It’s 7:43pm and you’re at mile 25 of your daily parenting marathon.
The finish line is in sight. So far, you’ve hosted a play date, dragged Halloween costumes out for dress-up, played at the park, supervised finger painting, and judged a Lego competition (which you determined to be a tie—naturally). Dinner is done and the children are bathed.
After your spouse reads a story to the kids and makes sure their teeth have been brushed, you seal the day with a kiss on their foreheads. You begin looking forward to a calm evening watching some television or catching up with your spouse.
Unfortunately, before you even have a chance to sit down, you quickly realize the day’s work isn’t done just yet.
While the children have “technically” cleaned up after themselves, your home still feels a bit chaotic.
Costumes are falling out of the king-size plastic bin you swore would solve all of your organization headaches. Kids’ and adult sneakers and flip-flops are scattered beside the shoe shelf you built beside the back door. The kids’ art easel is blocking the laundry closet, which is bulging with its own clutter. And while the kids did pick up most of the Legos from the floor, their favorite creations are still being displayed atop a stack of unread women’s magazines on the coffee table—the same coffee table you were hoping to rest your feet upon.
By the time you go to bed, the house is “mostly” back in order. But in the back of your mind you know the following evening you’ll be facing the same clutter once again.
Maybe It Doesn’t Have to Be This Way
Ten years ago, after a conversation with my neighbor, my wife and I sold, donated, or discarded over 60% our possessions. We removed clothes, furniture, decorations, cookware, tools, books, toys, plus anything else we could find in our home that was not immediately useful or beautiful.
At the time, the concept of purposefully owning less stuff was foreign to our worldview—especially being raised in a society that relentlessly promises happiness and fulfillment in our next purchase. But, for some reason, the idea of owning less sounded oddly attractive.
I had been introduced to the world of minimalism. And I was drawn to it.
Today Americans consume twice as many material goods as we did fifty years ago. The size of the average American home has nearly tripled in size over the past 50 years and now contains about three hundred thousand items. Our stuff has even spilled outside our walls. Due to our garage clutter, 25 percent of people with two-car garages don’t have room to park cars inside and another 32 percent have room for only one vehicle! And I haven’t even mentioned the 10% of us who rent offsite storage.
We are drowning in a sea of possessions—and we feel it almost every day. We’re tired, stressed, hurried, and financially strapped.
The most popular solution to our battle against clutter seems to be “just implement better organization”—or at least, that’s what we’re told is the solution. So we’ve bought colorful buckets, bins and baskets from the same good folks who sold us the costumes and the Legos and the magazines and dryer sheets. But in the end, although the storage solutions we’ve bought promised to solve all our woes, they’ve only packaged them differently.
But there’s a solution that’s even more effective than organizing.
The surprising solution you’ll never find in an Ikea catalogue, plastered on a billboard or featured on a Google banner ad is to own less stuff. Owning less results in less cleaning and organizing and managing and repairing.
But the benefits go far beyond that: Owning less sets you free to pursue your dreams and become the person you desire to be.
The Unlikely Way
When you choose to live more lightly—both releasing some of what you have and choosing to add less to what you already do have—doors to pursuing your dreams begin to open. I’ve seen it in my life and you can experience it in yours.
Because when you own less, you’re freed up for what matters most.
My friend Marjorie had kept a jar of coins her grandfather had given her for about ten years. When she moved homes, she’d hauled the jar to a shelf in her new closet. They weren’t precious coins that could be sold for a profit; they would be worth whatever the screen displayed when she dumped them into the sorting machine at her bank. Marjorie had promised herself that she and her kids would do something special one day, like visiting a waterpark. But they never did.
When Marjorie’s heart and mind were captured with the more of less, she finally took those coins—and all the others she’d scraped out of junk drawers, couch cracks and purses—and cashed them in. After they’d gone to the waterpark, Marjorie had money left that she was able to donate to a local charity.
Similarly, Sarah recently told me her story of always wanting to do mission work overseas. When her church announced a weeklong trip to Haiti, Sarah began dreaming of going with her teenage daughter. Inspired, Sarah and her daughter made the connection between all they owned and what they hoped to be and do. Together they gathered and sorted much of the stuff in their home they no longer needed or used.
Sarah’s daughter made $325 on Craigslist and eBay selling electronics they no longer used. Sarah held a yard sale where she sold their extras and welcomed donations to purchase supplies for orphans in Haiti. Sarah and her daughter were not only able to raise the money for their trip, they experienced benefits they’d not even anticipated. Their clutter-free home didn’t accumulate more clutter each day because they were living with less. The space was pleasant to live in and they loved the extra time they gained by caring for less stuff.
These are real stories. And I hear more and more almost every day. Stories of people who have begun to live their dreams, because they chose to live with less stuff.
Just Do It
If the stuff you own is keeping you from pursuing your dreams—dreams for your family, dreams for yourself, dreams for others—then you can begin to embrace those dreams by taking a few simple steps to live with less. And while these baby steps begin with decluttering—which is, admittedly, not so glamorous—the ultimate purpose is to put yourself in a position to fulfill the dreams you have for your life.
So before you leave this article, I want you to write down your dream. If you use a journal, go get it. If you tape notecards to your bathroom mirror, grab a notecard. If you post sticky notes on your computer, go get a pad. Keeping in view the bigger picture of why you’re reducing the amount of stuff you own will help as you purpose to reduce the amount you own.
What is your dream?
If you keep your eye on the reasons you’re aiming to live with less, you’ll have more energy to do the work before you.
Now that your motivation has been articulated, here are a few tips to help you get started removing the excess from your home:
1. Start Small. Focus on easy battles, scoring quick wins and establishing momentum in your decluttering journey. Don’t make hard decisions. Just grab an empty bag and remove everything you can easily part with. Put them in the bag and set them aside for you. You can sort them later.
2. Start Easy. A bedroom, bathroom or living room will be easier to begin with than an attic or kitchen. Plus, if you remove what you don’t need from these frequently used spaces you’ll experience positive effects almost immediately.
3. Start Noticing the Benefits. Take a step back, look at what you’ve accomplished. Are you experiencing more peace, more calm, less distraction, and more peace? Notice the practical ways owning less improves your life—and use that motivation to tackle harder spaces in your home.
As you begin to declutter, experiment to discover what makes the process most satisfying for you. Is it offering scooters and baseball mitts to the younger kids next door? Is it seeing a once-crowded shelf become usable once again? Is it setting goals of gathering 100 items each weekend and relaxing during the week? Every person’s process is different, so find what works for you.
Live the Dream
Remember that index card on your bathroom mirror? As you choose to own less you’ll free up time, money and energy to be who you want to be. When you shop less, you spend less time driving from store to store and spend less money on what you don’t need. When you release what you don’t need you spend less time organizing and cleaning all you own. Don’t let those gains go to waste.
Purpose to take practical steps to realizing your dream:
- Spend 30 minutes each day working at your craft
- Mark your calendar with the day you can volunteer locally
- Devote three hours next weekend to developing a business plan
- Start a bank account to save for a mission trip
- Enroll for a class at your local city college
- Enlist your kids in collecting canned goods for a local food pantry
You have been gifted with a desire for abundant living. As you choose to own less, you’ll discover time, money, and energy that can be used to make it a reality.
Ola says
I’m always torn between wanting to get rid of things ASAP, and wanting to sell them. We’ve been minimizing continuously for about 18 month now, and it will change you in amazing ways. Thank you for the encouragement!
Amy says
“You have been gifted with a desire for abundant living.” This is the most beautiful statement linked to deep spiritual truth. My longing for abundant life is not striving… its a gift from my creator. Wow. What a freeing new spin on this truth. Continually inspired by your take on minimalism. Much thanks.
Samantha says
Wow. This is absolutely me. A mom of 2 young boys I get so frustrated and actually angry seeing/stepping on/ “organizing” all the “stuff”.
Joshua, this really spoke to me. I wish over the years I hadn’t bought (on credit!) every “cute” thing and anything that remotely “matched” my decor/home colour scheme etc…and now all I have to show for it is debt. If I could have read and understood this 10 years ago we’d be in a better place. But then there’s a holiday, a birthday, a bridal shower… more stuff to buy and be given…but no more.
Love reading your articles…they’re changing my life and the direction I’m taking. Thank you!!
JosieR says
I love reading your articles. I get really inspired because I feel that my soul would be more free if my space was cleared of clutter. My brick wall is, and always has been, what do I do with very usable things that can’t be donated? I have so many hair products and I can’t find anywhere to donate them. Even the local women’s shelters say they can’t take shampoo or conditioner or hair gels that are partially used. It’s hard to throw these very usable–and expensive–items in the garbage. And absolutely no one will accept hair brushes or combs or hair rollers, even though some of them have been used only once. I get discouraged and stop my decluttering, once I get to these items. Any advice is much appreciated!
Julie says
After a horrible experience with Goodwill, I do not donate anything to thrift stores anymore. Nowadays, I set up a card table on my lawn with a “FREE” sign taped to it, and all my castoffs go there. I put it out in the morning and by the end of the day nearly everything is gone. It’s amazing what people will take if they don’t have to pay for it. I have gotten rid of so much this way, including unused shampoo, lotions, cleaning supplies, etc. Good Luck!
Nancy says
My husband used to have a “clean up business”. He cleaned yards, homes, garages, Etc. That’s where my Clutter originated.
I couldn’t bear to take the usable furniture to the dump when I knew someone out there needed it, so I made a “Free Stuff” sign and it was taken within just a couple days. (I live on a dirt road in the country) The smaller things I sold a in a flea market but it closed down. I have so much stuff left. It’s not only in my home but a whole shed full. (mostly small stuff)
I have a dream! Yea! I want to take a cross country trip to visit my aging family members in other states and see a few sights. I have sold in one week and made 500.00 toward this goal. I used FB Marketplace! Now I don’t say that for THEIR benefit because it really helped ME! So for the big stuff I will sell and the small stuff will be free. Minimizing as I go. My house is less cluttered and now I’ll work on the shed full of stuff.
Thanks Joshua, your words help me so much! Your Emails are the only ones that aren’t marked as spam.
Plina says
Can’t you use these products for some reason. If you can, I would commit to using them before buying anything new.
Charice says
I started decluttering a year ago and did a great job. I donated a ton of stuff. and have not added anything. Then i stopped and feel frozen. Its like decluttering freaked me out and now i cant do any more. I have bags and boxes started to donate but they dit there for months. I have no help. My family is in another state and my friends use exuses to not help once a month. Just wanted to get suggestions on me helping myself move again.
Ashley Logsdon, Marriage/Family Coach says
Maybe a deep dive day where you knock it out, and then, instead of it being a monthly deal, you move to weekly. Keep a donation/sell box out that you can consistently put items into, and tackle them weekly so it’s not as big of an ordeal.
Another thing is simply clearing an area and putting it all into a box. And then only pulling something out when you need it – then putting it back. If it stays in the box for x months, you know it’s not worth holding on to.
And lastly, when you are decluttering, I like clearing a whole area so I have a blank slate to start with. Then I will sort first, and determine if I have any duplicates, if it’s really necessary, etc – only one of what is needed will go back, and I ask if it is useful or does it delight me enough to hang on to it?
Hope this helps!
Joyce says
Joshua, I’ve read several of your books, amd listened to your “Minimalism and Spirituality” many times on YouTube, but this article spoke volumes to me. Just what I needed today. Thanks to your writings, I’ve gotten rid of lots of things, but have been at a stand still for a few weeks.
Thanks for always writing/sharing from the heart. God’s blessings.
joshua becker says
Thank you for the encouraging words, I appreciate them very much. Best wishes to you!
Jenna says
Great post! I have been trying to become more of a minimalist for quite some time now, so will definitely continue to follow your posts :)
-Jenna <3
Follow me back? The Chic Cupcake
joshua becker says
Thanks Jenna, I appreciate that!
Tony W says
I love the idea of focusing on your dreams rather than acquiring the next new great gotta have thing.
How many next new great gotta have things and up in draws and closets unused months later? Almost all of them. LOL.
joshua becker says
Yes, you’re right Tony. Thanks for sharing.
Jaclyn says
I love reading these articles and getting inspired to declutter. But as I begin, I always get hit with this brick wall ‘what if I need this?’ In the past, this wouldn’t have stopped me from discarding. But just a few months ago it became necessary to stay at home with my 3rd child. Now, instead of having two incomes and having the privilege of buying things only when I need them, It is harder to buy essentials. So when I am cleaning the bathroom and am about to throw out that almost-empty bottle of extra shampoo in the closet, I stop myself because I know that I very well might not have enough money that week to buy another bottle when I run out of the shampoo I am currently using. Therefore I save it knowing that there’s a chance I might need it in the future. This scenario threatens every item that is piling up in my house. And I feel stuck facing a growing ‘back-up’ stash. Am I the only one with this problem?
Sarah says
You are not the only one!!!
I am that way too. I think it’s called being frugile and practical!
And there’s nothing wrong with it!
joshua becker says
You’re right Sarah!
Angela says
If you can get one more shampoo out of that bottle, that can only be a good thing.
I’m sure you will throw it when it really is empty.
That might mean adding a drop of water to stretch it even farther.
Besides, with less money coming in, it makes perfect sense.
Best wishes,
Angela
joshua becker says
That’s a really good point Angela, Thanks for sharing!
joey says
I grew up in a family with a ‘back up stash’ and I took that way of thinking with me when we got married. It proved to be extremely useful when we didn’t have much. However, fast forward a decade and our home was too full for my liking. The things that I had tucked away for a rainy day were taking up too much living space.
My solution was to simply just start using it up! Yes it takes longer to see results than donating it (and I have done lots of that as well if the item no longer brought me happiness) but putting it to use made me feel really good. That feeling of not needing to go to the store to buy more because I could use up what I had on hand felt awesome! We would challenge ourselves to see how long we could go without buying more. And once the item was completely used up (for example all of the bottles of shampoo were rinsed clean) I only bought our 1 favourite brand after that. Having our favourite brands always available makes us happier in our day to day living. Even my shower feels cleaner and more spacious!
Dee Ann says
I feel like there are two “what if I need this?” scenarios. Your bottles of shampoo are something you truly use, so therefore do need. I’d keep emptying them into one bigger bottle and use every drop. But if it’s, for example, a bunch of craft supplies for an activity you haven’t participated in or enjoyed in years, or something that the person you think you should be (but not the person you truly are) might need “someday,” then I’d donate those things to someone who will use them now.
Ashley Logsdon, Marriage/Family Coach says
Great responses here! I agree with Dee Ann – look at what you will use up quickly, like shampoo, vs. the random craft project. And like what Joey said, just focus on using it up! Don’t hold off for “one day” – utilize what you have, and be very strategic and intentional about anything else you bring in.
I did this and had my “shopping box” – I cleaned out everything I wasn’t using now, but put all the extras – like toiletries and bulk items – in my “shopping box” so when I would run out of the ONE item I was using, I would replace it from my box vs. going out to the store. That “backup stash” will get smaller and smaller as you go!
Katherine Polhamus says
It feels like a natural high to me when I start sorting and giving away items I no longer need or have meaning to me.
Unfortunately, I’m married to someone who doesn’t share this view and tends to be a hoarder. So while I minimize, he’s always looking to add more.
It’s ideal when two partners share this value or when people live alone and can make this commitment to owning less.
Ashley Logsdon, Marriage/Family Coach says
Katherine, it sounds like a great opportunity to look at your dreams together – talk about what “family” means to you and what your home is like – deeper than the goal is the emotion behind it. Identify what feelings you want to have when you think of “home”, and then start looking at what both of you can do to make this happen. When you start looking for the emotion behind what he’s holding on to and what you are craving, you can explore other ways to reach that feeling that works for both of you. Super quick answer for a complex scenario, but hope it’s helpful for you!