Years ago, while scrolling through Facebook, I read something posted by Sarah Peck. And I’ve never forgotten it.
Sarah is one of the most encouraging people I know online and she always makes me smile. Her post was a simple, life-changing thought:
“Facebook ‘likes’ are free. It doesn’t cost you anything to hand them out. So go for it.”
Sarah was offering a quick commentary on how we use Facebook. It doesn’t cost anything to click “like” on somebody’s photo, status update, or new Group page. So do it. I mean, why not? Be an encouragement to someone by clicking the like button (and now the “love” or “wow” button). You’re already scrolling through Facebook anyway.
Her simple post changed how I use Facebook. I used to just scroll and scan, but now I click “like.” It’s a simple way to tell somebody that you noticed them. The same principle applies to Instagram and Twitter and Snapchat and Youtube.
It also applies to podcasts and books and apps. In fact, one of the most important things you can do for a podcaster, author, or app developer is leave a positive review on their product. That’s why, if you interact at all online, you have almost certainly been asked to leave a review. Those are important—and again, totally free to hand out.
If you enjoy a podcast or new app, leave a positive review. If you read a good book, leave a 5-star review on Amazon or Barnes and Noble. If you read a blog post, leave a comment or share it. These simple actions cost nothing, take only seconds to complete, and provide valuable encouragement to the author/creator. It’s a simple act with a huge impact.
And in an Internet world with so much negativity, shouldn’t we be passing out as much positivity as possible? (tweet that)
Of course, Sarah’s advice extends far beyond social media. Perhaps, even more importantly, her thoughts extend to our in-person relationships as well.
Compliments are free. It costs us literally nothing to use kind words. So why not use them as much as possible?
It’s nice to receive long, thoughtful, drawn-out compliments, but not every kind word needs to be this way. Sometimes just one short sentence can be enough to change the entire course of somebody’s day:
- “You did a good job.”
- “It’s nice to see you.”
- “That’s really funny.”
- “You are so thoughtful.”
- “You are one of the kindest people I know.”
- “I’m glad I get to work with you.”
- “You look really nice today.”
- “You always brighten my day.”
- “I’m proud of you son.”
Each of these compliments take only seconds. And they don’t cost anything to hand out. So just go for it.
In a world full of negativity, everybody can use a little more positivity in their lives.
Besides, you are a beautiful person. And a compliment from you would mean more than you know.
Carina says
What a wonderful post! I completely agree with its message, and I give sincere (not contrived) compliments to people all of the time (I have always done this, even when I was little. I would notice something positive or special, and I would let the person know). It’s honest encouragement, so why not? We can all use a little encouragement now and then.
Nicole says
I’m a long time reader, but this post inspired me to comment for the first time to thank you for your uplifting blog! It has given me a lot of inspiration over the past 2 years.
Malin says
Great reminder for the rest of ones life!
Hannah Kenway says
This is such a good reminder, it’s a wonderful habit to cultivate and a way of touching so many people. In the UK we tend to be so “closed” and self protective – it helps nobody.
Thank you for this – and wonderful blog!
Greg Kamphuis says
A few years ago I noticed that the same people were always liking and commenting on my stuff and I started really liking those people, then I thought, why am I not that person? It actually makes me more happy day to day too. Also, thanks for calling me beautiful , that was sweet !
Melissa says
Joshua,
I think it’s easier to remember the kind words in real life. Not enough people follow through and offer a quick comment or a “like” when they come across something online that helps them or just makes them feel good. It is important. You never know when you might make someone’s day, and the positivity just keeps spreading. A simple, lovely post… Thank you.
Blake says
You did a good job on this post. Thanks! :)
Jeffrey Pillow says
Thich Nhat Hanh discusses watering the seeds of positivity in another person in an effort to make these seeds grow and bloom. We all have these seeds in us. Sometimes they experience a drought, however.
It’s a lesson, much like what you share here (give compliments), that goes a very long way whether we realize it or not. For example, my wife has a very stressful job and likely receives secondary emotional trauma as a result. She is a counselor. I said to her this morning, you have a big heart. And yesterday, you eased someone’s suffering.
The seeds of negativity are constantly watered in our world. We must all make a point to water the seeds of positivity — in ourselves, in others.
I enjoyed this post.
Thank you for writing it.
Judy says
Jeffrey, I give your wife a lot of credit. That must be rough—having to hear the details of someone’s pain and trauma. 4-sure she is making a difference in this world by easing the troubled hearts of others. It takes a special person to do that— I’m not sure I’d be able to “leave it at the office”. I have an over-abundant amount of empathy and I hurt deeply when others suffer, especially children. It cuts me to the core.
Jeffrey Pillow says
And her focus is children, too, from mostly impoverished neighborhoods in the city where we live. That’s the thing. Unless we live it, it’s hard to fathom what some children go through: violence in the home; physical, sexual, and verbal abuse et al. Homelessness. Foster care. No dinner, or at best, cereal for dinner.
A kind word and showing another you care goes farther than we think.
Ann Harrison says
I understand that very well. When I hear of a child being hurt, it tears me apart. It’s greate to receive encouragement.
Erica says
So, I am taking your advice because your article really blessed me today. Thank you! We forget these simple principles so easily. Thanks for the reminder!
Pumpkin Pie says
Joshua. I have appreciated your blog for years now. I have never had that much clutter, except perhaps books. But your blog certainly helped me purge as I sorted through my mother’s possessions and made room for some of her stuff in my home. And your posts are oddly both relaxing and energizing to read! Thanks so much for being there for us.