The average American will spend nearly $1,500 this holiday season. And Black Friday (the busiest shopping day of the year) is the official beginning of the spending.
In fact, over 130 million shoppers will go shopping on that day. But the entire premise of Black Friday is based on the foundation of selling us things we don’t need.
If you don’t need an item on Thursday… why would you need it on Friday?
Or… what makes Black Friday any different than last Friday? If you didn’t need an item in your life last week, why would it be suddenly needed this week?
And yet many of us will succumb to the cultural expectation of shopping on Black Friday spending over $1,000 this weekend unnecessarily buying things we don’t need, adding to the collection of unneeded items already cluttering up our closets, drawers, basements, and garages.
Look around your home, you already have everything you need. If you really did need something, you already went to the store and bought it—well before a special Friday randomly placed after a holiday in November.
Your family already has everything it needs.
The things we buy on Black Friday are, almost by definition, things we don’t need. Only in America do we wait in line and push past others to buy items one day after giving thanks for everything we already have.
All those Black Friday ads you keep seeing—they are only there to convince you to buy something you don’t need.
And that’s exactly how they do it. Every advertisement, at its core, seeks to convince you that you will be happier if you buy whatever they’re selling. They stir up discontent and work to convince us that our lives will be happier, more convenient, more luxurious, or more impressive if we buy what they are selling.
The goal of advertising is to change our minds about what we need. As a result, what seemed entirely unnecessary last year has become this year’s must-have product.
But if it wasn’t needed last year, it isn’t needed this year.
How do we save our hard-earned money during Black Friday? We turn off the noise.
We turn off the messaging that is directly designed to convince us to buy things we don’t need.
This holiday season, rather than entertaining all the offers that will arrive in your email inbox, unsubscribe from as many retailer emails as you possibly can.
And see how much you save—not just financially, but in your humanity.
At the bottom of every email you receive this week announcing the biggest and best Black Friday sales, you will find a small sentence (usually in the fine print) that says, “To unsubscribe, click here.”
Go ahead, click unsubscribe. And turn off the noise.
At first, the project will seem unwinnable. But trust me, it is a battle you can win—and will be happier when you do.
At first, you might be clicking dozens and dozens of “unsubscribe” buttons every day. But slowly, the number of advertisements you receive in your inbox will get less and less. You may click 50 emails the first day… 40 emails the second day… 30 emails the third day… but you will be surprised how quickly they begin to subside.
When they do, you will discover a new level of peace and contentment in your life. You will discover a new approach to the holiday season.
Rather than being constantly bombarded with pictures of all the things you don’t have, you will be reminded of all the blessings you do have.
Thanksgiving will no longer become a day to map out your shopping path for Black Friday. Thanksgiving will become a day to give thanks for your blessings. Besides, if you are not content today, there is nothing you can buy this weekend to change that.
As you unsubscribe from the constant barrage of emails telling you that you don’t have enough, you will feel less manipulated. You will feel more like a human and less like a consumer.
And you’ll save $1,500 in the process.
Dawn says
We had the fortune of living abroad outside of America for 7 years. This is our first Black Friday in US since we’ve returned. It’s was so peaceful not being bombarded with advertisements every turn. America has so much monitory wealth, yet so little emotional enrichment. Thank you for a well written piece encouraging us to get back to our humanity and loving relationships over stressful shopping for gadgets!
Redrockyogimomma says
I love that Thanksgiving feeling of gratitude mixed with food, family, football, etc. I like it to linger as long as possible. I gave up Black Friday about 25 years ago. I remember that morning driving from store to store not getting anything I wanted and growing very frustrated. I hated the vibe, the traffic, the crowds~~all of it. I remember sitting in Target’s parking lot and vowing, “Never again”. I recognize many people get great deals and it is part of their fun holiday tradition. So….. here’s is a toast to all of you happy shoppers :0) …. I will be waiting by the fireplace with my dog and a book….looking forward to hearing all of your great shopping stories and seeing the cool things you got. Happy Thanksgiving everyone!!
Vivek says
Beautiful written
Debbir says
I prefer to focus my unspent on Giving Tuesday! The added benefit is that many charities have matching this time of year!
Debbie says
In fact, my donations can be made in the names of others, as gifts!
joshua becker says
I have a recommendation for that.
Sharon says
Great article. This year Black Friday has already saved us about $400. How? Our 43 inch television broke about 3 weeks ago. Our plan was to wait and order a new one online on Black Friday. But after watching our much smaller “spare” TV and finding it is just fine, we have decided we will not purchase a new one, bargain or no bargain. One TV is plenty for us.
Betsy says
I worked for a Philadelphia department store for years. Black Friday was a good time to find excellent prices on needed items for a lot of people I served. In all the hustle and bustle it’s easy to forget the employees that work all night or arrive at stores by 4:30 am to help the customers. Most are there because they need the money to pay the bills. In most cases they work hard but are treated very poorly. I’ve seen many an instance where a customer getting their way on something they want takes precedence over treating an employee with respect. There is no object worth belittling another person over.
My says
I live in Canada and we still have Black Friday. Thanksgiving was weeks ago.
I appreciate your ability to articulate what I feel. I have a hard time putting it into words. I was trying to explain to my husband that I don’t want to “buy Into” this consumerism’s lifestyle.
Love from Canada
Megan says
Echoing others here: for some, Black Friday/Cyber Monday is a way to obtain truly needed items that are unaffordable on other days, and that they are going without until they can afford them. Not everyone has disposable income.
Rebecca says
I agree. We are a homeschooling family with 5 kids so we have become savvy shoppers when it comes to gift giving with our kids and other family members. Sometimes something the week before Black Friday is twice as much.. so if I wait it frees funds for other necessities. We often will hold off on buying something until we know there will be a big sale. However, there is a fine line between buying needs at a good price and compulsive buying of things we don’t need that we still have to keep in check. My very organized husband has a spreadsheet of our budget for each person we buy for that goes back several years and we stick to that pretty strictly. We definitely don’t spend over $1,000, though!
Connie says
Yes I agree too. New Zealanders have come just like the rest of the world in so many ways. We still try to give practical gifts not clutter.
We even have Black Friday but no Thanksgiving celebrated. Weird.
Thanks for the article.
JL says
I was coming here to post the same thing. This article assumes that all Americans just go buy whatever they need whenever they need it. I only do online Black Friday/Cyber Monday shopping, but it is often needs being purchased at a better price. My kids get things like socks and underwear every year and they’re happy to get the worn and too small pairs replaced. My daughter needs pants and she’ll be getting them for Christmas. Our sheets are starting to get holes and pillows are in bad shape, so those will be gifts too. My husband hates to shop and he never buys himself clothes. All of his new clothes come as Christmas gifts. Of course there will be a few wants and things purchased just for fun, but not everyone is out there just purchasing unwanted junk.
Anonymous Please says
I agree and was going to comment the same thing. Our household has one TV, and it broke four months ago. My husband has been searching for options, reading reviews, watching prices and now has found the one, and it will be on sale for $200 less on Friday. I usually buy my year’s worth of shoes on Black Friday because a nearby store has them buy one pair, get the second for 50% off, and it’s the only time they are on sale (I have had bones taken out of my feet and am instructed to only wear supportive athletic shoes). I get four pairs because I walk about 5 miles daily and wear through four pairs per year. Waiting until Black Friday saves me about $150.
So, again, not everyone just goes and buys things they don’t need on Black Friday. Some of us wait all year long to save money on the things that we need and have planned our purchases for months.
Yvonne Wensloff says
I agree with all of the premise of this, but my gift lists are hoping for a match to the Friday or Monday sales so we can give more, for less. :D
Erika Pappas says
Beautifully written.