A few months ago, my wife and I took our kids on a short weekend trip to the mountains. As we pulled out of our neighborhood and merged onto the four lane highway, we suddenly realized an important detail for the trip had been left undone.
Kim and I both assumed the other person was going to make the necessary arrangements. As a result, neither of us had accomplished the task. And now, the trip had already begun.
The problem would ultimately be fixed with a little extra time and money. But in the moment, our conversation abruptly ended. Tenseness ensued. And both of us stared silently out the windshield in disgust.
After a few short minutes, one little voice called out from the backseat, “Umm, are you guys ever going to talk again?” The silence had become unbearable.
I was reminded again how silence has become a difficult atmosphere in our society.
In our homes, we turn on our televisions. In our cars, we turn on the radio. When we exercise, we put on our headphones. Even when waiting in elevators or on hold with customer service, sound fills the void.
It seems we have become uncomfortable with the very presence of silence in our lives. We speak of “awkward silences” in a room full of people. We fear that brief moment when we meet someone new and aren’t quite sure what to say. And I remember being on countless dates growing up where any lapse in the conversation meant the entire relationship was doomed forever.
My family even pokes fun at me when I mute the television during commercials—as if the idea of sitting in quiet for 2 minutes is too long.
But in a world filled with noise, silence becomes even more important.
It is no secret we are bombarded everyday with countless messages.
Advertisements from every flat surface and frequency tell us what to watch, where to go, and what to purchase. Countless artists fill canvases, screens, and printed paper hoping to convince us of their worldview and beliefs. Political pundits from every aisle and experts from every imaginable field speak boldly about how we should proceed on the most important issues of our time.
Meanwhile, silence quietly calls for our attention. Because only in extended periods of solitude, can we rediscover our hearts and the voice of timeless wisdom in our lives.
The benefits of silence and solitude in a noisy world are significant and life-giving. In quiet moments of reflection:
- We remove the expectation and influence of others.
- We hear our heart speak clearly.
- We reflect on our past and chart our future.
- We find rest and refreshment.
- We break the cycle of busyness in our lives.
- We become better equipped to show patience and love to others.
While anyone can experience silence at any time by finding a quiet place to sit for an extended period of time, I have found solitude does not occur naturally in our noise-centered world. It must be intentionally pursued by each of us.
But for it to be pursued, it must first be valued and desired.
Be reminded of the importance of silence and solitude. Make its presence a habit in your life—both in small ways and in big ways. You’ve got nothing to lose. And your whole life to gain back.
JuliaEM says
Very nice and relevant topic. But I just keep wondering what task detail you forgot about that frustrated you so – lol. See the problem for me is that there is too much noise inside my own head – constant mental chatter, even in a silent place. I have a habit of wondering about things and immediately looking on line to get an answer to whatever silly question just popped into my head. I know curiosity is not a bad thing, but I constantly distract myself! I need to find away to quiet myself sometimes, even more than my environment.
JuliaEM says
Oops – I just meant to write “detail”, not “task detail.”
Mathias says
Very interesting post!
I think the main reason we shed silence so much is because there is a social pressure against it. We grow up learning that talking and being loud is socially acceptable, while silent people are portrayed as abnormal and weird.
This is a shame since we need a balance between speaking and silence in order to be healthy.
Carina Spring says
Thanks for this post. It put to words something I’ve been feeling, but haven’t been able to hear through all the noise.
Chris says
Another inspiring article! Thanks Joshua! I’ve always wondered how it was in the past. People didn’t have to cope with so many distractions connected with noises. Were they more attentive? I think it is a good question. Contemporary technology gives us so much convenience but at the expense of silence. We live so fast that it is really difficult just to stop and hear your interior. It needs training and mindfulness, but it is worth doing it. On the basis of my own example, I can agree with Joshua’s 6 points. Unofortunately, it has been a long way for me to accomplish that (it has lasted for 3-4 years), but I was a really hopeless case at the beginning :-)
Greetings Joshua!
Chris says
I forgot to add something. Sometimes people are scared at being in silence. They could feel their true feelings (usually covered by a daily rush) and it could not be very pleasant. Someone could discover that he or she doesn’t lead a desired life. The easiest escape from that is just noise (or just doing many things at the same time, too much work etc.) – sidetracking from our interior.
Cari says
As the old song goes, “Silence is golden.” I get distracted easily and with all of today’s mind clutter, I have to shut the noise off when I can. Recently I have started driving without the radio in the car and just focusing on driving and thinking. I also love the fact that we do not subscribe to cable TV so NO commercials!
Neal Samudre says
Thanks for this, Joshua. Because many people are forgoing silence, we forget the benefit it has on our internal growth, like how our character is shaped. I’m hoping we all learn to better embrace the silence necessary to lead more meaningful lives.
Louis says
I agree. Silence is something we are so distant from now. This is also why I love the outdoors so much. ‘
Thanks for the post!
Sandy says
I have a 4 year old and 10 month old so silence is a rare gift that doesn’t cross my days very often. It’s a breath of fresh air when I have a moment of silence.
Judy says
psalm 46:10
“Be still, and know that I am God! I will be honored by every nation. I will be honored throughout the world.”
Kayse says
I just wrote myself a note the other day to write a blog post in the upcoming weeks about the importance of enjoying silence. I’m amazed at how often people are uncomfortable with silence. I think it’s so important to consciously take some time each day away from all the noise and distractions. Even just cooking dinner with no music or tv in the background can be so relaxing and clear my head. Great post!