From the outdated kitchen to the pastel-colored walls in the downstairs bedrooms, walking into my grandparents’ house was like entering a time machine. It was a world of midcentury furniture (not the kind from special art dealers or collectors; these were the default options, purchased mostly in the 50’s).
There was a desk in the hallway, reading chairs in the living room, classic rugs, houseplants, and a grandfather clock in the entryway. The sectional was minimal and left room for plenty of guests. My grandmother would always read on the couch, and stacks of magazines filled many of the nearby cabinets.
They never identified as minimalists when I was growing up—frankly, the term hadn’t been popularized yet—but everything had its purpose and place. The home felt complete with pieces that fit together like the perfect puzzle.
Growing up, I looked in their home with awe. I have countless fond memories of summer vacations and family holidays in their loving home. They seemed to have it all together. I wanted that.
When I was older, I felt this social pressure to make a complete home from day one. To leave anything incomplete seemed somehow against a cultural norm.
It wasn’t until adulthood that a simple realization clicked: my grandparents took years to purchase a household of goods. They had decades together to acquire their belongings. And their home wasn’t always like this; they consciously acquired things when needed.
Stuff was expensive, too. This was all before the cheap labor and overseas manufacturing of the Walmarts of the world (heck, they didn’t even exist back then).
My grandparents lived within their means every step of the way, depending on what was in their wallets. They carefully analyzed every purchase, and reused everything they could. Maybe that’s the consequence of being a product of the Great Depression? Who knows.
What we do know is that our world has changed dramatically since then. The rise of easy credit has allowed for ballooning consumer debt—from about $2,000 in the 1950s to $16,000 in 2016.
Now, we are instant gratification generations—swiping now and paying over time.
We expect to have everything at once, but we’re going broke in the process. Our credit cards have larger limits, products are cheaper, and buying is as easy as a click online.
We make pilgrimages to furniture stores, fantasize about spaces before we’ve set foot in a place, and browse websites that give idealized examples of carefully crafted rooms. The world is primed and expecting our consumption.
Each represents a radical departure from the lifestyles of the Greatest Generation.
I can’t help but think our ancestors knew something about minimalism that society downplays now.
When my wife and I first got married, we moved into a two-bedroom apartment and purchased only a table set for $99. Oh, and a bed—we needed that (for a number of reasons). Our living room furniture and bedroom set were hand-me-downs from her family.
We received a television set as a wedding gift. Our next purchase, months later, was a computer and desk.
We replaced the living room furniture 18 months later during a cross-country move. We used the $99 kitchen table and chairs for 13 years. And still use the bedroom set handed down to us from her grandparents.
Our home took years to make whole. And I don’t think I’d change a single thing about the process. It is a story of slow acquisition.
But outfitting a home slowly and intentionally carries a number of benefits:
1. It prevents debt. Buying home furnishings and decorations is a costly endeavor. Accumulating slowly helps prevent the danger of starting out with costly consumer debt—it can take years to overcome financial mismanagement.
2. It spurs intentionality and thoughtfulness. When we accumulate slowly, we are more likely to thoughtfully weigh the significance of our purchases. Is this really needed? If so, what is the best option and avenue for purchase? The more deliberate we are in our timeline, the more intentional we become in the process.
3. It slows the accumulation of clutter and excess. The slower we purchase, the slower we accumulate life-draining clutter.
4. It grants freedom in lifestyle. Consumer purchases inhibit freedom. They require money, time, and energy to acquire and maintain.
Therein laid my grandparents’ powerful lesson: to make our home ours, we couldn’t buy stuff immediately to recreate or mimic another’s space. Instead, we thoughtfully considered what we needed and budgeted carefully for each addition.
Despite living in a world of accessibility and easy consumption, we all need to find ways to slow down. The “perfect” item will remain or can be recreated, if necessary. Sales come and go. And your favorite big-box retailer probably won’t be going out of business any time soon.
Give yourself the opportunity to make your space yours. But as you do, don’t forget to consider the merits of acquiring pieces slowly.
Never be in a hurry to spend money you don’t have.
ritalynn says
My home furnishings are pieced together from second hand shops and garage sales. The only new pieces of furniture are the matresses….
My couch is a day bed that is older than I am. My 2 ocassional chairs I bought at a garage sale and recovered. My coffee table and 2 end tables are adorable steamer trunks that I found at second hand stores and sales. My dining table and chairs I bought at an estate sale in amazing condition. My bed frame and all the bookshelves in the house are made by us from rough lumber found in an old garage. The area rugs are new.
I have owned my current home for 11 years and finally feel the house is starting to reflect my vision of cozy….all on a tiny budget!
It can be done, even in the modern world…
Joyce E Peterson says
As I was reading through the comments – I wondered why no one had mentioned the value of second-hand furniture. Even today (2020) one can find good solid furniture in Thrift stores and on-line markets or hand-me-downs from family. Personally, it gives me such a great feeling of accomplishment when I am able to refinish a piece of furniture for my home that is WOOD and not panel-something. We used concrete blocks and lumber to “build” bookshelves and TV stands in our earlier years. I have a weakness. It’s the comparison thing. When I invite someone new to my home, I look around and mentally compare my “things” to others’ things. As I grow older, I am learning to not care. If that person is not able to accept me as I am, then do I need to have that person in my life? Another point of simplifying- getting rid of people who are not true friends.
BKD says
I totally agree. My husband and I have lived in our home for 14 years with our 2 kids, and it’s only recently that we’ve been able to really start carefully curating and making it exactly as we want it to be. All these years we mainly lived with either hand-me-downs or cheap fast fixes to things, but now that we’re able to be truly intentional about our space, I have done the bulk of refurnishing our house (to be more practical and usable) through either rescuing old family items, bartering with neighbors, or shopping secondhand. A damaged pedestal sink that had to be replaced was upgraded to a vanity that we made by adding a countertop and sink to a salvaged dry sink we got for free. I recently realized that after culling our collection of table linens to only those we love and use, I didn’t have a suitable place to store them, and I waited and scoured options until I was able to find a solid wood antique apothecary cabinet at an estate place — it was less than half the price I would have paid for a “new” version, and just needed a good cleanup and some knobs to become the perfect solution for our dining room. I got a beautiful vintage chandelier from a neighbor who was going to throw it away, and when my children needed a desk area for distance learning, I balanced a run of bargain price countertop across an old pine chest of drawers no one in my family wanted and added some sturdy old kitchen chairs. Voila, a desk for two. We have very little “new” in our home and it’s so much more functional and beautiful than it was when we were trying to piece together the latest fads within what little budget we had to work with.
adrian says
My father is 83 , my mother is 80 . They have no internet , no mobile (cell) phone bills ( they have a mobile , which is a pay as you go , and is used only for an emergency ). All bills are paid at the post office . A food shop is done once a week in his 15 year old Toyota , which is spotless and well looked after , The house is tidy and nicely decorated , the garden is the only issue as it is big and they sruggle to maintain it . My father in particular , never wants anything , he replaces stuff when it wears out or goes wrong ( if he cant repair it ) . He is happy and content, and so is my mother . It is a generation thing I think , eveything now is to easy to access , a simple click and you are £££s or $$$ in debt or Facebook is letting you know that your best friend is jetting off on a 3 week holiday in country you cant pronounce ! and will never be able to afford . I personally feel we could learn a lot from the wartime generation .
Linda Sand says
My husband and I are 70 this year. We have a family settee. His grandmother bought it. His parents inherited it. Then it came to us, then his sister, then his niece, now back to us. It has been rebuilt and the cushions need to be recovered again. But we all love this settee and many a person has spent many a night sleeping on it so we expect to keep on fixing it forever.
Mindy Doyle says
Such a lovely story about your grandparent’s life and home! Since decluttering half of our stuff in 2013-2014, I’ve thankfully lost the urge to continue filling our home with more stuff. I can enjoy beautiful things in a store without the desire to own them. And when I do actually need something, I wait until I find exactly what I’m looking for. In the interim, I make do and do without. It is serving me well. And I have you to thank for these changes! It was your writing that encouraged me to declutter our home, and kept me inspired through the sometimes tiring process! Thank you.
John says
My family is in the process of moving from California to Nevada. Even though we had a clutter free home, we were still able to sell and donate a lot. Felt good. So, your post is timely as we will so be faced with a new home to settle into!
Kate says
I love this idea but find it hard to implement in my own life, for the sheer reason that I am part of a military family. Each move brings different houses, which means the couch that fit in living room for the past three years is now two big for the next three years. Those curtain rods, well they worked two houses ago but this house has ones that have to be hung on clips. It’s important, for me to make our house feel like a home a quickly as possible for my children and husband. I’ve been trying to focus on yard sales, resale websites, thrift shops. We are overseas this time so at least
I won’t hear the sirens call of Target.
D says
Wonderful article, thank you!!!
Connie says
I have found that slow acquisition leaves lots of empty space and that means easier cleaning! Less furniture to move when vacuuming and fewer surfaces to dust. I can clean a 3 bedroom, 2 bath house in 3 hours. I hustle for those 3 hours, but then I’m done for the week.
It also makes me consider if I really need another item & if I’m willing to clean and maintain the item. Thanks Joshua for your thoughtful posts.
Nathalia says
My husband and I have taken this approach for the 31 years we’ve been married. We are debt free because of this. Some may view us as procrastinators for being so. Over these decades our home has been furnished mostly with hand me downs from family, some who have passed on. Making these pieces cherished.
We’ve also applied this philosophy to our home which we’ve owned for 30 years. We’ve had to replace flooring and paint, a roof and various repairs over the years, never “upgrading” or remodeling. Raised our kids here, now empty nesters. We’ve kept it very clean, well cared for, loved. Our home is extremely well small 1400sf (by today’s standard). Many down size to this. Our philosophy is;
If it’s not broken why ‘fix’ it?
Katie says
When we first married our home was full of handmedowns and second hand items. I clearly remember buying a new cot for me daughter and feeling very extravagant! That was the only new item of furniture for a very long time. When we moved to our current home we were in a good position and able to buy some new items. But the items that give me most pleasure are ‘heirlooms’ in that we inherited them from my late in laws and my grandmother. A beautiful wooden dining room set with matching cupboards and a display cabinet with a drinks section. The piece from my grandmother is a kitchen unit with s drop leaf, spaces to store bread and cooking ingredients, plates, glasses etcetc. Every time I see them I am reminded of the love with which they were originally bought, I know they were saved for and bought with pride. We have the pleasure of looking after them for a few more years now.