I find it difficult to admit most of my life was wasted chasing the wrong things. Looking back, it has become increasingly clear how I spent the first 33 years of my life chasing temporal, material possessions. I thought my life would improve as I acquired them.
It was supposed to be the “American Dream.” But I was all wrong.
While my household possessions were not extravagant, they accumulated over years—especially as we moved into larger and larger homes. Each move would result in more rooms to furnish and more empty closets and storage areas to keep our stuff. Fashions changed and thus, we bought new clothes. New technology emerged and we purchased new gadgets. Kids entered our family and with them came toys, gifts, hand-me-downs, and purchases “necessary” to raise them correctly.
Eventually, our possessions began subtly to control our lives. We spent countless hours cleaning, sorting, organizing, repairing, replacing, removing, and maintaining our physical possessions—not to mention all the time we spent on the front end earning the money just to make the initial purchase in the first place.
Our pursuit of material possessions was controlling our checkbook, draining our energy, and robbing us of true, lasting joy.
But then, everything changed.
When I was 33 years old, we began giving away all the possessions in our lives that were not absolutely essential to our purpose and goals. Eventually, our family removed over 60% of our earthly possessions. And we couldn’t be happier. We found more time, money, and energy to pursue the things in life most valuable to us: faith, family, and friends. We discovered far greater fulfillment in life pursuing our passions than we had ever discovered pursuing possessions.
And now, my only regret is that we didn’t pursue simple living sooner—that we wasted so much time, so many years, and so many resources. If I could do life over again, I would have embraced a minimalist life earlier: my teens, my twenties, or as a newly-formed family. As a result, from the very beginning, we would have experienced:
- Less debt.
- Less clutter.
- Less financial obligation and debt.
- More savings.
- More intentionality.
- More presence with others in my life.
- Less need to get ahead at others’ expense.
- More passion.
- More contentment.
The life-giving invitation to minimalism holds benefit for every generation. It is never too late to start no matter what stage of life you are introduced to it. But my life would attest to the fact that today is the best day to begin living with less. And the earlier in life, the better.
Phil Pogson says
We learn best by experiential contrast – the first 33 years were necessary to ensure the next 66 are extraordinary……
Romy Macias says
Joshua,
I’ve discovered that regret and guilt can also be discarded. It makes life lighter!
The past is gone. The present is NOW.
Peace,
Romy
Kevin says
“we began giving away all the possessions in our lives that were not absolutely essential to our purpose and goals”
I think this is one of the key points. Too many of us acquire possessions that serve no real purpose.
Sam Desai says
Decluttering life is going to be on priority in my life now. I always believed that but after I got married in 2005, knowingly or unknowingly many things entered in my life… watches, shoes, clothes and accessories all started piling up. Now, at 45 I want to get rid of all those things so I can breath again. I have just one debt on the house which also I want to get rid of as soon as I can.
Tim Denning says
Thanks Josh for this article. I have been inspired, partly by your site, to start living a more minimalist life and selling things I don’t need. I feel so much better since I have done it and I am going to continue.
Tracy Lieberman says
You found something at 33! As a 50 year old I think that is amazing. And maybe the 60 year old will find the fact that I found minimalism at 49 amazing. Time is precious and now you are not devoting your life to pursuing “things” you are golden!
Amy says
While I’ve only just recently discovered this blog, I’ve been on a similar journey for the last couple of years. I feel like I wasted my 20’s doing the same – accumulating things and debt. I was about 28 when I started to experience anxiety over the fact I could never keep up with the housework. We’d just had our third baby and we figured with each child we needed a bigger house. And of course more furniture to fill that house, and more toys which I thought my children had to have in order to grow into smart, functional people. I was so so wrong!
I spent so much of my time cleaning and tidying up that I always found myself telling the kids ‘soon sweetie, just let me finish this’.
They didn’t need toys or a big house, they just needed me. Their toys would always end up in the living area or kitchen near me, never in the large play room that we thought we needed.
Our lease came to an end and I realised we needed a major change in our lives. I began purging the excess, selling it all online or donating to charity. Every day for weeks I’d fill the back of our SUV with things to donate. I couldn’t believe how much stuff we had to give away. And I felt incredibly blessed to be able to bless someone less fortunate with what was considered our junk but could mean everything to them.
We literally got rid of half of our stuff – half the furniture, half the linen, half the toys, more than half the kitchen gadgets which just collected dust.
We moved into a house approximately 1/3 the size of our previous one. And I continued to purge. It seemed the more I got rid of the less I wanted.
Somehow, two years later I’m still finding stuff to get rid of, and I’m choosing to move into an even smaller house next month, one less bedroom, one less living space.
A marriage breakup a few months ago meant even more stuff left my home, and as more time passes the more I realise how desperately I want to live a simple life, filled with quality time with my little ones and loved ones, not filled with anxiety over maintaining the stuff I bought on credit.
Paper Doll says
I am just finishing my first year in this journey. Starting March 1st, I am ending the year having gotten rid of 1785 items. Yes, I journal them and count them. And I set a goal for next year. I am so happy I started and although I can get frustrated when I see all that I still have. A start is a start and I am happy to be sharing the journey with many others.
karen says
Agree with this post! I started my journey about 7 years ago, after 3 close members of my family died within 6 months of each other. Cleaning up other peoples lives is an eye opener to stuff. I did not want that for my kids. You see clearly what you, and others, have spent their lives, their resources, their time on, and it makes you think very hard. SInce then, I have been getting rid of, paring down, reevalutating, everything I have, and do. I can tell this is the year that I will downsize my 5 bedroom home and it will be okay. Many of the rooms, closets, storage spaces are already empty and now the final push ( painting, cleaning, etc) is happening. I knew I had really crossed over when replacing a expensive front loader washer last week was replaced by a good old fashioned, plain agitator top loader with no bells and whistles. Thank you for your website, I find it very encouraging. Best of everything good in the New Year.
joan knearem says
I am still at my age to down size and every time I look at an empty space I get a feeling of contentment.