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There is a quote from Seth Godin I love to post in the Becoming Minimalist Facebook group. It goes like this:
Instead of wondering when your next vacation is, maybe you should set up a life you don’t need to escape from.
The quote is appreciated by most people who see it. But there are always a few (on any quote that I post) who want to disagree, dissent, and argue with the sentiment.
In this particular case, they comment that vacations are fun and traveling is good. Both of which I do not disagree with. The point of the quote is not whether vacations are fun and traveling is good.
The point of the quote is rather than only enjoying our life while on vacation, holiday, or weekend, we should strive to make our lives the ones we want to be living—every day of the week.
We should learn how to enjoy life on a daily basis.
Rather than seeing vacation as your annual opportunity to escape life… craft a life you don’t need to escape from.
This is not necessarily easy to do. But it is entirely possible. In fact, for the most part, I have done this with my life. I love and enjoy my every day. I don’t count the days until the weekend, I enjoy Monday as much as I do Saturday.
How to Enjoy Life
Here are nine ways to begin crafting a life you don’t need to escape:
1. Make Relationships a Priority.
The old adage is quite true, “There is only one happiness in this life, to love and be loved.” Loving relationships bring a joy into our lives that can never be matched by income, title, or career achievements. People matter and are worth the effort. It is important to notice in the adage above that several types of relationships are important to our well-being. One, where we are being loved by another. And a second, where we are pouring out love. Work to have both.
2. Remove Unneeded Possessions from Your Home and Life.
Physical possessions are a burden to us. They require time, energy, money, and always distract us from the things in life that matter most. It is difficult to fully appreciate how much of a burden our possessions have become until we begin to remove them. Contrary to what advertisers shout from the rooftop, more stuff will not make you happy. Quite the opposite is true. The first step in crafting the life you want is to get rid of everything you don’t.
3. Make Your Work Your Job.
Vicki Robin, in the first issue of Simple Money Magazine (which you can download for free) draws a helpful distinction between “work” and “job.” Your job, she would say, is what you do for money to provide shelter, clothing, and food. Your work, on the other hand, is what you do to contribute to others, the causes you are passionate about, and the good you wish to bring into this world. When your work is also your job, you have achieved a sweet spot in life.
4. Or, See Your Job as Part of Your Work.
Of course, #3 above is not always possible for all people. Sometimes, our work does not provide financial compensation and pursuing our passion as a career is not always feasible. Still other times, because of the immediacy of life’s demands, we are required to do the job in front of us for the sake of providing for those who are counting on us. In those cases, there is still opportunity to craft a life you do not need to escape from. But it requires us to rethink the nature of our job by focusing on the good that it brings into the world and recognizing how it aligns with our work in other ways.
5. Guard Your Time.
Not every pursuit in life deserves your energy. It is important for each of us to become more aware of what is truly worth the hours of our one, short, important life. Those who have crafted a life they love have not done so by saying “yes” to every opportunity or invitation in their inbox. They have done so by guarding their time ruthlessly for the things that matter most and by learning to say “no” graciously to the others.
6. Take Care of Yourself.
There is little joy in a selfish life focused entirely on self. What matters at the end of our life is not the house we lived in, the car we drove, or the possessions we purchased. What will matter in the end is how we treated others. Keep selfless living the goal of life. However, an empty cup cannot pour into another. If we are going to live selfless lives (the true measure of success), we must learn that caring for ourselves is the first step in caring for others. Rest, exercise, and pursue healthy habits… we need you to be the best version of yourself.
7. Appreciate Your Season in Life.
Just as seasons of the year come and go, so do seasons of life. We’re kids, in college, young adults, newly married, raising children, empty-nesters, grandparents, caring for aging parents, being cared for ourselves… or any combination of the seasons above. Those who are most satisfied with life are those who appreciate the current season of life they are in and learn to make the most of it. They do not long for the next one or attempt to continue living in the previous one. They accept the reality of changing seasons and embrace each one with grace and resolve.
8. Understand the Reality of Trials in Life.
Every person in life is either in the middle of a trial, has just emerged from one, or is heading toward the next. Trials and storms come and go—sometimes as a result of our own poor decisions and sometimes as the result of living in an imperfect world. Trials often become the very thing we most wish to escape in life—sometimes for good reason. But given the nature of their constant existence, how can we learn to appreciate the life we have in the midst of these trials? First, we embrace the reality of their existence. And second, we look for the good in the midst of them (no matter how hard we need to look).
9. Find Happiness in Your Every Day.
Happiness is not something to be pursued, it is something to be discovered and recognized. If you are expecting to find happiness after _____ changes, you will never discover it. The hardest truth to grasp about happiness is also the most promising: It can be experienced each day regardless of your current lot in life. As Thomas Kinkade once said, “True simplicity begins when you learn to enjoy the amazing abundance of what is already yours.”
If you want to learn how to enjoy life and craft something you do not need to escape from, you can do so. It may require you to change your mindset, your pursuits, or where you focus your energy, but it is always worth it.
Mari Paw says
I don’t believe it is necessary to say, oh what first world problems do we have here, how silly when you compare this to third world countries. Countries who are not first world have their own challenges for sure, but that doesn’t take away from the challenges and struggles of people who live in first world countries, where only the 1% is rich remember? The middle class is disappearing in the cost of living crisis and high housing prices, and the things mentioned in the article really is a challenge for a lot of people in a high-pressured, high-demand, high-capitalist and consumeristic society. Sure, there is a lot to be grateful for living in a first world country, but it doesn’t mean that everything be is perfect honkey dorey, and comparing ourself to a country where there is war etc doesn’t make us feel any less pressure or part of the rat race. That said, of course I an grateful not to live in a war-torn country, I just don’t think we need to have a scarcity mindset where because one struggle is worse, you try to invalidate the struggle of what is not as bad, but still not great.
Brian says
I think for some, too much revolves around the next big”getaway”. Sometimes alot of planning, money and stress goes into a vacation. Shouldn’t it really be about the time itself? Whether its to be spent with family, friend or by yourself! I get the author’s point. Try to enjoy as much time as possible in life. You only get so much of it.
Jennifer Skjakerda says
Pointers are only applicable to folks who live in first-world areas, who don’t have the burdens of living in a third-world country where they’re forced to endure and scrape just to survive.
Lucky are those whose problems are just these menial things in the article.
Judy k says
Jennifer, I have heard many stories countless times from people who have gone to third world counties with the intention of helping the people and making their lives better. They always come back w the same story- the people in those countries change their lives and view point. They are always amazed at how these people have almost nothing compared to our standards – but live in the present and are so much more happy than we are on a day-to-day basis. Not saying people everywhere do not have their own daily struggles, but sometimes having less is more.
Darlene says
Truth! :)
Chitra says
Hello Josh,
While all viewpoints are accurate and I enjoy your writing , please consider cross referencing ancient Vedanta teachings. Spiritual evolution and eternal principles of life were documented in Indian philosophy & translated from Sanskrit into English volumes. Eg. Vedanta Treatise
Minimalism has been a central theme in that philosophy.
Garima Dubey says
I really admire the way you pen down your thoughts and beliefs regarding minimalist approach. I feel less burdened since I started implementation of principles related to minimalism in my life. Thank you.
Shelly Todd says
I’ve read several of your articles now and love them but keep hitting a wall with what is summed up here in #5 nicely – Guard Your Time. How do we/ I do that as a family now a days? Growing up we did sports/ dance after school and were home most nights for dinner and homework. Now it’s a constant running around even though our kids are only allowed to be doing one sport/ activity each. Dance is the worst – she is there almost every night because the classes for her age level aren’t on the same day plus her age (12/13) is always at dinner time (6ish) so youngers can come after school. Plus there is constant “volunteering” demanded and right now we are dealing with the Christmas recital and all the extra practices that go with it (the recital isn’t a choice – the whole studio participates). My only options seem to have to be to tell my child she can’t do dance any more but she loves the classes and, as homeschoolers, it is her social time also. This is also true of the sport my son is in (fencing). Now a days, all sports seem very time consuming and it seems that they (the coaches?) don’t take into account that you may have other children or – hmmm, gee, other obligations. Any ideas? How have others dealt with this highly stressful family time drain? How do you say no and not have it taken out on your child (this happens, believe me!) Thanks for any ideas!
Karen says
I remember those frantic, overscheduled years & how the days, months & years sped by too quickly with work, competitive sports, church & the arts…those were after full school schedules & deadlines. When your child is on the “college track” these are requirements for their resumes. Finally we crashed….physically & mentally by the end of high school….sports were abandoned due to burnout, injury & kids realigning their lives & priorities. Thankfully both are now successful, fulfilled adults who appreciate a slower, more relaxed life. Don’t get sucked into the vortex of college prep….they’re only kids once.
Ram lal says
I feel that I’m waisting my time on mobile phone.
SUSAN DYE HILL says
The most important thing that I learned as a working mother of three is how to say “No.” Don’t explain, other than to say “I have other obligations.” This gave me back time to go to college and finish my degree. No to PTA, no to bake sales, no to any other extracurricular activities. My oldest was in band and I went to his events when I could. My middle child was in scouts and I arranged with anothe parent to be his transportation. My youngest did dance for a while, then soccer for a while. I went to her recitals and many of her games. I also insisted that my husband did his fair share of transportation.
Laura says
Are there other parents in the same boat? Maybe you could all coordinate a drop off/pick up schedule and take turns?
Amy says
I’m in the same boat with rep sports. My kids both play and love the sports and the friends they’ve made. It’s a daily commitment to a team so they must attend. Usually they are keen to go but sometimes would rather relax. However, we’ve noticed when they have a few days off they’re missing their sport or friends. Lol. We try to balance as much as we can but I think it’s just going to be our reality for the next few years.
Katy Biggs says
When you have a family it’s hard to guard personal time. Thus I choose to be single and without kids. My mom was a chauffeur for 18 years running three kids to lessons and events. This happens to most moms. I won’t give up my life this way.
ET says
belated reply but couldn’t resist. So you are home all day with your kids and homeschooling schedule but then expect regular school personnel to accommodate to your wishes???
Natasha says
Vacations are a great way to reset….travel opens one’s eyes. Everyone should travel to another country/area/state and see how other people live. The problems we have now are people are way too myopic. They only see what is around THEM. Use vacations to see how others live…I love my life, my home…but I can’t wait to travel ….I love the feeling, I love meeting people, seeing beautiful places. Nothing wrong with looking forward to that.
Ram lal says
Really vacation are great.??