When decluttering expert Marie Kondo published her ground-breaking book, The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up, hordes of grateful, stuff-encumbered readers around the world seized particularly on her question “Does it spark joy?”
That was the criterion Kondo proposed for deciding whether to keep something. Does an item in your possession give you a little thrill when you hold it in your hands? If so, hang on to it. If not, then So long, mustard-colored cardigan with the leather buttons.
Suddenly, it seemed like everyone who was flirting with the notion of decluttering their homes began talking about joy-sparks. Surely, in Kondo’s simple question was the razor to slice through indecision about what to keep and what to toss when pursuing a simpler lifestyle.
End of story. Or is it?
Let me begin by saying that, to me, any voice calling us to own fewer possessions is a welcome voice.
In America, we consume twice as many material goods as we used to 50 years ago. Over the same period, the size of the average American home has nearly tripled, and today that average home contains about 300,000 items.
Most homes contain more televisions than people. About 25 percent of two-car garages don’t have room to park even one car inside them, and still one out of every 11 American households rents off-site storage—the fastest-growing segment of the commercial real estate industry over the past four decades. Meanwhile, home organization, trying to find places for all our excess belongings, is now an $8 billion industry.
We’re at material overload and it isn’t fun like it looks in the commercials.
We live in a society where families are chronically stressed, tired, and rushed, with our excessive possessions compounding (if not creating) the problems. IKEA chief Steve Howard may have let a secret slip when he said that in the western world we’ve reached “peak home furnishings.”
The de-clutter, de-own movement is rapidly catching on, as evidenced, for example, by the popularity of Tiny Houses and the growth of organizations such as the National Association of Professional Organizers and the National Association of Senior Move Managers.
My family became converts to minimalism in 2008 after I wasted a beautiful Saturday morning cleaning out my garage, and a neighbor, seeing my frustration, made the casual comment “Maybe you don’t need to own all that stuff.” As I surveyed the heap of dusty things piled up in my driveway, out of the corner of my eye I noticed my son playing alone on the swing set in the backyard. And right then I had a life-changing realization:
Excess possessions do not bring extra happiness into life; even worse, they distract us from the things that do!
Today we live in a smaller house with only a third of the possessions we used to have. And we couldn’t be happier now that we have more money, more time, and more energy for the things that matter most.
Along the way, I’ve seen how Kondo’s trademark filter has prompted significant decluttering efforts both here and abroad. I’m thankful for that. Yet I can’t help but bristle at the phrasing because the question “Does it spark joy?” may actually rob tidying up of its fullest potential in our lives.
Specifically, we get three things wrong when we evaluate our possessions only by asking whether they spark joy or not.
1. We place our own happiness above everything else and continue to define it in terms of our possessions. Unfortunately, when the predominant question in our mind is “Does this make me happy?” we routinely fall short of actually realizing our happiness. In fact, recent research points to the biological fact that the best way to discover happiness is to help bring it about in someone else’s life.
2. Kondo’s suggested focus does not cull our consumeristic tendencies. Owning less is great, but wanting less is even better. Once we overcome the pull of consumption in our lives, we are free to pursue other passions. Unfortunately, the question “Does it spark joy?” does little to rewire our thinking in that regard. After all, when we’re standing in the department store, many things we pick up spark joy. That’s why we leave with so many of them in our shopping carts.
3. The filter may improve the peacefulness of our surroundings, but it does little to bend the trajectory of our lives. It rarely causes us to evaluate the motivations within that caused the clutter to build in the first place. And when we do not diagnose the cause of our clutter problem, we are bound to repeat it.
So let me propose an alternative question for us to ask ourselves when we’re making the hold/release call on any particular item in our possession. Rather than asking, “Does it spark joy?” let’s begin asking:
Does it help me fulfill a greater purpose with my life?
As I see it, we should be thinking about not just what we own but why we want to own it. What is our goal in life, anyway? What are we hoping to accomplish?
Sure, some people may only be interested in the pursuit of personal pleasure by acquiring as much stuff as possible, but I believe they represent a small minority. Instead, most of us desire to make a selfless contribution of some kind to a world that’s swelling with needs.
Several years ago, my wife, Kim, and I created a nonprofit called The Hope Effect that is changing orphan care by providing solutions that mimic the family. We would never have pursued this interest of ours if minimalism hadn’t freed up the time and money to do it. I’d still be spending my Saturdays cleaning and organizing. But today our lives are permanently different, and so are the lives of a growing number of parentless children around the world.
Orphan care is not everybody’s passion. But whatever others feel they were put on the planet to do, some of their possessions are either directly or indirectly helping them accomplish it, while others are holding them back. It makes the best sense to keep what aligns with their goal in life and get rid of the rest.
So when you’re holding one of your possessions in your hands, ask yourself, Does it help me fulfill my purpose? Does it help me craft a lifestyle in which I am able to build relationships and care for others, or might I be able to use my time, money, and energy in better ways?
Clear away obstacles one by one. Then advance toward your goal.
There’s a big difference between tidying up your home and freeing up your life. Instead of merely sparking some joy within yourself, light a fire in the world.
Alex says
I agree with the idea that asking whether an item sparks joy has the potential to miss some of the value of the simplistic tools we use everyday. A ‘spark’ of joy to me brings the expectation to feel a momentary thrill for an object, rather than thinking of the deeper value of the object – the long term , practicality, contentment and gratitude we get from living a minimalistic lifestyle.
Our culture of consumerism sells us that ‘short thrill’ of having something new. However, the long term satisfaction and ease of only ever having 2 plates to choose from or to wipe, creates the value of a slower paced and perhaps more harmonious ritual. With each step of decluttering, I have given away many of the items that ‘sparked joy’ as many of those items were for ‘adoring’, today my environment has practical items that have helped me to form a life style of gentleness, peacefulness and graciousness. My everyday handling of these objects have become a sacred way of life.
In a way, this deeper connection with my possessions could be seen as a lasting subtle joy – rather than a quick thrill- and is the result of focusing on my daily needs and creating rituals that use specific items and actions to create a gentle way of life. There is a space for feeling joy, but for me it was an unlearned of what I thought was Joy, and the deeper sense of this emotion came after the decluttering.
Jane says
I think you have hit on the reason for confusion in what Marie Condo means when she says “Does it spark joy.” I feel that people put too much importance on the word spark as a sudden and fleeting feeling.
However when building a fire that will last, just like the deep and lasting joy you talk about, you need a spark to start the burning. In my view, spark is not about a sudden thrill that dies away quickly, but more the brilliant start that leads to a lasting feeling.
anon binary mouse says
Just like the person who posted about the spatula comment, sometimes we simply need things on an irregular basis. Selling/ridding of those things just to buy them again when needed would be an immense monetary and environmental waste, just because it takes up space.
I do however keep a limited wardrobe, but I do have a lot of tools, because I actually need them for house/car/other maintenance from time to time.
Having only things that “Does it help me fulfill a greater purpose with my life?” is not all-encapsulating. If you are actually someone who has to maintain things, even if it doesn’t serve a ‘greater purpose’ that’s life. Discipline in actually cleaning and yes re-organizing is something your children would be well-served to understand and do. It is irresponsible to not have enough extras/spares. While I believe in lean six sigma mostly, sometimes you need to add-in items/steps that assure for quality control (personal and otherwise).
“Sometimes boys, dad just has to make sure things are functioning well. I’m sorry this does take some time away from doing more activities. However, remember, I’m mostly present and when we hike or camp et cetera, I’m here with you. You’ll understand, sometimes you have to take time away from those you cherish, because that’s life, and it isn’t a fairy tale.”
I wrestle with my boys, we have conversations, and while I’m not perfect, I certainly have a known life purpose for myself. And it doesn’t require getting rid of even access items – they serve a purpose that doesn’t even remotely fulfill my life purpose et al.
I don’t worship at their alter, they are tools, just like a toothbrush. Why three 100-foot extension cords? Because fortunately/unfortunately, sometimes you need three all at once, and you waste more time and money trying to get down to just one 100-foot extension cord. If the decluttering burns more time and money in the end than keeping the extra stuff, what was actually more detrimental?
Certainly, living in mounds of newspaper is excessively inefficient, but so is trying to get things so exact, that you end up having to take yet another trip to the store to rebuy something you literally had, but your significant other deemed as ‘excessive’ and therefore unneeded.
Sarah says
Josh,
I think a lot of people missed the point of your post. I thought Marie’s book was rather silly, but that was my opinion. The main problem for me was the focus on getting “joy” out of STUFF. That kind of joy never lasts, I don’t care how much you “love” your red sweater. Helping another that is less fortunate, being kind, being loving, putting others first, loving God….all those things bring the right kind of “joy”. STUFF is temporal.
Ayda Y. says
I read both Marie’s and Joshua’s book. In my perspective Marie’s philosophy making much more sense and deep meaning for the “purpose of my life” for me.
I am saying this, because nobody has a right to decide which is better than other. Taking “minimalism as the only truth” for better life is wrong and going too far.
In this article, I observe two things:
1. Joshua thinks his way is better than Marie’s and argues as like it is a fact, not his personal opinion. This is kind of arrogant approach. For example, from my personal perspective it is vice versa (Marie’s philosophy is much more deeper than Joshua’s)
2. Joshua didnt really understand what Marie is trying to say about in her book. I would recommend him to read the book again, maybe several times, without a background judgement mechanism which compares methodologies.
Making such kind of comparison only lower the values of both methodologies in an unnecesaary way.
Jay H says
I agree this article is a bit arrogant.. trying to make me feel guilty re not changing the world. I think the question should be – does it still spark joy? I ended up with clutter because I once had a lot of extra cash and didn’t think too long about purchasing items that at the moment seemed to spark joy. My habits are better now… I think much more carefully before deciding to make a purchase. I’m now just trying to get these past reminder items of frivolous foolish decisions out of my house. Once decluttered I hope to spend more time on hobbies and enjoying the outside. As far as making the world better .. I try to help whoever I can daily… on a small scale… that’s about all I’m game for at this time. And the items I’m keeping… yah they do make me very happy. Stuff can bring happiness too .. we just can’t get too crazy or one day we will regret it, for a few reasons.
Laura says
I completely agree with you. As I was reading this article I thought, “this guy hasn’t even read her book Spark Joy.”
I just finished it (with very low expectations) and actually loved it. I felt like it takes minimalism to a higher level (and more enjoyable!)
I’m disappointed with the tone of this- it’s not a competition!
Debbie J says
Agree!! I got a very negative feeling while reading this article. :-/
Kate Kelleher says
Perfectly said. There is room for everyone. No bashing allowed. Stay in your own Hulu hoop. You do you and I’ll do me and we will both respect each other.
Joshua, thank you for not adding me to your mailing list. I receive it at another one.
ES says
I agree. Kondo did address reducing consumerism, overstocking, avoiding marketing that encourages more shopping, and creating a serene environment that frees us from thinking about maintaining our stuff and rather appreciate what our stuff allows us to pursue.
She also addresses practical items like spatulas with a solution that is not discard and rebuy to contribute to consumer waste
Courtney says
I agree with the message in this post. I don’t perceive this as a personal attack on Marie Kondo. People who do see it that way may need to ask themselves why this post has really upset them. “Sparking joy” may help you trash items you don’t want anymore, but if that becomes your only criteria for what comes and goes from your life, you may find yourself down a wasteful and selfish path.
Estell says
“Does this spark joy?” is just a starting point for some. You cannot judge the people who read this book that they’re not minimalist enough just because they don’t happen to apply your own methodologies. It’s such an easy almost trivial question that anyone can easily disregard or flag as “wrong” which is why people who find themselves daunted by even the thought of decluttering their houses never get to start doing so.
There are a lot of techniques out there and neither are right or wrong. It just so happens that Marie phrased it so well and easy that it feels like anyone can do it so. It’s a shame that some people would have to pit on others just to make themselves appear better, like what other comments here say.
You’re only confusing people because Marie’s not even trying to push minimalism on people. Her main point is surrounding yourself with only what sparks joy.
Sarah says
From reading this article and the comments, it seems like most people did not read either of Marie Kondo’s books. If you read them, you will understand the question , “Does this spark joy?” better. Otherwise, you have just a trite understanding of a catch phrase.
Also, she never says that that question will help you become a minimalist. So, why would you use that question to become a minimalist? There’s a big difference between decluttering and minimalism.
Karen says
My beginning step of becoming a minimalist began with reading Josh’s blog and his many articles. Then I found “Be More with Less”. Courtney gave me the idea of 333 for my cluttered clothes closets. Wonderful idea!
Their frequent personal emails/blogs about how and why to get rid of clutter have encouraged me greatly. I also read some of Marie Kondo’s articles and have enjoyed how to make my dresser/clothes look neater. Having said that, I find that everyone has helped me in one way or another. I didn’t agree with everything they said and just picked out what I could relate to. I am confidant I will achieve what I want because I have slowly but surely continue with this process with their help. There are more people/blogs to discover to keep encouraging me with whatever info they have to share.
Erin says
I think Joshua has gone further in his minimalist mindset than most others who are entering into the whole “decluttering” craze for the first time. It’s good to be reminded that we need to go deeper and think about values, but when you are just starting out, the simplicity of “Does it spark joy?” is an excellent catalyst for change. And, once you have achieved a simplified, organized home, it is much easier to then go deeper. After all, I doubt Joshua was thinking along these deep lines when he first started out.
JoyofLess says
I don’t want to shrill for my own blog, but I wrote an article that addresses this question from a similar angle, asking if minimalism and Marie Kondo’s method (KonMari) were the same thing. If you’re interested in comparing the two, you might find it of interest (link via my username).
To summarize though, I think the two share much in common but have a couple of notable differences.
Minimalism and KonMari differ in their approach. Minimalism asks you to say goodbye to everything except that which is essential. In contrast, the KonMari Method asks you to identify what you love – what sparks joy. It may seem like a minor difference but it shapes the way you look at your belongings. For Minimalism, stuff is a necessary evil. For KonMari, what you keep, which could be a lot or a little, is celebrated.
Here are a couple of quotes that I see as representing the different starting points.
Minimalism
“Truthfully, though, most organizing is nothing more than well-planned hoarding.”
― Joshua Fields Millburn, Everything That Remains: A Memoir by The Minimalists
“The things you own end up owning you.”
― Joshua Fields Millburn, Everything That Remains: A Memoir by The Minimalists
KonMari Method
“Discarding is not the point; what matters is keeping those things that bring you joy. If you discard everything until you have nothing left but an empty house, I don’t think you’ll be happy living there.”
― Marie Kondo, Spark Joy: An Illustrated Master Class on the Art of Organizing and Tidying Up
“The important thing in tidying is not deciding what to discard but rather what you want to keep in your life.”
― Marie Kondo, Spark Joy: An Illustrated Master Class on the Art of Organizing and Tidying Up
Erin says
I actually started the decluttering of my home as a response to all the books and articles on minimalism and how they really spoke to me. I thought I had done all I could until Kondo’s book came out and was so highly praised I decided to read it. It opened my eyes to how much more I could do, as well as how I could use that question to control impulse buys. If the thought of an object living in my home every day did not spark enough joy, I didn’t buy it! Now I am perfectly comfortable picking up an object in a store, holding it in my hands and admiring it’s beauty in the moment, then setting it back down and walking out because though it is beautiful in that moment, I know that its beauty will not endure in my home. I will grow used to it and eventually lose my love for it. Better to enjoy it in that moment, then walk away, than to spend my hard-earned money on something that will eventually wear out its welcome and be discarded down the road.
Also, her book goes into a lot of detail into how to treat those items that you need or that spark joy. Her method of folding clothes, for instance, seemed odd and silly at first, but after trying it, I realized how much more sense it made and how much less room it took in my drawers. It made choosing what to wear in the morning easier, and I was able to downsize my furniture even further just by folding my clothes differently! Of course, none of that has much to do with values except that when you get to that point of minimalism that is your personal “sweet spot”, you are far more free to focus on the values in your life.
Daria says
I have mixed feeling from this post.
I disagree with the critics of Marie Kondo principle. If to take the question “does it spark joy?” from context and ignore peculiarity of Japanese culture you can think that such question just persue us in our possession to own things. In fact if to read Marie entire book you will find that “spark joy” means things which are important for us and which we use often. This is about things which make us feel comfortable, confident etc. And the true is that really not so many things makes us feel this way and usually we use the same things all the time. The rest we don’t need. And overall things at home are usually for every day routine: what we dress, with what we clean, cook, relax etc. For such things question about helping to fulfill big aim is not relevant but this things have to bring us pleasure every day as TRUE LIFE AND HAPPINESS IN EACH MOMENT. And if we have favorite cup for morning coffee why it’s bad? It just makes a nice ritual for ourself which helps to set up mood for the whole day.
Question “does it help me to fulfill greater purpose with my life” is really interesting and motivating but in my view more suitable for our actions.