My grandfather passed away in 2020.
At his funeral, I delivered the eulogy. Here is a portion of what I said:
What can I say about this man? What can I say about a man I’ve always wanted to be just like? What can I say about a man who shaped my worldview and understanding of God more than anyone else? What can I say about a man I named my own son after?
He had a significant impact on my life. You can read my entire eulogy here.
During one of my last conversations with my grandfather, before he got sick on Thanksgiving, he made a statement to me that I found to be incredibly profound.
He said, “We live our entire lives under the shadow of death.”
While I didn’t tell him at the time, I found the statement to be deep and life-enhancing when understood correctly. In fact, merely hearing it brought about further resolve of my desire to live a minimalist life.
Consider its weight: We all live under the shadow of death.
That statement has been true in 2020 maybe more than any other year as local and national media regularly report death counts from all over the world and daily public service announcements can be heard over the airwaves asking us to act responsibly.
But death is not new to us—despite the unprecedented times we live in.
In fact, we live every day with the understanding that it may be our last. Not in a morbid, depressing way (shockingly so), but in the awareness and reality of understanding life.
Every time I get in my car to drive to work or the grocery store, I know, instinctively, something tragic could happen to me or another driver. I also know, full-well, that even if I don’t leave my house, a medical emergency could befall me or someone I love. I am not immune from a cancer diagnosis, a heart attack, a stroke, a brain aneurysm.
I have plenty of loved ones who unexpectedly received life-changing news, or were tragically stricken.
As grandpa said, “Life is lived under this shadow of death.” The reality of it surrounds us every day of our lives. And even if we don’t have a close, loved one who recently passed away, we almost certainly know someone who has.
Nobody escapes life alive.
But somehow it seems, human beings are able to both live with the knowledge of death and somehow function apart from it.
Death is inevitable. And yet, I am able to live wholly today, focused on the present and the future, as if it won’t happen to me today. I am aware of coming death, but not paralyzed by it. It is a fascinating paradox and ability of the human mind when you think about.
While the shadow of death does not paralyze me, in the quiet moments of life, the shadow motivates me and sharpens the wisest among us.
Only a fool lives as if their life will never end.
We receive one life to live, with a limited number of days and a limited number of resources with which to accomplish our purpose. Almost all of the resources we consume during our journey are limited: money, time, energy, space, focus, capacity, even the relationships we are able to pursue.
This reality of our finite nature is an incredibly important truth. It is one we should intentionally choose to focus on each day. Because when we do, it changes our actions, our motivations, and our pursuits. It changes us:
Because life is finite, we make better choices.
Because time is finite, we spend our days on things that matter.
Because money is finite, we spend it on pursuits that will outlast us.
Because our energy is finite, we choose carefully where we focus our passions.
Because our days are finite, we value relationships and love.
Because I live under the shadow of death, I will choose a minimalist life and reject the empty promise of consumerism and what this world offers. I will live for greater pursuits.
Life will end—indeed. And that realization should affect the decisions I make each day. But rather than causing me to throw in the towel and give up on life, this shadow of death will spark hope and resolve and passion to spend each remaining day of my life making the most of it.
Sheila says
Thank you you Joshua for helping me remember that we are all in the shadow of death. You are right when you say we live apart from that reality. My condolence on the death of your grandfather. He will live on in your memories. I too lost my Mum just over two years ago. I find myself remembering her in the things she used to do. Thank you for the article. It comes at a good time.
Julia D Blizin says
So very sorry for your loss. Your Grandfather’s comments and point of view describe the fragility of Life that few wish to embrace because it is not in the self-interest…but I would say the opposite. He was very Wise. Some of us understand intuitively that all Life is finite and use this as a clock, ensuring that we do not waste or squander our time. The Minimalist Life ensures that more people understand this. Thank you for sharing your very personal loss; I am confident that your Grandfather would not have wanted any less from you. Sending you condolences and strength for the future.
Gloria says
My condolences to you and your family, Joshua. What a touching eulogy. Oh, if we all only had someone like your grandfather in our lives.
Niki Larson says
Probably for the last 10 years or so I have been trying to get rid of the clutter; or chaos as I call it, that surrounds me and my family. This year 2021 especially I am am determined to do just that. — After the long year we just had and being stuck at home the epic desire to throw stuff grew in me. Especially after living without a kitchen for 4 month’s due to a remodel.
I don’t know as though made up excuses ever got in the way but, health issues have. Even now am looking down the barrel of bilateral mastectomy. If ever I needed to understand and be accepting of “ the more of less” this is the time.
I haven’t read your books, but I have a full file of becoming minimalist emails. I am sorry for your loss and will pray for you and your family as you continue to grieve.
David McKee says
So appropriate as a set of thoughts to start this New Year. Thank You.
Maria Pinto says
I am so sorry for your loss Joshua, & I will light a candle for you & your family. The wisdom your Grandfather left is awesome & profound. I lost my husband two years ago & although my grief at times is overwhelming I have support & people that care. No one escapes death but like you say it is a wake up call to how we live our lives to it’s fullest each day we are here.
Thank you for your ongoing wisdom & courage.
Denise Cochran says
This will get passed on to my friends for sure. Wow! THANK YOU Joshua!
Julie from Canada says
My condolences on the list of your grand-father. Thank you Joshua for sharing this inspiring article.
Denise Cochran says
Whew! If this wasn’t the most profound way to begin the first entire week in January, I don’t know what would be. THANK YOU Joshua!
Dave says
I’m so sorry for your loss. What a perfect tribute to someone who sounds like he was very special. Thank you for sharing it with us.