“If you make a habit of buying things you do not need, you will soon be selling things you do.” —Filipino Proverb
Our experiences hint at it. Studies confirm it.
Buying material things don’t make us happy.
The pursuit and purchase of physical possessions will never fully satisfy our desire for happiness. It may result in temporary joy for some, but the happiness found in buying a new item rarely lasts longer than a few days. Researchers even have a phrase for this temporary fulfillment: retail therapy.
There are many reasons buying more material things won’t make us happy.
9 Reasons Buying Material Things Won’t Make You Happy
They all begin to fade. All possessions are temporary by nature. They look shiny and new in the store. But immediately, as soon as the package is opened, they begin to perish, spoil, or fade.
There is always something new right around the corner. New models, new styles, new improvements, and new features. From clothes and cars to kitchen gadgets and technology, our world moves forward. And planned obsolescence makes sure our most recent purchase will be out of use sooner rather than later.
Each purchase adds extra worry to our lives. Every physical item we bring into our lives represents one more thing that can be broken, scratched, or stolen.
Possessions require maintenance. The things we own require time, energy, and focus. They need to be cleaned, organized, managed, and maintained. And as a result, they often distract us from the things that truly do bring us lasting happiness.
Our purchases cost us more than we realize. In stores, products are measured in dollars and cents. But as Henry David Thoreau once said, “The price of anything is the amount of life you exchange for it.” We don’t buy things with money, we buy them with hours from our lives.
We discover other people aren’t all that impressed. Subconsciously (and sometimes even consciously), we expect our newest purchases will impress other people. They will notice our new car, computer, jacket, or shoes. But most of the time, they are less impressed than we think. Instead, most of them are too busy trying to impress you with their newest purchase.
Someone else always has more. The search for happiness in possessions is always short-lived because it is based on faulty reasoning that buckles under its own weight. If happiness is found in buying material things and more stuff, those with more will always be happier. The game can never be won.
Shopping does not quench our desire for contentment. Contentment is never found in the purchase of more stuff. Our overflowing closets and drawers stand as proof. No matter how much we get, it’s never enough.
Experiences make us happier than possessions. All research points to the fact there are far more effective way to find happiness: enjoying life-changing experiences, for example.
And 1 Thing that Might
Adyashanti, the American-born spiritual teacher, offers a theory as to why the acquisition of new possessions provides only a temporal feeling of happiness. He explains it this way:
When we make a purchase and/or get what we want, we are temporarily happy and fulfilled. But the reason for happiness is not because we got what we wanted, but because for a brief period of time, we stopped wanting, and thus we experience peace and happiness.
On the topic of buying stuff, his thoughts are helpful. And I have repeated his theory dozens of times in private conversations. Of course, the natural conclusion of this thinking is to limit our desires and wants—to find peace and happiness by not wanting.
But for me, this conclusion falls short.
The goal of minimalism is not to remove desire entirely from my life. Instead, the goal of minimalism is to redirect my desires.
There are valuable pursuits available to us: love, justice, faith, compassion, contribution, redemption, just to name a few. These should be pursued with great fervor. But far too often, we trade the pursuit of lasting fulfillment for temporary happiness. We can do better. We can dream bigger.
Redirect your desires toward lasting pursuits. Find happiness there.
You will never find the right things looking in the wrong places. (tweet that)
Gladys says
This is very true. That’s why I’m embracing living in simplicity
Kush Sharma says
I think the fifth point about things costing us more than we realize is a real eye opener. I’m from India and here people spend huge on weddings. I know weddings are an important part of anyone’s life, but spending more than you can earn in 2-3 years time is just being careless. It’s almost a tradition here and is carried out even if the family in question is concerned about their financial health.
Jude says
I embrace the whole idea of minimalism but am struggling with the decision of when to retire from my career of 25 years. Financially it is a no brainer. If I stay another five years I will have considerably more money for the rest of my life, but I am turning 60 and would like to be able to do some of the things I’ve always wanted to do before sickness or age prevents me from doing so. If I retire now I know we won’t starve but I’m afraid I will wish I had more money for travel, etc. I keep wavering back and forth on this decision. Help!
Kimberly says
My dad took a early retirement at 60yrs. He lived to 68 yrs. The eight yrs. were wonderful! We never know how long we have.
igor Griffiths says
Well hello Joshua, I am certainly guilty of retail therapy and as you point out the long term issues it creates far outweigh the temporary joy of the attainment.
Rather we should redirect our thoughts to what we have rather what we don’t, for instance does the car we have meet our needs? If so then what is driving us to stretch ourselves for the latest model, peer pressure or our own ego that links the ability to purchase with success.
igor
Heather says
Brilliant post Joshua! I love the last bit on 1 thing we can do better! I love the reminder that we CAN do better!!! I know this to be true. Dreaming bigger already with heart wide open! With love and gratitude, Heather
Danny M. Navia says
Thanks for these tips. I have made my life so simple, that made so liberated and free. I am not jealous anymore with the gadgets and new things of my co-workers. Sometimes I hate shopping malls already. I wish there are more libraries than shopping malls. The only habit that is so life-changing for me is reading books especially self help books. And another habit too is reading articles in http://www.becomingminimalist.com. I even would like to go back to the primitive life of early people. Simply good. I still have gadgets. The gadgets in my possessions are the most important and they are lasting decades with me. Nowadays, I have no interest with any gadget except Kindle E-book reader and Headphone for my music. Thanks Sir Joshua.
Christina says
So true. I truly believe that when we make changes to remove something in our lives, we need something else to fill the hole that is left behind. Redirecting ourselves towards love is a high calling. In the yogic tradition that is Bhakti. You have a Bhakti heart Joshua. Thanks for sharing it with us.
Christina
AmyeToTheRescue! says
Perfectly brilliant! Thank you. You help me get it…
Hilary says
While I agree with you on the whole and certainly with the drive of consumerism to buy, buy, buy, I have to add one caveat. That is by buying or creating art one need not hedonically adapt to stuff. I have four beautiful bookcases and store a fabulous collection of books I love, both for inormation and enjoyment. I also have a collection of five hand made Persion rugs. It doesn’t matter how often I walk through my sitting room I always smile when I look at my books and rugs. I’ve been enoying them daily for more than a decade now and I don’t stop enjoying them. I also enjoy the results of my embroidery. Its not quite good enough to be considered art, though it is certainly quality craft and made into household products of both beauty and usefulness. So buying to make one feel better, no. But buying carefully chosen products you really enjoy can and does improve my day to day quality of life.
ren says
Agreed, keep the treasures, and ditch the rest.
Flor says
Heck I just spent $64 dollars to mail a box that weighed 34 lbs! What’s in the box?
Namebrand shirts , some still has price tags , reminded me of how mindlessly i used to
buy stuff. As if in a trance programmed to buy more, more, more! I shipped it away so that someone else will find those clothing items useful. Because somewhere along I forgot the reason why i needed all those shirts. I am awake now, i am no longer in a trance.