Editor’s Note: This is a guest post from Jeff Goins of Goins Writer.
In our world today, we are overwhelmed with promises to quit our jobs and chase our dreams. We are told that we deserve to be happy and that if we buy enough things that it will eventually happen. We are told to work for the weekend and plan that next vacation. But why can’t we be happy with the life we have right now?
We live in a culture that prizes leisure over labor and longs for a “four-hour work week.” Sadly, like many things in our culture, this promise is an illusion. The truth is you don’t have to hate your job. Work can become a source of fulfillment for you if you choose to see it that way.
For my recent book The Art of Work, I interviewed hundreds of people who had discovered their purpose in life. And as I spoke with these people who had found their callings I learned several lessons. Here are three of them.
1. Hating your job won’t make you any happier.
We don’t have to hate the work we do even if that work isn’t ideally suited to us. Everyone I met who found their calling in life ended up doing something that surprised them. Which means that connecting to your purpose is more about perspective than circumstance.
During World War II, Austrian psychiatrist Viktor Frankl discovered an important lesson about human happiness: “When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.”
Frankl learned this from living for years in a Nazi concentration camp. Everything was taken from him. His family. His work. His well-being. And yet he realized there was one freedom he could never lose: his.
If you choose to change your perspective, how things look will begin to change. You don’t need to win the lottery to find contentment. In fact, sometimes the very things we think will liberate us will actually only further prison us.
The easiest way to do work you love is to start loving what you do. This is a choice we all have. So let’s stop making work the enemy.
2. Do better work and the work will become more enjoyable.
One way to enjoy your work is to become better at it. It should be no surprise that we find greater fulfillment in activities that we are skilled at doing. But how much this is true is startling.
Laura Carstensen is a psychologist and the director of the Stanford Center on Longevity where they study what makes people live longer and happier lives. What they found was that people who continue to learn enjoy their work more and actually live longer.
Education, according to this study, is the single greatest predictor of lifespan. So you want to live longer? Be happier? Learn a new skill or get better at the one you have. And why not start with the place where you probably already spend eight hours a day?
Once we reach a basic level or proficiency, work that was once tedious may now be enjoyable. As Daniel Pink writes in his book Drive, mastering any skill makes the activity intrinsically more motivating. So if you are struggling to want to go to work in the first place, try doing better work.
3. Realize your whole life is a form of work.
Whether or not you have a day job, you go to work every day. You watch the kids or clean up the house. You mow the lawn or go grocery shopping. Every day, you are working, whether it’s at an office or at home. Whether you are retired or just beginning your career.
We all have important work to do. And that work is our life. Your magnum opus is not just one great thing you did. It is more like a body of work that you are constantly contributing to every day.
In that respect, we all get to decide what kind of job we have and how much we enjoy it. Of course, there are some things that are within our control, like our perspective, and some things that are not, like our circumstances. Your job is to learn to let go of what you can’t control and embrace what you can.
One important lesson about being happier with your life and work is learning to make trade-offs. It’s the dream of many people to want more of everything. More money. More stuff. More time. But you can’t have all three of those all at once.
So decide what’s most important to you. You can do almost anything you want in life but not everything. If you’re not doing what you want, you can quit. But that choice has consequences. You can stay where you are and there is a cost to that as well. One choice isn’t necessarily better than the other, so long as you realize you can’t have it all right now.
There is, however, something beautiful about not getting everything you thought you wanted. Constraints create contentment. Because in those constraints you realize what’s really important.
—
Jeff Goins is the author of four books including the national best seller, The Art of Work. You can find him on Twitter or follow his award-winning writing blog.
These are great points Jeff! If there is no part of your job that you enjoy, you either need to figure out how to transform it into something positive or look for something new. Too many people waste their time doing something they hate, instead of trying to create a life worthy of their time.
Exactly! Well said.
i personally have always felt. that is one dose not have a passion for the wk or job you hold. it’s not worth it to stay there, find a job you love,,,, better for you health and your life,… happy days
When I was young, I thought I was constrained by my circumstances. I learned over time however, I was constrained by my choices but attributed them to my circumstances. I choose to live consciously and work to inspire my clients to do the same. Mary @OrganizedYou
Beautiful. Well said, Mary! I love that. Thank you for sharing.
Love!
Love right back at ya!
I appreciate your thoughts. I posted about mindset this morning on my blog as discovering that my attitude and core beliefs were one of the most significant determinants of my happiness and life satisfaction. I am aiming for a four day work week for my business even though I love it because I also love time to rest and connect with my family and prepare real food and maintain an orderly, peaceful home:)
Well, four days is different from four hours. Good for you! :)
What was the link to that post?
http://www.alifeinprogress.ca/?p=1946
Great post Jeff!
What an incredible quote from Victor Frankl.
He’s the best.
My wife and I have a terrific quote framed in our bedroom: “Having it all doesn’t necessarily mean having it all at once.” Discovering what you enjoy doing, and improving over time, trumps superficial pleasures.
Love that John.
Really powerful post! I agree that the four-hour work week and dream job that so many are chasing is mostly mythical. I especially love your last point–that if we strive for contentment in all we do and view all we do as valuable, then we can find joy and significance in life, whatever our day job might be. I know it has helped me during stressful times at work to look at the bigger picture of my life and all the good that was going on.
Well even if they aren’t mythical. They won’t make you happy. Only you can do that.
good article!!!!!!
Great read! I am fortunate to have found a place where I love my job and am passionate about the services we provide… I have 4 co-workers who share my belief. I have 2 that make going to work challenging…I try to keep things in perspective. I can’t change them, but I can change how I deal with them. Any advice on how to deal with the chronic complainers and joy-suckers at an otherwise great job?
Rachel, I’ve worked for the past 13 years with a joy-sucker. They never change ( you already know that ) . What I’ve learned to do is minimize the time I spend with her…if that is possible.
That’s a wise strategy, Judy.
Thought-provoking post! Hating our job is only going to make us more miserable. Either change the situation or accept it.
Yep. That’s what I’m saying. :)
This reminds me of a blog post I did about Finding My Niche. I was too focused about where I ‘should’ be at this point in my life instead of realizing how much purpose, responsibility and stability I had where I ‘already was’. I learned not to use where others were as a benchmark of my success or failure. I’m now perfectly content with still working a full time job and running my own business part time, not one bit bitter or resentful that I had not been able to give up my job in order to be my own boss. With my job, I have a steady paycheck, paid medical, paid vacation, paid sick time, bonuses and a boss who is awesome. It would be a gamble giving all that up to venture out on my own. It just was not financially wise.
I instead exchanged the ‘where I should be by now’ mindset into building my purpose for ‘where I currently am’. I’m very much content and at peace with it. It’s my niche. My purpose. What I’m meant to do, which is both. Once I changed my mindset, the bitterness and resentfulness went away, and so did the stress
Now off to get your book for my plane ride next month!
Oh, fun! Thanks! What’s the link to that post?
I like the perspective that everything we do is work. And that is not a bad thing. As a homeschool mom, my work never ends. It is up to me what attitude I approach that work with. I am inspired by your post to get better at what I do.
That’s true. Hardest but most rewarding job in the world right there. Thanks for the work you do, Tracy!
Hi, Jeff, great to see you here. I’m inspired by your work from your books and blogs. In fact, you inspired me a lot to become a writer.
And your article here is very informative and helpful. I can’t agree more when you say do better work and the work will become more enjoyable. I found that whenever I published some very quality content, and people love it, I felt fulfilled and enjoyed the reward. I will enjoy the process even more, the next time.
Again, thanks for sharing and I’m looking forward to talking to you more. :)
I love that, Shawn! Good for you.
Nice one!
Especially those three lines at the end of the post:
“There is, however, something beautiful about not getting everything you thought you wanted. Constraints create contentment. Because in those constraints you realize what’s really important.”
It’s a very good read!!
Thanks for reading!
A job is enjoyable when its purpose far exceeds the paycheck we receive. All the money in the world cannot make a job without purpose enjoyable.
Agreed. Well said, Mark.
Living simply and encouraging others to do the same will change the nature of work.
I think the employer attitude shifted. Way back when unemployment rates were low employers had a hard time finding the quality employees they needed so they were very nice to the ones they had. When the unemployment rate rose to bad levels employers could hire among many qualified applicants and their attitude towards their employees became dismal. Lately I have worked for two employers of whom I have no respect as a person. Employer attitude is probably why many now dislike their employers and their jobs and I would expect productivity to also drop as a result. Now as employment rates are getting better. Those good hard working qualified people looking for work now are being turned down because employer attitude is running behind the curve. The employers who treat their people right and have had respect for their employees should be the ones to collect a good work base and prosper in the years to come if employment continues to improve. Their are some nasty employers out there right now.
Brent, I had a great job that I loved. Corporate hired an insane boss. Literally. He was either on drugs— or badly needed some. I left there because of management. I’m glad I did…because the job I have now is even better…but I totally get how awful it is to work for a bad employer. ——Eventually, he just stopped showing up and walked off with all the money in the safe and cash registers…never to be found again. He skipped out on his rent too, and all his belongings ended up on his front lawn. The store closed down altogether about a year after I left. The stories I could tell you!!! This guy was downright scary @@
I wonder what his deal was!!!
Although this is a well-written piece, it doesn’t take into account that for many people, they LOVE their jobs and find a great sense of purpose from them, but they work in a toxic environment with petty tyrants who rob them of their pleasure. People quit bosses, not jobs. Also, Michael Argyle finds that life satisfaction is highly correlated with work satisfaction. In other words, if you are generally a happy person, then you will tend to be happy with your work.
Good point, MC. Thanks for sharing!
Great article. The key points are spot on for me. Helpful and informative since I work from home and had to manage may actual work and work at home :|
I love my job, I just hate the people there.
Sorry to hear that. People are an important part of most jobs and enjoying your work.
Currently I am a mom full-time. A friend recently commented how she was working to change her attitude by saying “I get to do laundry and dishes and cooking for my family” instead of “I have to …” I have now taken this one step further to “I choose to do these things to serve my family” and it makes quite a difference in how I feel about what I know I am called to do.
And on the improving aspect, I was thinking of learning a musical instrument and trying new recipes!
Thanks for the thoughts and ideas!
Absolutely! This shift in mindset can help us live with far more joy.
Love that perspective!
It’s a shame that John Keynes wasn’t right about the 15 hour week prediction: https://www.theguardian.com/business/2008/sep/01/economics because the technology is there for us to all be doing just that (if Capitalism hadn’t taken over and created the 1%)
I work 20 hours a week now (it took nearly 20 years of working full-time & paying off the house before I could do it) and I can definitely say that a 4 hour day is so much healthier.
It’s a shame young people (here in the UK) won’t be able to do what I did (leave school & get a job at 16) because now we force them all to go to uni till they’re 21, & leave with at least £45K of debt. No chance of getting a mortgage paid off, or out of debt for them. So sad.
This is fascinating!
I like the last point that our life is some sort of work. We were built to work whether it’s as parents, salesmen, or farmers. Vocation comes along with being a human & everybody has different talents. The tricky part is some vocations & talents are valued higher than others, and we get stuck in the wealth trap (myself included) and settle for jobs that pay the bills to afford life.
That’s well said.
So many jobs seem miserable. My Dad spent 35 years in corporate finance and was stressed out all the time. I asked him recently how he stuck with a career that made him unhappy — other than the need to provide for his family, of course — and his answer was consistent with Jeff’s second point. “I was really good at it,” Dad said. “And when you’re really good at something, it becomes more fun.”
Yep! Not ideal necessarily but you can learn to enjoy it at least temporarily.
I definitely agree with your second point. There is definitely a lot of satisfaction that comes from giving your best effort.
— Matt Kohn
Amen.
Even though my job was really bothering me and I loved hating it, it didn’t make me happier you are so right about that one. When I stopped worrying about making other people happy and just tried to do a legitimately good job, people started respecting me and the many of the previous frustrations went away
Thank you for this! It’s easy to say you hate your job and much harder to change things so that you don’t hate it. Work is a part of life – it’s okay to find fulfillment in it!
You’re welcome!
I mean this with the utmost respect, I read The Writer’s Manifesto and 7 Signs You’ve Found your Calling just a few weeks ago and both pieces were incredibly moving and influenced me profoundly, however I tend to disagree with some of your points in this piece and believe you have oversimplified things a little.
It’s good advice where applicable but I think you haven’t considered some facts of reality. This approach will work IF there is something about your job that is genuinely fulfilling when you decide to put in the effort. If there is literally no aspect of your job that gives you some sort of self satisfaction, it is impossible to truly find peace with it. Sure, you can try, you can lure yourself into a shallow sort of happiness, that reeks of the gratitude of having a job, however, that smile that you stretch across your face every day will become harder and harder to muster, that enthusiasm you so vigorously portrayed for your work will disintegrate; all it was after all, was a just portrayal, a portrayal of how your supposed to appear.
I understand that if you are unhappy with your job, you should leave but this is another oversimplification. Again we must consider realities. Some of us are stuck where we are, don’t get me wrong, I’m trying my socks off to reach my dreams. I spend literally every free second on what I’d consider my real work but making a living from it is a slow process, I’m determined to succeed though. At the same time, I can’t live on air alone. I need a source of income, leaving my job isn’t an option if I still want to feed and house myself.
Again I see the argument in leaving my job for something else while I continue my real work, however this will be of no benefit to me as a change in job, won’t mean a change in my career. I live in a country where careers are no longer exist, only jobs. Low paying, zero hour contracts with literally no benefits or bonuses, customer service jobs. I live in a country which is somehow being led by man who lost the election just a few weeks ago. In my lifetime, I have only known greed, elitism and corruption from my government and they went on to destroy any sort of future for an entire generation of graduates.
I began working part time in retail when I was sixteen and continued working as a means to pay for college. I went into my job, as I do with anything, with enthusiasm, motivation and I always put my best into my work, no matter how menial my task. I continued in this way for over a decade, during which time my part time job had become my 9-5, I continued to put my all into it, I continued to see the bright side, I continued to learn all that I could. I continued to pretend to not just like, but to find fulfillment in something that was entirely hollow to me. I continued until I broke. Until that little part of me, that one truthful, authentic tiny part of me said no more. She always saw past that stretched smile.
I’ve digressed a little further than I had intended, apologies, however, I do have a point; these aren’t some pitiful whinges of a victim of circumstance. I’ve made a choice to stick with my hallow retail job, I must accept the circumstances that comes with it. I am sticking with it as a means to support my real work, my real passion. How I deal with the consequences of my choice is entirely up to me.
For those who can find some joy in their job I recommend Jeff’s advice but for those of us who truly cannot, this method will eventually wear you down. I tried this way for most of my working life, it destroyed me.
When you wake up in the morning, the first thing you need to do is turn your working day into simply your day. Stop indulging yourself in your job and wasting your energy on something that will never truly fulfill you. Don’t waste energy on hating your job either, just become complacent about it. Just do enough of your job to meet what is required of you. Make getting out of bed worthwhile. How do you do that? You can’t just simply change your attitude.
Spend your free moments engaged with something that brings you pure and unadulterated pleasure. Find that thing thing that drives your passion and practice it every day. Indulge during your brief coffee break, get lost during your lunch, continue in the evenings and your days off. Once you being to include your pleasure into your daily routine, you’ll find that complacency towards your job will gradually develop. You’ll focus less on how much you hate your job once you provide an outlet for your true self.
It took me over ten years of searching to realise fulfilment was never going to emerge from my job but as soon as I realised that and made a few changes to my hateful and depressive attitude, it transformed my entire outlook on life.
I offer a lot more perspective, guidance and advice on this in my free ebook, When I grow up, I want to be… which I was inspired to write thanks to The Writer’s Manifesto.
https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B-h2TNnXI3WAZmJXZXRDNE1wTVU/view?usp=drivesdk
With my sincerest respect and admiration
Sarah O’Regan
http://jadedcreatives.blogspot.ie
Thanks a lot Jeff for the article. It couldn’t have come at a better time. Currently I am very frustrated with my job but unable to do much about it. The thought about finding the job in a skill that i love had totally taken over me.
Reading your article has made me realize that till the time I find a job that I love, I can still love my current job by giving it my best.
Thanks a lot. It will make a huge impact on my state of mind. :)
It’s so funny that I would read this today while I’m writing a blog post about how embracing concepts of minimalism has made me so much happier. I need to spend less time at work because I need less money. That means I have more time to spend on my photography and writing. I like my job, but I like having the time to see what I can do on my own, working with the things I’m truly passionate about.
I love the perspective that everything we do is work. Thanks for your post <3
This really resonated with me and put into words that I dont have, the way I feel about everyday life and connection with others being my “purpose in life”. Knew it in my gut, just couldnt express it, but I guess that is why you are a writer and I am what I am.
Very powerful article don’t look at work as the enemy but as a way to improve and bring you closer to your purpose.
Great post! Thanks for sharing.