Editor’s Note: This is a guest post from Cheryl Moreau of Revive.
I have a problem with blank spaces. Whether it is an empty shelf in my closet or a pause in my conversation, I desire it to be filled. Filled with what? I’m not entirely sure. But I know when I leave it vacant, it feels like something is missing.
Can you relate? Take a look around the room you are in right now. How many shelves or surfaces are free of objects? If you are in public, how many people around you are NOT listening to music or texting?
I have a problem.
You have a problem.
Society has a problem with empty spaces.
Lately, I’ve been eliminating unloved and unused possessions from my home. The resulting empty shelves make me uncomfortable. What I am trying to ask myself is: why? Why would it bother me to have a nice, open, empty space instead of what used to be cramped, cluttered, and chaotic?
I think I have discovered at least one reason why we struggle with our blank spaces.
We focus too much on what’s not there, instead of what is.
Think about it. If you previously had a closet overflowing to the brim with articles of clothing, regardless of whether you ever wore most of them, what you saw when you looked in the closet was likely a person who was doing pretty well for themselves, even if you only acknowledged this in your subconscious. You also likely saw the opportunity for many choices. We love having choices. Even though too many choices only produces stress and dissatisfaction. We don’t care. We only know that ten shirts are better than three; and there’s always room for one more.
So when that is all taken away, we are faced with what remains: emptiness, lack of choice, desire.
Is that really what the blank space means? I don’t think so. At least not entirely. It’s all about perspective. If we choose to look beyond the emptiness, we will find something else entirely.
Freedom.
Freedom from being a slave to our stuff through cleaning, organizing, and worry.
Freedom in our finances to give, travel, and experience life more spontaneously.
Freedom in our spaces and homes to entertain, play, and live.
What happens when we apply the same perspective shift to our relationships, our thoughts, and our physical bodies? We begin to see our lives and our choices not for what we’re giving up, but for what we are gaining.
Blank space in our social activities means more time with family, more time to relax, and more time pursuing our passions.
Blank space in our thoughts means time to process what we’re doing, rather than just reacting to it. It means we can begin to develop opinions and values in regards to our choices, rather than just accepting what others tell us we should feel or do.
Blank space in regards to our bodies means being able to feel hunger again, and respond to our body’s cues, rather than assume we need to eat because we are bored. It also means not seeing what we miss out on when we make healthy choices, rather seeing what we gain: health, confidence, and a fitter body. Rest is also important, by not constantly putting strain on our bodies we are allowing ourselves time to recover and rejuvenate.
Each of us need to decide what we will focus on. Those blank spaces might feel awkward and uncomfortable at first, but just as a child requiring glasses needs to adapt to wearing them in order to have improved vision, we too will adapt, and then, will be able to see with more clarity than ever before.
Don’t see the emptiness in your blank spaces, see the possibilities.
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Cheryl Moreau and her husband blog at Revive where they challenge and help others eliminate the excess to leave room for excellence. You can also follow her on Twitter.
Peggy says
Empty space–gives a place for your eyes to rest.
Wayne Stiles says
Very nice, Cheryl. Such a necessary perspective! One of most wonderful feelings is having a blank space in a conversation—or in someone’s presence—without feeling the need to say something.
I’ve always loved this quote by John Ruskin: “There is no music in a ‘rest’ but there’s the making of music in it. And people are always missing that part of the life melody.”
Cheryl says
Thanks for sharing, Wayne. That is a beautiful quote and so appropriate for me as I love music!
Judy says
I’ve always been drawn to empty spaces. Thank you for this post. You have inspired me to keep that in my minds-eye as I continue on my journey to clean it up and clear it out! :)
Mike Burns says
Great post, Cheryl!
My favorite line: “Don’t see the emptiness in your blank spaces, see the possibilities.”
JF Moreau says
I agree with you Mike, I love that line!
J
F
Rebecca says
I agree that I love what my kids do with empty spaces. Walls with no furniture get turned into backdrops for “productions” empty closet shelves and floors get turned into forts and secret bases.
Open, empty spaces lower my anxiety. There is no to-do list sitting there.
BrownVagabonder says
Wow, this post came at the perfect time. I moved into my condo last week and I have a lot of empty space in there, that like you said, I felt compelled to fill. Now that I read this post, I realized that I have been trying to fill the empty space without any real purpose to the filling. Maybe I am trying to fill another empty space (inside of me?). Thank you for pointing out the fault in that thinking. I am going to think of the possibilities in empty spaces, rather than the emptiness itself.
Dana says
I’m in that uncomfortable space now, I’ve cleared the clutter from my home and schedule and now I have to decide what my priorities are and what to do with my free time. We are deciding if we should have a 3rd baby. Babies take lots of time and so do kids. Do I want another to fill the awkward blank spaces or was it that once I decluttered I saw there was room in my life for one more?
roses of paris says
Blank space and silence – two vital things that make most people uncomfortable yet provide liberation and insight
Carl says
Silence is golden.
Karen says
This is a great post. I find it interesting to watch what my children do with blank spaces as they work much easily on intuition. I recently cleared my son’s closet shelves where his toys are stored, leaving two empty shelves. He is delighted with this space and uses them to crawl into and play. I often find a child on each shelf with the closet door closed, lol.
I also remember once at the end of a sports event, same son being so excited when the sports hall cleared and he had a whole empty space to run around by himself.
Children find a lot of freedom in empty space. It is such a shame when we fill that space with stuff.
Cheryl says
Thank-you, Karen!
I love what you shared about your children playing in those “blank spaces” the same thing happens in my house! I actually have an empty bookshelf that my daughter uses for both a make-shift dollhouse to a couch for her stuffed animals. Thanks for reading!
Jessica says
So true, blank spaces give you lots of possibilities!
When I started with minimalism, whenever I saw a blank space I got nervous, but over time – the more I got into minimalism – I couldn’t be without blank spaces anymore.
Now, if there is no blank space things become overwhelming to me and have to be cleared. I think there is a beauty in omitting things sometimes.