Editor’s Note: This is a guest post from Courtney Carver of Be More with Less.
“I have memories – but only a fool stores his past in the future.” – David Gerrold
As you simplify, you will notice that the most important stuff is left. This applies to kitchenware, toy boxes, closets and even to your sentimental treasures. Often times, the most difficult stuff to get rid of, is the stuff soaked in memories. We become attached to things that remind us of our past, and our loved ones. Your great grandfather’s pocket watch, your first pair of roller skates, or your son’s artwork from kindergarten, all transport you to another time, and usually fill you with lovely memories. Unfortunately, because you don’t want to clutter your home with stuff, these treasures are buried in boxes in the garage or attic, only to be rediscovered during a move, or a trip down memory lane.
I must admit, I am a sap and a sentimental fool. I get teary driving past a wedding, hearing stories about my grandparents or cooking one of my favorite dishes from childhood. In my life, I have saved notes from the 4th grade, albums from my first rock star crush, my daughter’s first bathing suit, heart shaped rocks from hiking with my husband and jackets my dad gave me that never fit, but were so cool, because they were his.
How do you get rid of the stuff that means so much, and evokes so much emotion, in the name of minimalism and simplicity? There are several ways to simplify the sentimental. Each concept includes focusing on what is most important and honoring your history.
Share the love. Unless you are on a mission to live with less than a certain number of things, why not display some of your sentimental items? Less does not mean none. Paring down your objects of memory does not necessarily mean ridding yourself of them all. Instead, paring down your sentimental items allows you to focus on the most meaningful. Chances are, the things with all the memories are in a box in the garage or attic. Sort through those boxes and choose the things that mean most to you and your family and display them. Sometimes we hold onto things to hold onto people that have left our lives. Honor the ones you love by sharing what was theirs.
After all, a box full of memories stashed in the basement is far less meaningful than 3-4 specific items displayed proudly in your home. So go through that box of mother’s things in the basement, select the 3 that most represented her life and the influence that she had, display them proudly, and remove the rest.
Make it useful. Did you save the china that your parents received on their wedding day or a special necklace that was passed down to you? Why not use it? Donate your everyday plates and eat off the dishes that mean so much. Wear the memorable piece of jewelry every day instead of waiting for a special occasion, or forgetting about it completely. You may come across things that you can’t use and don’t want to keep, but someone else will find your sentimental items to be quite useful. Use them or pass them on.
Put it in the cloud. If you have been saving printed photographs, documents, receipts and other paperwork for years, it might be time to digitize your docs. Sort through it all and toss the trash. Scan the rest or hire someone to do it for you, and organize in folders. From there, back it up through Dropbox.
Shoot your stuff. When you are uncluttering, save the things that mean the most to you, and take a picture before letting them go. Preserve the memories inspired by stuff through photography. Group items creatively or take pictures using the things. For instance, if you saved a baseball hat from your childhood little league team, take a picture of your child wearing it. Create a digital photo book with images and descriptive text, so you can enjoy your memories without the clutter. A book like this makes a beautiful gift to someone else in the family who wants to enjoy the memories without the clutter.
Tell your story. The most powerful thing we can offer is our story. As you simplify your life, you will come to the realization that the most sentimental things aren’t things at all, but stories of the people and places we love, and how we spend our time. Write about the things you love, instead of holding onto them. Start a family blog or keep a personal journal. Your words may start out describing your mother’s watch, but turn into a beautiful story about an afternoon the two of you spent together.
Approach each area or section of your life the same when it comes to letting go, and revel in what unfolds. Not only do you make room for the good stuff, but you can clearly identify what is most meaningful to you. Instead of filling boxes with the things that define your life, spend more time creating your life, giving to others and sharing your story with actions, thoughts and gratitude.
What other ideas do you have for shedding sentimental stuff?
***
Courtney is a writer and fine art photographer. She writes about simplifying and living life on purpose at Be More with Less. You can also follow her on Twitter.
Kathy says
Before my beloved Grandma passed away, the whole family was having trouble with my parents and my Grandma told me to burn all the letters she had ever sent me because they sometimes discussed my parents in them and she didn’t want anyone to see them. I did as she asked because she was the one relative that I loved above all others. That was at a time before scanners were very common and I so wish that I had kept some of those letters or scanned them, just to have a piece of her and her handwriting left. Other than that, I don’t save much from my childhood because it’s not worth saving. It’s all the scrapbooks from the time since I got married and had my own family that take up so much space!
norski says
One object I had a very hard time getting rid of was my grandmothers brass bed. It was a full size that we did not need. Then I thought it would help me get rid of it if I sold it, but found brass beds don’t go for as much as I thought. Finally found the best solution when people we knew lost their home to a fire. I offered the bed and they gratefully accepted. Her 89+ year old father moved in soon after and it became his bed. Now, even 2 years later I ran into her yesterday and she thanked me again for the gift. WOW! Release stuff to the universe people – someone needs it more than you.
Rachael says
My new mantra when decluttering: “Release this into the universe” love it! Thank you
Lizzie says
I found a box of blankets the other day. Most of them went in the charity bag but there are half a dozen fleece blankets which I made / bought for my two boys when they were little. They went back in the box (where they have been for the past 6 years!).
Happily a friend of mine is due to have a baby later this year and needs some blankets, so I get to give them to her. :-)
I might just take a pic of the blankets on my (now big) boys, just to show me how much they have grown up.
Thanks for the encouragement to keep going with not hanging on to stuff that is no longer useful. The sentimental items are hardest.
Whitney says
We are collecting all the “keepsakes” from our daughters school years and grouping them together and taking pictures. Then creating a bound book (like through Walgreens) with the pictures and stories. They are much more frequently shared and looked at than boxes and boxes of things!!!
url emusic free trial says
Do you mind if I quote a few of your posts as long as I provide credit and sources back to your site?
My website is in the very same area of interest as
yours and my users would really benefit from a lot of the information you provide here.
Please let me know if this ok with you. Thanks a lot!
Van says
Hi Courtney,
It’s amazing how you articulate so many of my own beliefs about decluttering and simple living. I just read this entry today. When I read the last bit of advice – tell your story – I knew I was on the right track with my own decluttering project. I call it Project Shed, where I write about the items I love but need to let go of. I sometimes feel like its a silly, self indulgent project, but seeing how you recognize the place of honor the memories these objects evoke made me feel validated. Thank you for this post.
– Van
jaishvats says
Hi
What you have mentioned is so very true. Its very tough getting rid of things to which one has a sentimental attachment.
There are times when I am in a cleaning spree when I would selectively retain things and dispose the rest. I just make best use of that :D
Betty Winslow says
Great tips – thanks! Another thing we found that was helpful when my mom died and Dad moved to assisted living was to pick out some charities that we supported and donate a lot of stuff to them: furniture to the program that helped international college students furnish their apartments, clothes to the battered women’s shelter, office supplies to the school I work at, and so on. It made it much easier for Dad to give things away, to know they were going to a good home where they’d be useful and appreciated. I’m still struggling with some of the sentimental stuff, but Mom’s only been gone two years, so I’m willing to go slow for Dad’s sake.
Another thing I’ve done over the years (for me and for customers) is to turn a piece of unwearable sentimental jewlery into something that can be worn: a pair of clip earrings into pierced, a stone off a cheap childhood ring into a pendant, a broken bracelet into a refurbished one, some old brooches into wall art. So fun to help people make an old memory into a new one!
Peggy Kemp says
Great article and good ideas. I had this photo idea suggested some years ago when I was agonizing over keeping my mom’s large trunk that she got when she left for college. I had it for so long, but it was just TOO BIG and not practical for storage because it smelled of mothballs. I took several photos of it and gave it away to a friend who refurbishes old trunks. I haven’t really missed it – any time I want to, I can pull up the many happy memories associated with it, and removing it gave me the space to have a little art center. It’s always hard for me to give up sentimental items – the hardest part of decluttering. Writing about the memories is a good way to share and reinforce them.
karen says
I, too, am happy that I found this, but how do I know the stuff I throw out isn’t worth money as a vintage item? I have sooo much stuff, I get overwhelmed when I get started, and then don’t know what to do with it, then I stop, and then, the cycle starts over again!!