna, Nebraska recently.
I am grateful for that.
NikkiZ
I went to a home yesterday that family just moved into. Huge home and lots if stuff. A part of me wanted to cry because my house is so small. They were showing off everything and I felt the green eyed monster rear her head.
Then I realized that none of the other people there live in a McMansion like that. We were the normal ones and I felt better.
“Contentment is not the same as complacency.” This was so important for me to “hear”… Thank you!
This was just what I was needing today. I’ve been having issues with ‘smaller living’ and ‘less stuff’ envy recently. I’ve been getting increasingly frustrated that my decluttering doesn’t seem to be moving along at the pace I’d like and on top of that my husband and children aren’t really interested in reducing their stuff any further. Some days it feels like I’m drowning in everyone else’s stuff. So from today I’m going to start writing down the things that I’m grateful for and try to keep a record of how far we have actually come in the last year. I wish I’d taken photos of before to compare with now but I can still take them now to remind me in the future. Thanks for this post :)
“we always compare the worst of what we know about ourselves to the best assumptions that we make about others”…… That is SO true yet I have never thought of it that way. Thank you for another great post.
You should be content with what you are. That last bit is bad advice. The rest is great.
I read a quote from Joel Osteen about being grateful. It said something like, someone on earth would gladly trade places with you, right where you are. Thank God for everything you have. This post was fantastic (as always) and the other one you wrote about life not being perfect. These are two things I am trying to stay aware of. It is amazing how God puts things like this right in front of you because it is what He wants us to understand and get. Thanks again. :)
Erich Fromm, author of “To Have or To Be?” asks, “If I am what I have and what I have is lost, who then am I?”
To exist in the “having” mode is never the path to contentment (regardless of what our culture might suggest!) It is, rather, in the “being” mode where we should seek to live our lives, and adopting a minimalist mindset is certainly a good example of this! :-)
So needed this today…Thanks
I believe I have been enlightened by the minimalist way of living and thinking and am grateful for your many insightful posts and guest bloggers input. I am not particularly concerned I will relapse into “conspicuous consumption” BUT it is disheartening seeing people I know and love suffer over never having enough and wanting more and more. I guess I am looking for ways to help enlighten others – this “minimalist mentality” feels SO GOOD—I want others to share in the contentment.
I like how you written that is great post. When you enjoy your life without consumer hysteria you feel more fulfilled.
Thank you, Josh.
Thank you, Josh, for your support and encouragement in my journey
“Be Content with what you have; rejoice in the way things are. When you realize there is nothing lacking, the whole world belongs to you.”
Lao Tzu
I am so glad you posted this truth. Without the foundation of contentment, we can’t be content even as a minimalist. I am reminded of a greater truth in 1 Timothy 6:6.
I have often held that wisdom lies in contentment, and there is no contentment in acquisition of “stuff”, it just always begs for more. I am not saying per se that everyone should become minimalists, but it certainly is difficult for a rich man (one with many possessions) to be truly content, and in such a case it is better to get rid of it all, and discover that one can live with the barest minimum (isn’t that a good definition of minimalism?)
I particularly promote the view that we live the way we do because of what were “sold” on. This means that we really do not decide for ourselves what lifestyle, philosophy or goals we want to buy for ourselves (much less what products or services we use). There is a great conspiracy to market a very limited perspective to us. Freedom means leaving this limited scope behind, becoming purpose driven and taking control of our destiny.
For some this may mean traditional success, but for others it would mean a new and idiosyncratic life design. How much richer would this world be if we each followed our own vision, and how much more content would we be if we no longer measured ourselves by the world’s standard and tried to keep up with the Jones’s? When we are fulfilled in ourselves, anything we do or have will add to that, and conversely – if we are not, all will add to our frustration and discontent.
Fantastic article. Thank you.
I’m a minimalist by nature. I like everything streemlined and matching. Clutter overwhelms me. We are definatly a family with less (except by quanity of children, haha!) and do prefer the minimalist life.
Ive enjoyed all if your posts but taking particularly good advise away from this one. I often find myself playing the comparison game. Ill be making my “grateful list” today. What a wonderful reminder of the many areas of our lives we are blessed. Another is quality not quantity. I tend to buy what is on sale and not what we truely want/need. Thinking if I can impliment that it will make a big difference.
Thank you for the guidance and encouragment to improve!
Hi Joshua
I hope you dont mind that I haver used your image?
http://beyondmaterialism-john.blogspot.com/2010/10/who-wants-to-be-zeroaire-i-do.html
Warmest wishes
John
I can not quote chapter and verse but there is a Blibical scripture that says, “I have learned in whatsoever state I am, there with to be content.
Philippians 4:12
thank you for your inspiring blog!
Great post – I’m just starting on this road. We’re burb-dwellers, too, only out here in the midwest.
My original goal was to get rid of half of everything. It’s a job, but it’s paying off BIG TIME.
For me, #1 and #6 are perfect bookends. Be grateful for what you have, but never stop learning and growing. I’ve been practicing a daily gratitude session for about a year now and I love how much it relaxes me. I have such a sense of calm that enables me to learn and grow with a much clearer head.
Awesome post!
great article!
i think #4 is key
i like the redesign also
:)
great, i really needed to read this this week.
i wonder have you considered doing a spin-off blog, on the same areas of contentment, simplicity etc but with more emphasis on the faith/christianity side of things?
Jonny,
I think Joshua is already doing that!
This is a great post, so much that I agree with, especially “contentment is the lifeblood of minimalism”
Sometimes I feel like there’s an element of the simplicity/minimalism movement that can have a sort of reverse discontentment, too. Where most people are discontent about not having stuff, they are just as discontent about having stuff.
Like when you said, “when i get _______, then i will be happy”, their’s would read, “when declutter” or “when I get down to 100 or 50 things, then I will be happy.”
It’s not true with more stuff, and it’s not true with less stuff, either. So I guess what I’m saying is that contentment is totally a matter of the heart, and you can have a discontent heart, no matter how much stuff you have.
Good stuff!
Thanks for that thought…it’s something I’ve been struggling with lately. I know a clutter free environment makes me feel more peaceful, but sometimes I get frustrated with the process and the slowness of my progress.
I have gotten rid of most of my knick knacks and still feel ‘cluttered’. I give up. My kids are raised so there are only dog toys, leashes, dog meds floating around. The goldfish pond which was supposed to be an enjoyable hobby is always green. It had about 500 tadpoles and baby fish so I didn’t want to clean it. The patio table is constantly accumulating things that I use throughout the day. (citronella candles, watering can for the flowers, bug repellant, coffee cup) pfft. It never ends. The coffee table has dog ointments, dog ear drops, a one dollar bill, a pack of buttons that came with a winter coat (it is summer, i don’t know why they are there), a bottle of lotion, a 7up can, a ponytail holder and a hair clip. I cleaned it off yesterday. I am hopeless. Someone gave us a huge bag of corn so that is on the stove. Where are you supposed to put corn anyway? I am so tired. oh, and the dog hair. How could I forget the dog hair?
One thing that really helped me was learning to do all tasks that take a minute or less. Like putting the ointment back where it belongs. I too am guilty of having a table with too many miscellaneous things on it. But the one minute rule really helps. When I make tea, I clean the pot right then. So at the end of the day, I only have a few dishes to contend with,.
Thanks, great motivational post. Sometimes we need a reminder that the moment we live in is now, and the only time we can be happy is now!
#1 and #5 resonate most with me.
About a year ago, I actually started a “thankful blog”. The idea was to post one thing a day I was thankful for…it has revolutionized my thinking, and I find myself reflecting throughout the day what I am particularly thankful for.
And when we open ourselves up to helping others, it nurtures an attitude of thankfulness for what we have been blessed with.
Great post. I agree with it so much. I have found contentment in my relationship with God and the rest falls into place. My worth, success or lack of, my future, and who I am do not depend on things. They come from my relationship with God. Out of that contentment in Him comes the freedom to be who I am and to not need the “things.”
I wholeheartedly agree Deb!
“Godliness with contentment is great gain. ” 1 Timothy 6:6
Joshua, thanks for this – especially #2 and #3. Great reminders as I begin my week!