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“Contentment is natural wealth, luxury is artificial poverty.” —Socrates
There were many reasons we chose to become minimalist and simplify our lives. We were frustrated with clutter. We discovered the time that was wasted managing our possessions. We realized joy was not found in our possessions. And we determined that we value other things far more than physical belongings. This initial process of simplifying our home required energy, effort, and encouragement.
But the process of remaining minimalist and living this counter-cultural lifestyle against all odds requires something completely different. It requires knowing how to be content.
Contentment is the lifeblood of minimalism. And without it, the journey towards minimalism is short-lived. Discontent will always rear its ugly head and become a great obstacle to fully thriving in a simple and happy life.
Not only does contentment provide the opportunity for minimalism, it also reduces your stress level, improves your outlook, relaxes your body, and makes your life enjoyable. There is an unmistakable freedom that accompanies contentment: a freedom to be who you are, enjoy who you are, and live the life you were destined to live.
Yet in our consumeristic-culture where discontent is promoted and material gratification is encouraged, learning to be content can be very difficult. It is certainly a personal journey that we all must travel and nobody’s journey will look the same.
Finding Contentment
Although there is no one-size-fits-all program to fully-attain contentment, you can still learn how to be content by being intentional. Here are six tips you can apply today to find more contentment in
1. Practice gratitude. It is impossible to develop contentment without gratitude—they are inseparable. And a grateful person is one who has learned to focus on the good things in their life, not the things they lack. The simple discipline of beginning the exercise will undoubtedly shift your focus back to the many good things you already have.
2. Take control of your attitude. A person who lacks contentment in their life will often engage in “when and then thinking” – “when I get _______, then I will be happy.” Instead, take control of your attitude. Remember, your happiness is not reliant on the acquisition of any possession. Your happiness is based solely on your decision to be happy—this may be one of the most important life lessons you can ever learn.
3. Break the buying habit. For many of us, it has been ingrained into our lives that the proper way to diffuse discontent is to purchase the outward item that is seemingly causing the discontentment. Almost no energy is spent determining the true root of the discontent. Are you dissatisfied with your wardrobe? Go buy new clothes. Not content with your vehicle? Go buy a new one. We have gotten into the habit of satisfying our discontent by simply spending more money.
We must break that habit. Material possessions will never fully satisfy the desires of your heart (that’s why discontent always returns). The next time you recognize discontentment surfacing in your life, refuse to give into that bad habit. Instead, commit to better understand yourself and why the lack of that item is causing discontent. Only after you intentionally break this thinking will true contentment begin to surface.
4. Stop comparing yourself to others. Comparing your life with someone else’s will always lead to discontentment. There will always be people who “appear” to be better off than you and seemingly living the perfect life. But be advised, we always compare the worst of what we know about ourselves to the best assumptions we make about others. Their life is never as perfect as your mind makes it out to be. You are unique. You are special. Your life is different. And it’s always better that way. Prioritize learning how to stop comparing yourself to others.
5. Help others. When you begin helping others, sharing your talents, time and money, you will find yourself learning to be content. The practice will give you a finer appreciation for what you own, who you are, and what you have to offer.
6. Be content with what you have, never with what you are. Never stop learning, growing, or discovering. Take pride in your personhood and the progress that you have made, but never become so content that you cannot find room for improvement. Contentment is not the same as complacency. As soon as you stop growing, you start dying.
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FAQ About How to Be Content
What is the definition of contentment?
Contentment is finding joy in what we already have in our lives, feeling or showing satisfaction with our possessions, status, or situation. It’s being happy without trying to find fulfillment in acquiring more material possessions.
What are the benefits of contentment?
Contentment allows us to stop comparing ourselves to others and it allows us to break the cycle of wanting more. It lets us be grateful and happy for all that we have. This approach to life is scientifically proven to reduce your stress level, improve your outlook, relax your body, and make life more enjoyable.
What is the difference between contentment and complacency?
The difference can seem minor but there’s actually a world of difference. Contentment is to be happy with what you have and find satisfaction in your present circumstances. Complacency is being unsatisfied with how your life is in the moment but still being unwilling to make changes to improve your situation.
Is contentment a choice?
Absolutely, although it’s not as easy as it sounds. Learning how to be content comes from a combination of intentional mindset shifts, habit changes, and being aware of our thoughts and actions.
Lucas says
Joshua, I have been following your blog and I truly do appreciate your articles and advice. Your articles have led me to a path towrds minimalism. Despite many changes and personal growth I am having difficulty attaining what I want most and what I believe almost all of us want. Number 2 on this article and in many other articles you say happiness is a decision and a choice. I am very greatful for my loved ones and blessings and I truly try to be happy. I am involved in my community and often volunteer in various charities. However despite this, I feel an emptiness inside. It is very difficult to explain. I am a religious person and do have an active prayer life so this is not the “void” that only God can fill as many would describe. This emptiness is of a different nature. I believe it has to do with a break up over 2 years ago. Since then I have never been able to get in to another relationship. Have you or anyone here felt this emptiness? Is there a cure? Thank you for any help.
M. Engel says
Lucas, I would recommend seeing a Christian counselor. A minister often offers free counseling and provides the opportunity to talk about what it is that is making you feel empty. If you find someone, who is a good listener, you can often figure it out on your own. They also can offer helpful advice. I would like to add to the blog. Happiness is fleeting and is a byproduct of the circumstances in life. Regardless of making a choice to be happy, we can feel empty inside when we are lonely, have lost a job, a best friend, etc…However, joy is a worthy choice to pursue and joy is more consistent than happiness. Joy is a result of the choices we make like deciding to do the right thing. Also, remember that feelings are a result of our thought process. Think good things and that empty feeling should begin to dissipate. Don’t be a victim of your thoughts, but take captive every thought and make it obedient to Christ (2 Cor. 10:5).
Rowan says
You may be experiencing some form of depression. While we can choose our responses to situations in life, some may cause physiological changes that we need to rewire. Note that I am not saying such situations inherently need medication. I’m just saying that they may require counseling or therapy to address. It may be something you cannot address with prayer alone, and there’s no shame in that. The gods and goddesses call people to be therapists so they can help people.
Debbie says
I look at this as a journey with a very long term destination. I don’t give myself grades on my “success” I just keep trying to clean up the issues.
Joseph says
“As soon as you stop growing, you start dying.”
This is the best quote! I will start using this as my mantra to continue my quest for lifelong learning. Thanks!
NikkiZ says
Joshua,
I wanted to comment about practicing “Gratitude” . The discipline of making a gratitude list every day for the past 3 years has significantly shifted my life. During a particularly challenging portion of my life I was spiritually and financially broken. I was riddled with guilt that my children would “do without”. I began a daily emailed gratitude list.
A transformation has taken place, I see and appreciate thinks I never even paid attention to, much less took the time to enjoy. Over and over my faith has been restored as I always “have what I need for today” My relationship with my children has clarity and much more communication.
I did get to see you speak in Gretna, Nebraska recently.
I am grateful for that.
NikkiZ
Teresa says
I went to a home yesterday that family just moved into. Huge home and lots if stuff. A part of me wanted to cry because my house is so small. They were showing off everything and I felt the green eyed monster rear her head.
Then I realized that none of the other people there live in a McMansion like that. We were the normal ones and I felt better.
Krista says
“Contentment is not the same as complacency.” This was so important for me to “hear”… Thank you!
Carol MacMillan says
This was just what I was needing today. I’ve been having issues with ‘smaller living’ and ‘less stuff’ envy recently. I’ve been getting increasingly frustrated that my decluttering doesn’t seem to be moving along at the pace I’d like and on top of that my husband and children aren’t really interested in reducing their stuff any further. Some days it feels like I’m drowning in everyone else’s stuff. So from today I’m going to start writing down the things that I’m grateful for and try to keep a record of how far we have actually come in the last year. I wish I’d taken photos of before to compare with now but I can still take them now to remind me in the future. Thanks for this post :)
tashanicole says
“we always compare the worst of what we know about ourselves to the best assumptions that we make about others”…… That is SO true yet I have never thought of it that way. Thank you for another great post.
Ryan says
You should be content with what you are. That last bit is bad advice. The rest is great.
Colette says
I read a quote from Joel Osteen about being grateful. It said something like, someone on earth would gladly trade places with you, right where you are. Thank God for everything you have. This post was fantastic (as always) and the other one you wrote about life not being perfect. These are two things I am trying to stay aware of. It is amazing how God puts things like this right in front of you because it is what He wants us to understand and get. Thanks again. :)